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# User Rev Content
1 root 1.2 [JanMan über O'Reilly]
2     [07:41] <JanMan> naja, Win32-Buecher ohne ende.
3     [07:42] <JanMan> Powering a machine on in the Win32 environment.
4     [07:42] <JanMan> nene, scherz am rande. fuer geld ziehen sie sich aus.
5     [07:42] <JanMan> aber die DE-Leute sind ok.
6     %%
7     [JanMan beim suchen eines exploits in OpenSSL]
8     [07:05] <JanMan> das nenne ich russisch:
9     [07:05] <JanMan> EVP_PKEY *key = NULL;
10     [07:05] <JanMan> STACK_OF(PKCS12_SAFEBAG) *bags = NULL;
11     [07:05] <JanMan> STACK_OF(PKCS7) *safes = NULL;
12     [07:05] <JanMan> PKCS12_SAFEBAG *bag = NULL;
13     [07:08] <JanMan> (#define STACK_OF(type) struct stack_st_##type)
14     %%
15     Hlade's Law:
16     If you have a difficult task, give it to a lazy person -- they
17     will find an easier way to do it.
18     %%
19     [Über Marco, der immer noch nicht bemerkt hat, das man sein gecos-Feld auf
20     "Marco Maisenhelder \(Micro$oft-Fetischist\)" gesetzt hat.]
21     >> Der wird es auch nie schnallen ;-)
22     > aber echt argllll. Oh Herr schmeiss Hirn vom Himmel (hoffentlich triffts
23     > den richtigen.
24     %%
25 root 1.1 [from janmans .sig]
26     > " Man gebe jedem Niedersachsen - seinen eigenen Castor-Kasten. "
27     %%
28     [a small perl program]
29     :(); { :: | :: } ;
30     %%
31     [a small fork-bomb for bash]
32     :() { : | : ;} ; :
33     %%
34     [messages I got while trying to get files from a windoze ftp server]
35     New: 464 files, 0 symlinks
36     <--- 501 Access violation at address 004E65B5 in module 'G6FTPSrv.exe'. Read of address 00000000
37     <--- 501 Access violation at address 004E65B5 in module 'G6FTPSrv.exe'. Read of address 00000000
38     <--- 501 Access violation at address 004E65B5 in module 'G6FTPSrv.exe'. Read of address 00000000
39     %%
40     From: Jarkko Hietaniemi
41     [...]
42    
43     >Would gcc exports step forward? How long back does the -traditional-cpp
44    
45     Must. Get. More. Sleep. s/ports/perts/
46     %%
47     > There is a mechanism for this already. It is called overloaded
48     > constants.
49    
50     I have a mechanism that can replace Perl: it's called Turing's machine.
51     Or an abacus, for that matter. More details on your proposed solution
52     would be conducive for further discussion.
53     %%
54     > Is there a kernel development irc room anywhere? If not, does anyone think
55     > it might be useful?
56    
57     I'd just like to point out that it's called a channel, not a
58     room. Room is a term introduced by AOL, and I don't think it has
59     much to do with IRC.
60     %%
61     From: Linus Torvalds <torvalds@transmeta.com>
62     Subject: Re: Linux 2.4.2 fails to merge mmap areas, 700% slowdown.
63    
64     [...]
65     Cool. Somebody actually found a real case.
66    
67     I'll fix the mmap case asap. Its' not hard, I just waited to see if it
68     ever actually triggers. Something like g++ certainly counts as major.
69     %%
70     [sorry, that's internal, folks ;)]
71     [07:17] <marco2> elmex heisst jetzt plagiator...
72     %%
73     [http://www.latimes.com/business/cutting/20010405/t000029080.html]
74    
75     Like all good paranoid fantasies, mine has a villain: the Japanese.
76     Japanese electronics designers have been deliberately building
77     clocks into everything in hopes of weakening our industrial might.
78    
79     Now, you might say, "Dave, that's crazy talk. The Japanese have a
80     lot more of these gadgets than we do. They're gadget freaks,
81     man. They'd be hurt by this as much as we are, or even more." Which
82     shows how much you know, pal.
83    
84     The Japanese don't have daylight saving time.
85     %%
86     [messages we got while we massacred our institute's configuration]
87     /scsi2/user2# Apr 5 00:01:17 islhp7 sendmail[1539]: savemail: HELP!!!!
88     Apr 5 00:08:16 islhp7 sendmail[1626]: savemail: HELP!!!!
89     %%
90     [a JAPH using doubled characters only]
91     s//pprriinntt ""JJuusstt AAnnootthheerr PPeerrll HHaacckkeerr,,""22//11;;
92     y yzzyyccss;;##s
93     s((((.................................))((((((((..??))))))))))(($$11))ee;;
94     %%
95     [from the FWP mailinglist]
96     > OR is spelled "|" in the version of Perl I have, not "&" :)
97     Your version of perl sucks.
98     %%
99     [01:43] <elmex_> ah-oh-uh
100     [01:44] <schmorp> leitung durchhacken
101     [01:44] <elmex_> wieso? welche?
102     [01:45] <schmorp> die, auf der du nach dem durchhacken auch noch sitzt? ;9
103     [02:03] <elmex_> das mit dem durchhacken daurert noch
104     [02:03] <elmex_> da isn stahltraeger in der wand
105     [02:04] <elmex_> muss ich erst drumherum
106     [02:04] <elmex_> ;)
107     [02:04] <schmorp> ist doch gut. seine leitungen soltle man ja auch nicht durchhacken
108     [02:04] <elmex_> nich? aber du sachstes doch?
109     [02:05] <schmorp> *sigh*
110     %%
111     I agree the message is pretty useless: you need to know what it means
112     before you can understand it :)
113     %%
114     > now. Rather than the current system of "measure this item onscreen
115     > and enter the figure from your ruler" to calculate DPI, I think it
116     > would be more userfriendly to have the shape of some common object
117     > that you could stretch to fit. For example, you could select A4
118     > paper, place the top of a sheet against the monitor, and stretch or
119     > shrink the virtual outline until it fits the physical outline. That
120     > would give a pretty decent measurement, I think
121    
122     IMHO (I have thought about this before) the perfect object is a CD
123     There is nowhere in the world which does not have CDs, they are always
124     the same size to within mm and they are perfectly round, so they can
125     easily be used to check that your circles are circular _if_ that is
126     what you want (cheap screens will distort things too badly for this to
127     be worth attempting).
128    
129     I'm too busy to do anything about it though, so if a piece of A4 paper
130     floats your goat, go for it! It's about time the Americans finally
131     caught up to the 20th century and went metric anyway...
132    
133     Nick.
134     %%
135     From: "Mike Rebane" <reba0002@algonquincollege.com>
136     Date: Thu, 22 Mar 2001 12:48:48 -0500
137     X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook IMO, Build 9.0.2416 (9.0.2910.0)
138    
139     I dont know if you are the right person to be asking about this, but here it
140     goes anyways. I was wondering if you could direct me to some information on
141     how to hack into paysites. Im currently a networking student in college and
142     have a good knowledge of win 98 win 2000 and win NT. My e-mail adress is
143     magic_bone@hotmail.com
144     %%
145     > > > I guess then someone would want
146     > > > { ... } for (...) if ...;
147     > > > to work :-)
148     > >
149     > > Funnily enough I wrote that very thing only yesterday.
150     >
151     > Eh?
152     >
153     > $ perl -we '{ print "$_\n" } for (@a) if $a'
154     > syntax error at -e line 1, near ") if"
155    
156     He didn't say it worked. :)
157     %%
158     From: Jarkko Hietaniemi
159    
160     On Mon, Nov 20, 2000 at 08:10:52PM -0600, Jarkko Hietaniemi wrote:
161     > I find it irksome that
162     >
163     > for ( ... ) { ... } if ...;
164    
165     ...doesn't work, and that my send finger is too itchy.
166     %%
167     [a perl5 bug report]
168     From: Simon Cozens
169    
170     On Sat, Nov 18, 2000 at 05:49:55AM -0600, Dan Brumleve wrote:
171     > '' =~ ($re = qr((??{$i++ < 10e4 ? $re : ''})));
172     > Produces SIGSEGV.
173    
174     Looks like a feature to me.
175     %%
176     [Lukilein...]
177     "Wie man ein BSE-Unix überhaupt bedienen kann..."
178     %%
179     [hehe, the "critical thinking community", mainly located in the lesser
180     intelligent parts of the earth named "USA";)]
181    
182     "There are articles and studies showing that, at one time, all of Earth
183     continents were on one side of the planet. What the stories don't explore
184     is the question, if all the continents were on one side, what was on the
185     other? The other side has been described as a tremendous gap [...]"
186    
187     "We can see clear proof that the continents were all once connected by
188     simply looking at a map of the Earth and seeing how the pieces fit. That
189     would only mean that at one time, Earth was basically half a planet. If
190     you were to syphon all the water off of Earth's surface, you would see a
191     large gapping hole where the ocean has filled in this tremendous missing
192     part of the Earth. Where did it go? Why is Earth only half a planet?"
193     %%
194     [following cites are from Crypto-Gram 20010315]
195     I'll just reprint this from their Web site: "iBallot.Com uses a number of
196     security and encryption features that, when combined, provide a very high
197     level of security throughout the entire voting process. The details of
198     this process are proprietary, for obvious reasons. It does not make a
199     great deal of sense to disclose how the iBallot.Com security system works
200     only to have a hacker come into the system, read about the system's
201     security, defeat the security and tamper with the voting process. For this
202     reason, iBallot.Com does not publish its security processes. However, with
203     the foregoing being said, the iBallot.Com system does employ encryption and
204     secure server technology to ensure that the entire voting process is fair,
205     accurate and not subject to tampering."
206    
207     Encryption and secure server technology.... Boy, I certainly feel
208     better. Good thing they don't disclose their security; if they did some
209     hacker might read about it and break it. Who *are* these guys?
210    
211     <http://www.iballot.com/faq2.cfm?docid=28>
212     %%
213     It's too late; Microsoft fixed it. But just a few days ago there was one
214     more Q/A between the second and third question. It read: "Will the virus
215     impact my Macintosh if I am using a non-Microsoft e-mail program, such as
216     Eudora? If you are using a Macintosh e-mail program that is not from
217     Microsoft, we recommend checking with that particular company. But most
218     likely other e-mail programs like Eudora are not designed to enable virus
219     replication."
220     <http://www.microsoft.com/mac/products/office/2001/virus_alert.asp>
221     %%
222     [just some private thoughts]
223     Ever asked yourself why your handheld irda communication is so slow?
224    
225     IrOBEX (Irda Object Exchange): A standard made by Microsoft, and it really
226     shows.
227    
228     First of all, it is utterly inefficient in transfers: RTT totally dictates
229     transfer speed, not a good thing with Irda (which has a high RTT). This
230     totally circumvents the sliding windows irda protocol.
231    
232     Also, the IrOBEX specification talks a lot about "Unicode" text without
233     defining it (except through totally wrong descriptions like "Unicode
234     is two bytes/character", showing their total lack of knowledge since
235     this is just plain wrong. I wonder what they mean with "Unicode", some
236     MS-proprietary format? Not unlikely, given what they did to iso-8859-1).
237    
238     Reading through that document you will find that it would have been easy
239     to find people doing a better job. Actually, I think even apes would come
240     up with a saner protocol.
241     %%
242     [voting by television, the american way...]
243     "They [voters] were like, 'Who are all these people? I thought it was only Bush
244     and Gore running,' " Tyson said.
245    
246     Many voters believed the 10 candidates were running for different offices and
247     cast votes for several of them, Tyson said. Some Spanish-speaking or Haitian
248     voters may have had difficulty understanding directions, Tyson said.
249     %%
250     IBM has withdrawn CPRM...
251     <http://news.cnet.com/news/0-1006-201-4922288-0.html?tag=mn_hd>
252     ...and replaced it with something almost identical:
253     <http://slashdot.org/yro/01/02/23/2134255.shtml>
254     A good analysis by John Gilmore:
255     <http://cryptome.org/cprm-smoke.htm>
256     &&
257     [Midori-Linux FAQ]
258     Q: What can I do about Netscape crashing?
259     A: Any experienced user of Linux Netscape is used to
260     seeing it crash and the included version of Linux Netscape
261     is no exception. This is probably not good, but the product
262     does not come with source code. The workaround is to run
263     Netscape in a loop.
264     %%
265     Subject: [reiserfs-list] Free Space - Where did it go?
266     %%
267     [Technologieregion Karlsruhe (und andere)]
268     marco: Die Region zwischen Stuttgart, Heilbronn und Karlsruhe produziert
269     mehr als Laender wie Schweden, die Schweiz oder Spanien!
270     marco: Im neuesten Technologiebarometer von wired stehen wir auf Platz 2
271     hinter dem Silicon Valley in bezug auf Technologie und Infrastruktur
272     %%
273     [2001-03-14, 3sat, Kulturzeit zum Absturz der MIR:]
274     "ist mir egal"
275     %%
276     From: Hans Reiser
277     Subject: [reiserfs-list] fsck now uses lost and found!
278    
279     Dad, make sure the docs get updated.
280     %%
281     [debugging message found in the siemens data exchange software]
282     hallole
283     %%
284     I have seen that many drives either have a pathetically small queue or
285     have completely broken tagged queueing. I guess thats what happens when
286     most vendors target their hardware for micro$oft.
287     %%
288     1925 With a drink so good, 'tis folly to be thirsty
289     1929 The high sign of refreshment
290     1929 The pause that refreshes
291     1930 It had to be good to get where it is
292     1932 The drink that makes a pause refreshing
293     1935 The pause that brings friends together
294     1937 STOP for a pause... GO refreshed
295     1938 The best friend thirst ever had
296     1939 Thirst stops here
297     1942 It's the real thing
298     1947 Have a Coke
299     1961 Zing! what a REFRESHING NEW FEELING
300     1963 Things go better with Coke
301     1969 Face Uncle Sam with a Coke in your hand
302     1979 Have a Coke and a smile
303     1982 Coke is it!
304     -- Coca-Cola slogans
305     %%
306     [strings recently found in my /proc/cpuinfo]
307     model name : Heavily Overclocked Pentium II (Klamath) (266Mhz/66Mhz FSB)
308     %%
309     [02:24] <elmex> schmorp:
310     [02:24] <elmex> ich wollte mal meine logik ueberpruefen an deiner erfahrung
311     %%
312     [Die letzte Woche war zuviel für Paul]
313     Nach mehrstuendigen Laptop-um-/-neu-/-rauf- und runterinstallationen
314     erlitt unser allseits bekannter und beliebter RechnerHiWi
315     islpaul.bettinger am heutigen Nachmittag einen Totalabsturz. Nach der
316     Meldung "Die Anwendung 'Installiere Cheflaptop' wurde aufgrund eines
317     ungueltigen Vorganges beendet" begann er sinnlose Lieder zu singen "Die
318     Karawane zieht weiter, der Sultan haelt durch". Unmittelbar darauf
319     wurde seine Brille blau, der Schriftzug "Allgemeine Schutzverletzung"
320     erschien. Nach einem Reboot durch Roland (ehemaliger Fussballer, zum
321     booten also gut geeignet), meldete Paul nur noch "Bitte Windows 2000 CD
322     einlegen" (siehe dazu die vorige PTS-Mitteilung). Nach Einlegen einer
323     Linux-Bootdiskette konnte Paul im Single User Modus wiederbelebt werden
324     - allerdings nur mit einem Bruchteil seiner urspruenglichen Faehigkeiten
325     (640k Speicher, 16bit Farbwahrnehmung, kein Plug&Play). Er plant nun eine
326     Karriere als Windows Sysadmin oder Java Programmierer.
327    
328     Beileidbekundungen und Spenden bitte an
329     hi09@isl.mach.uni-karlsruhe.de
330     %%
331     [RMS about gcc snapshots]
332     From: Richard Stallman <rms@gnu.org>
333    
334     [...] Red Hat did make their own release from a snapshot, which was an
335     uncool thing to do. [...]
336     %%
337     "Als das Universum einige zehntausend Jahre alt war - logarithmisch
338     betrachtet also vor relativ kurzer Zeit -, ..."
339     [Spektrum der Wissenschaft, 3/2001, S. 38]
340     %%
341     "Es ist ein wunderbar beglückendes Gefühl, wenn ein selbstgefertigtes
342     Programm zum ersten Mal in die Rechenmaschine eingelesen wird, wenn die
343     Maschine anschließend rechnet und die richtigen Resultate ausdruckt."
344    
345     "Manche Programmierer erliegen dem Rausch dieses Gefühls so sehr,
346     daß sie süchtig werden und über dem Programmieren andere Dinge
347     vernachlässigen. Erfahrungsgemäß hört diese Sucht nach 0.5 bis 2 Jahren
348     von selbst auf und macht dann häufig sogar einer gewissen Abneigung gegen
349     die Maschinen Platz."
350     [Prof. Dr. Karl Nickel (TH Karlsruhe), "ALGOL Praktikum", 1964]
351     %%
352     My previous job, and some contract work I have done, involved writing
353     software for Windows. My WORST problems were incompatibilities between
354     Windows NT and Windows 95. The APIs do NOT, I repeat NOT! NOT! NOT!
355     work the same on the various Windows flavors, as soon as you start
356     doing non-trivial applications. Three times at least, portability
357     problems from NT to Win95 cost me sleepless nights. Debugging stuff
358     like that is hell when you don't have the source.
359    
360     And when things break on Win95 where they ran on NT, what do you do,
361     run a debugger on Win95, where a crash can (and will) bring down the
362     whole system? Ugh, the horror.
363     %%
364     > You know XOR is patented (yes, the logical bit operation XOR).
365    
366     US Patent #4,197,590 held by NuGraphics, Inc.
367     %%
368     Legend has it Microsoft once found a patent of theirs which IBM appeared
369     to have infringed, and were very excited at the possibility of something
370     to hold over IBM, so their lawyers met IBM's lawyers. The MS lawyers
371     beamed "look at our patent you've infringed!" IBM's lawyers replied "look
372     at this pile of our patents YOU'VE infringed... let's start with this
373     one. A Tab key." MS suddenly realised they were outlawyered...
374     %%
375     From: David Woodhouse
376     > Okay, so if we are going to get real stupid about the whole thing, I
377     > wonder if Microsloth is going to patent the patent?
378    
379     Filing nuisance patents for obvious stuff which shouldn't ever get granted
380     is a viable business method and as such is patentable in the US.
381    
382     After all, what patent officer is going to point out the prior art?
383     %%
384     http://vger.kernel.org/lkml/#s3-9
385     %%
386     [recently on linux-kernel]
387     From: Alan Cox
388     > > Yeah. We can have this as part of the locale settings, changable by
389     > > echoing the desired locale string to /proc/sys/kernel/lc_all.
390     >
391     > Just an idea, . . but isn't this something better done in userland?
392    
393     Please remember this is an international list. For the benefit of certain
394     users please mark all sarcasm with the word NOT or a simply face
395     %%
396     From: Russell King
397     Date: Sat, 3 Feb 2001 23:31:26 +0000 (GMT)
398     To: Albert D. Cahalan
399    
400     Albert D. Cahalan writes:
401     > The units seem to vary. I suggest using fundamental SI units.
402     > That would be meters, kilograms, seconds, and maybe a very
403     > few others -- my memory fails me on this.
404    
405     iirc, SI comes from France, and therefore it should be "metres"
406    
407     [flames to /dev/null please] ;)
408     %%
409     [11:19] <pho3nix> ich hoffe du bist dir im klaren darüber, das ein Mensch,
410     der was von dir hielt, jetzt so beleidigt wurde, dass er nichts mehr mit
411     dir zu tun haben will, COMMUNICATION END
412     [11:19] <schmorp> pho3nix: ich weiss ja nochnichtmal, warum?
413     %%
414     [über "Mediengestaltung"]
415     [10:39] <elmex|Zz> pho3nix: information mit desingt ueberlagern
416     [10:40] <schmorp> elmex|Zz: ueberlagern oder erestzen, das its hier die frage?
417     %%
418     [perldoc perlembed]
419     You can sometimes _write_faster_code_ in C, but you can always _write_code_faster_ in Perl.
420     %%
421     [03:34] <JanMan> Arvoreen: elmex-werbung: "Nur echt elmex, wenn Lukas drinnsteckt" :)
422     %%
423     [09:26] <JanMan> bevor du arbeiten auf lukas-server nimm den job als massenmoerder.
424     [09:34] <JanMan> elmex: pass' auf, dass keine loop entsteht:
425     nameserver->lukas_arsch->lukas->dein_arsch->du->name-server
426     %%
427     [linux/net/ipv4/netfilter/ip_nat_ftp.c]
428     /* So there I am, in the middle of my `netfilter-is-wonderful'
429     talk in Sydney, and someone asks `What happens if you try
430     to enlarge a 64k packet here?'. I think I said something
431     eloquent like `fuck'. */
432     %%
433     [20:44] <elmex|aw> ich werde mir nochmal ueberlegen ob ich heute nochmal hier her komme......
434     %%
435     [09:40] <kiki> zu spaet
436     [09:40] <JanMan> kiki: hey, blasen hilft jetzt auch nicht mehr...
437     [09:41] <kiki> lutschen hat noch nie bei dir geholfen
438     [09:41] <kiki> aushungern schon
439     [09:41] <JanMan> elmex: ja, das hat mit blume + biene zu tun.
440     [09:41] <elmex> ?
441     [09:42] <elmex> JanMan: ich kenne mich schon sehr wohl damit aus. nur halt noch keine erfarung
442     %%
443     [Sierpinski Triangle, by Rich Morin]
444     for$y(0..31){for(0..31){print$_&$y?$":'*'}print$/}
445     %%
446     [From RDFStore::Stanford::Digest::Util, which is a java library ported to
447     perl:]
448    
449     $SIG{__WARN__} = sub { return undef; }; #to take off the bloody utf warns
450    
451     [now, as for some comments: it took me hours to debug code that used warn
452     to, well, warn users but the users didn't see anything. The intent of the
453     above code was obviously to get rid of the "illegal multibyte character"
454     warning in perl. This is the typical way a java programmer reacts to bugs
455     in his code: "I don't understand this computer thing anyway, so let's just
456     disable the message and pray it works"]
457     %%
458     [Another "one-liner" mail... Please spam him ;)]
459     From: "Alexander Daskalov" <alexanderd@alexsmail.com>
460     Date: Mon, 5 Feb 2001 12:44:11 -0800
461     X-Mailer: <IMail v6.05>
462    
463     I was just curious how many people are on ths gimp mailing list? Whoever+
464     can see this message please reply with a simple answer like: i am, or+
465     i'm on the list!, etc. Please reply, i thik everybody else might want to+
466     know this same information, it also gives us a chance to know each other+
467     better! So please reply to this message if on the mailing list!
468     %%
469     [I was looking for ISO3166 && ISO639 tables in the corresponding "local"
470     language, if applicable, and came up with this:]
471     http://www.tieke.fi/sc32wg1/wg1n155.pdf
472     %%
473     [imap-2000c/c-client/unix.c]
474     * This file is dedicated to my dog, Unix, also known as Yun-chan and
475     * Unix J. Terwilliker Jehosophat Aloysius Monstrosity Animal Beast. Unix
476     * passed away at the age of 11 1/2 on September 14, 1996, 12:18 PM PDT, after
477     * a two-month bout with cirrhosis of the liver.
478     %%
479     [from qmail's maildir(5)]
480     Many sites use Sun's Network Failure System (NFS), presumably because the
481     operating system vendor does not offer anything else.
482     %%
483     [Lukas Grundwald]
484     Der Film scheint echt gut zu sein: geht viel kaputt.
485     %%
486     [waiting for windows...]
487     http://www.cool-pix-server.de/pix/microsoft/microsoft002.jpg
488     %%
489     [x86 really is a cool design]
490     > For our specific purposes, that's not important. We already flush the cache
491     > before we create uncached regions (via ioremap_nocache). I understand that as a
492     > general Linux feature, you can't ignore cache incoherency, but I don't think
493     > it's a hard requirement.
494    
495     Actually you can't ignore it or the processor will have a heart attack
496     if the cached page mapping is used even speculatively. I've done some
497     experimenting, if the page is mapped cached in one place, and UCWC in
498     another, things will not work. Its extremely likely the processor will
499     cease to function. Its not like having cached and uncached mappings of
500     a page (which does work on the Intel processors, we use that feature in
501     the agpgart and the DRM in fact.) When you mark a page UCWC, you better
502     have removed all cached mappings or your asking for REAL trouble.
503     %%
504     > once again. On the Debian group it's invariably "how do I load
505     > Netscape?"
506    
507     can't be. debian sounds more like: "who do i have to ask for using
508     netscape, and do we all agree on /usr/local/bin/. ?"
509     %%
510     The COBOL language was created specifically to reduce the amount of
511     commenting necessary in a program, because the English-like sentence
512     structure could be read and understood by humans. The FORTRAN language was
513     created so that math types could "talk" in a language more familiar to
514     them, letting the computer take care of the details about how to perform
515     the specified task step-by-step.
516     %%
517     There is an old programmer's rule.
518    
519     "Documentation? Too bad. If the code was damned hard to write, it should
520     be damned hard to understand."
521     %%
522     [Linus]
523     Tabs are 8 characters. They are NOT adjustable. Never have been, never
524     will be. Anybody who thinks tabs are anything but 8 chars apart is just
525     wrong. It's that simple.
526     %%
527     [yes, thank you, it helps a lot ;)]
528     09:31] *** Joins: Unkn0wn [chaos@AC880AE2.ipt.aol.com] has joined #schmorp
529     [09:32] <Unkn0wn> Nah, I won't alert yas. Was just cruisin around and found your
530     site of H-games and thought bout thankin you for puttin it up. I figure most ppl
531     never take a moment to thank someone. =P <Bows, and heads back to #VB on
532     Undernet>
533     %%
534     [character normalization might be harmful]
535     > In short, normalizing prior to digesting AVOIDS allowing
536     > inconsequential changes to change the digest. If I have misunderstood the
537     > point of the section cited, I'm sure someone will correct me.
538    
539     Your scenario is correct as far as it goes. But consider a signed
540     document that contains an element or attribute named
541     "autorisation_de_découvert" ("credit limit").
542     A forged version of the document that contained the name
543     "autorization_de_de'couvert" (where ' = COMBINING ACUTE) would pass
544     a normalization + signature check. However, the document processor
545     might well fail to recognize it as having the semantics of "credit limit"
546     and treat it as unknown and to be ignored. Bad news: the forger
547     now appears to have unlimited credit!
548     %%
549     ["my spam"]
550     99% of mine is from China (either *.cn or 163.com or some other
551     numbering .com or .net. The .org is frowned upon in China - the TLD of
552     protestors and disidents). Half of what's left comes from either .kr
553     or .br. I'm fully in favor of an Internet Death Penalty against those
554     TLD's and associated domains till they clean up their acts.
555     %%
556     [from linux-kernel]
557     Hello Linus, my name is Rick Jones. I am the person at Hewlett-Packard
558     who drafted the "so _obviously_ stupid" sendfile() interface of HP-UX.
559     [... snip ...]
560     never forget what leads to the downfall of the protagonist in Greek
561     tragedy...
562     %%
563     From: "Mike A. Harris"
564    
565     On Wed, 10 Jan 2001, Jeremy Huddleston wrote:
566     >---- A notice to spammers ----
567     >Unsolicited electronic mail advertisements to my email address is
568     >strictly prohibited. Pursuant to California Business and Professions
569     >Code, Section 17538.45, senders of unsolicited electronic mail
570     >advertisements to me may be subject to a civil penalty of $50 per
571     >message plus attorney's fees.
572     [SNIP long sig]
573    
574     O - K then. Nice sig. Too bad that it is at least as big as
575     most spam mailings themselves. Instead of preventing spam,
576     all you're doing is contributing to it.
577    
578     I just delete spam now as it is easiest most of the time.
579     However fortunately, the below sig comes from a static and easily
580     procmailable address.
581    
582     One more note is that no law of California, nor anywhre else
583     means jack shit 50 meters away from your keyboard, so it is all
584     just a waste of bandwidth.
585     %%
586     rm: Entfernen von Verzeichnis »./xxx/po« nicht möglich: Die Datei existiert bereits
587     %%
588     [during a toilet session, this flashed/flushed through my mind/brain]
589     /bin/true --version | read && echo eek, a gnuzifist\!
590     %%
591     [stefan thought this would be better]
592     /bin/true --version | read && rm -rf / # get rid of non-posix Windows stuff.
593     %%
594     [Java-Design]
595     [02:53] <schmorp> in c 1 stunde suchen und probieren und dann 7 zeilen
596     [02:53] <JanMan> schmorp: nein. in C 2 minuten suchen.
597     [02:54] <JanMan> ich weiss nicht, an welchen level ich wo patchen soll.
598     [02:55] <JanMan> es gibt eine Key, eine RSAKey, eine RSAKeyPublic/RSAKeyPrivate
599     klasse, alles muell.
600     [02:56] <JanMan> (ueberall noch ein praefix SSH..)
601     [02:56] <JanMan> und die sachen sind ueber SSHRSAPublicKeyFile abgewickelt...
602     [02:57] <JanMan> klar gibt es auch SSHRSAPublicKeyString.
603     %%
604     [02:38] <JanMan> Lexikon: Java - siehe "ins Knie ficken, objektorientiert"
605     %%
606     [02:30] <JanMan> schmorp: java has too many keywords but lacks an important one.
607     [02:32] <JanMan> schmorp: yes: "broken". Java needs a "broken" keyword. "Error:
608     missing "broken" but class seems "broken".
609     %%
610     On Thu, Jan 11, 2001 at 09:34:08PM -0500, Michael Rothwell wrote:
611     The man pages for open, read and write say that if a file is opened
612     using the O_NONBLOCK flag, then read() and write() will always return
613     immediately and not block the calling process.
614    
615     the man pages are wrong
616    
617     --cw
618     %%
619     From: "David S. Miller" <davem@redhat.com>
620     ...
621     My take on this is that khttpd is unmaintained garbage.
622     %%
623     [Subject: line on linux-kernel]
624     Re: That horrible hack from hell called A20
625     %%
626     From: "Vladimir V. Saveliev"
627     > tar cvpf - foo | ( cd reiserfs; tar xvpf - )
628     > Halfway through it gets a kernel oops and
629    
630     How fast does it oops?
631     %%
632     From: Stefan Traby <stefan@hello-penguin.com>
633    
634     On Sun, Jan 07, 2001 at 02:01:05PM +0000, Alan Cox wrote:
635     > NFSv2 has a 32bit file offset. Thus the largest file on NFSv2 you want to
636     > touch is 2Gig.
637    
638     In theory, yes.
639     In practice you don't want to touch NFS under Linux at all, so the
640     2GB limit is a theoretical one. :)
641     %%
642     [10:44] <elmex> --------------------------------------------------------
643     [10:44] <elmex> | | | | | | |
644     [10:44] <elmex> | | | |-----| | | |
645     [10:44] <elmex> | |-------------------------| | | |
646     [10:44] <elmex> | |-| | .---------------------------.| |-------|
647     [10:44] <elmex> | | | |Welcome on elmex.x-paste.de|| | |
648     [10:44] <elmex> | |-| | `---------------------------'| | |
649     [10:44] <elmex> | |----------| |-----------------------| |
650     [10:44] <elmex> | | |-| | | | |
651     [10:44] <elmex> |-| | | | |-----| |
652     [10:44] <elmex> | |------------|-------------- | | |
653     [10:44] <elmex> | |-----------------------------------|-| |----|
654     [10:44] <elmex> | |-| |-| | | | |
655     [10:44] <elmex> | |-| | | | | |
656     [10:44] <elmex> |-| | | | | |
657     [10:44] <elmex> --------------------------------------------------------
658     %%
659     Any committee IQ: average intelligence of members, divided by headcount.
660     %%
661     "There were a lot of snickers in my course... The students looked at me
662     like I was a stegosaurus still walking around when I told them that the
663     [irrational spending of many dot-coms] was not sustainable. You have to
664     take in more money then you put out, or you're toast."
665     -- Ken Morse, managing director, MIT Entrepreneurship Center
666     %%
667     "Wenn _ich_ das sage, darf ich das."
668     [Lukas Grunwald]
669     %%
670     [about having sponsoring message in YOUR syslog]
671     From: Felix von Leitner <leitner@convergence.de>
672     Date: Thu, 14 Dec 2000 21:33:13 +0100
673     To: reiserfs-list@namesys.com
674    
675     Thus spake Wojciech Puchar (wojtek@wojtek.from.pl):
676     > > To view list of copyright holders type `copyright' at the shell
677     > > prompt.
678     > very good. maybe implement /proc/info/copyrights /proc/info/sponsors
679     > /proc/info/authors?
680    
681     Grand idea.
682     Let's also add /proc/info/spammers,
683     /proc/info/people-who-bothered-linus,
684     /proc/info/people-who-disagree-with-hans-reiser,
685     /proc/info/people-who-were-flamed-by-alan-cox and
686     /proc/info/people-who-marc-lehmann-dislikes.
687    
688     NOT.
689     [...]
690     %%
691     [Nick and I used to fight a LOT]
692     Subject: Re: suggestion for gimp 1.3 and later
693     From: Nick Lamb <njl98r@ecs.soton.ac.uk>
694    
695     On Wed, Dec 13, 2000 at 03:29:41AM +0100, Marc Lehmann wrote:
696     > I think the best way would be to make any gtk label/text widget be
697     > selectable. I don't know why this has not been done so far, but it might be
698     > an interesting experiment.
699    
700     Yes, I've often thought this. And everyone knows that if Marc and I agree
701     about something it must be right (?) or at least it's in no-one's interest
702     to disagree...
703     %%
704     http://finance.yahoo.com/q?s=LNUX&d=2y WINNER
705     http://finance.yahoo.com/q?s=RHAT&d=2y 2nd prize!
706     http://finance.yahoo.com/q?s=CALD&d=1y 3rd prize!
707     [und Lukas sagt:]
708     ... man beachte die logarithmische Skala!
709     %%
710     [from "how to photograph a total eclipse", in the nasa 1999 solar eclipse
711     report:]
712     ... The best strategy is to choose one aperture or f/number and bracket
713     the exposures over a range of shutter speeds (i.e. 1/1000 down to 1
714     second). Rehearsing this sequence is highly recommended since great
715     excitment accompanies totality and there is little time to think.
716     %%
717     [boy, now I know why I dislike GNOME]
718     http://www.helixcode.com/~miguel/bongo-bong.html
719     %%
720     ["kORBit, a CORBA implementation for the linux-kernel"]
721     From: Jamie Lokier <lk@tantalophile.demon.co.uk>
722     Date: Sat, 9 Dec 2000 11:34:39 +0100
723    
724     Alexander Viro wrote:
725     > > It was just an example. Basically, you'd be able to do in with just
726     > > about any language that has ORBit bindings.
727     >
728     > Yeah... "Infinitely extendable API" and all such. Roughly translated
729     > as "we can't live without API bloat". Frankly, judging by the GNOME
730     > codebase people who designed the thing are culturally incompatible with
731     > UNIX.
732    
733     Agree. I remember a big complaint about Windows was the huge APIs,
734     compared with Unix' tiny list of syscalls. And then I saw the GNOME
735     docs... ew!
736     %%
737     > Good question. The whole thing makes me nervous... in fact, perhaps we
738     > should really consider using the BIOS INT 15h interrupt to enter
739     > protected mode?
740    
741     From my experience with BIOS authors, only if Windows 98 uses the same function
742     with the same arguments, the same stuff top of stack and the same segment
743     registers loaded ;)
744     %%
745     > > there... If someone wants to back-port the driver to 2.2, this makes it
746     [...]
747     > backports hurt forward progress.
748    
749     beware of content free dogma
750     %%
751     > What operating systems use local time as their basic clock these days? Just
752     > wondering.
753    
754     Any IBM PC compatible machine that runs under at least one Microsoft OS
755     has to keep the battery-backed CMOS clock chip in local time, because
756     unlike most other operating systems (e.g., any Unix flavour), none of
757     Microsoft's CMOS clock drivers have a UTC option. Rather disappointing
758     and every year an unneeded hassle after DST switches on multi-OS
759     machines. From discussions with Microsoft staff, I have to conclude that
760     no-one within Microsoft has even understood the problem.
761    
762     Markus [G. Kuhn]
763     %%
764     >Keith,
765     >
766     >Please consider the attached patch for inclusion in all future versions
767     >of the modutils depmod program for compatiblity with RedHat and
768     >RedHat derived Linux distributions.
769    
770     I have a big problem with Redhat. They make incompatible changes to
771     utilities, do not feed patches back to maintainers then expect the rest
772     of the world to follow their lead. The -i and -m flags to modutils are
773     not the only example, I recently found IA64 and Sparc patches they had
774     added to modutils code and not bothered to tell me. Other distributors
775     are much better about sending me patches, Debian and SuSe in particular
776     do the right thing.
777    
778     Since "-F System.map" in modutils is equivalent to "-m System.map -i"
779     and works on all distributions, not just Redhat, the "-m -i" patch is
780     unnecessary. Consider this my protest against bad habits by
781     distributors, they created the mess with their lack of communication
782     and they have to fix it.
783     %%
784     10:44] <JanMan> falls Du mal DB2 crashen musst:
785     [10:45] <JanMan> connect reset;
786     [10:45] <JanMan> connect to sample user db2admin using db2admin;
787     [10:45] <JanMan> select * from employee where year(birthdate)=1999 and firstnme<'';
788     %%
789     [a perl quine, by ilmari karonen:]
790     printf+(q(printf+(q(%s))x2))x2
791     %%
792     On Tue, Dec 05, 2000 at 07:22:34PM -0500, M&M Samsel wrote:
793     > You see I have about 10 years of commercial development experience and
794     > pretty much know business procedures from huge corporations and business
795     > midgets and what I should expect or not.
796    
797     You've not demonstrated your 10 years of experience.
798     You've just proved that killfiles are useful.
799     %%
800     [once upon a time, when poul started gnomeicu:]
801     gnomeicu: Rohrbruch (beim Speichern der Konfiguration)
802     %%
803     [subject from a thread on the gcc steering commitee mailinglist when
804     glibc-2.2 was released]
805     Re: glibc 2.2 a fait accompli
806     %%
807     [08:05] <JanMan> elmex: Fehlt Dir einmal Klopapier, versuche es mit GNU m4. :)
808     %%
809     # root:0Ayj0AZhTi4O2:11272:0:99999:7:::
810     # kma:1NXgYu6J80kvc:11225:0:99999:7:::
811     # elmex:0ImdHgG2TEQAE:11273:0:99999:7: : :
812     %%
813     <JanMan_> soll ich das ganze uber einen perl-hash erzeugen ?
814     <schmorp> klar.. %hash->generate
815     <JanMan_> oesi siedelt nach de: %oesi->degenerate
816     %%
817     [From "How the mind of a php programmer works", by Marc Lehmann]
818    
819     (1) it works on msie 5 (alt.: netscape 4) so the code is
820     standards-compliant.
821     (2) an entity looks like "&" entityname ";"
822     (2a) [conclusion] the fragment href="xxx&notes=77" doesn't contain a valid
823     entity, so the browser must use it as is.
824     (2b) [corollary] "<blubb>" is not a valid html element, so the browser
825     must react according to what I assume it should do (display, ignore).
826     (2c) in some programs I assume differently than in others.
827     %%
828     [Oh no, Don Becker again ;)]
829     > which one is the linksys card, so I have included the entire listing. (Is it
830     > even listed? Perhaps this is my problem.)
831    
832     That's your problem.
833    
834     There is no PCI Ethernet device listed.
835    
836     Check that the card is fully inserted into the PCI slot.
837     (If it's an ISA card, then it's not fully inserted into the PCI slot ;->)
838     %%
839     > > sure request_module _does_not_ accept funky module names. Why allow
840     > > people to shoot themselves (and, by extension, all other Linux users
841     > > out there) in the foot?
842    
843     > I thought that was the whole purpose of Unix/Linux?
844    
845     True! Very true! Unix/Linux requires that the user shoot
846     themselves in the foot. Windows automates that process and does it
847     for the user, thus making foot shooting user friendly. :-)
848     %%
849     > Turn on encryption, and try sending attachements > 1MB and tell me if
850     > you see any problems, like emails sitting in /var/spool/mqueue for a day
851     > or two until they go out. I can guarantee you will.
852    
853     No encryption use; and the maximal message size is 1Mb (for sanity's sake,
854     after somebody sent a PowerPoint presentation (some 3Mb), then thought that
855     perhaps the target didn't have PowerPoint, and sent it again with the
856     PowerPoint package, then noticed this might not work either, and sent it
857     _again_ with the full MS Office attached... the joys of sysadminning ;-)
858     --
859     Dr. Horst H. von Brand mailto:vonbrand@inf.utfsm.cl
860     %%
861     Ulrich Drepper <drepper@redhat.com> writes:
862    
863     > "Theodore Y. Ts'o" <tytso@MIT.EDU> writes:
864     >
865     > > Arguably though the bug is in glibc, in that if it's using signals
866     > > behinds the scenes, it should have passed SA_RESTART to sigaction.
867     >
868     > Why are you talking such a nonsense?
869    
870     [Note to self: remove kitten from keyboard before writing mail.]
871     %%
872     [Simon Budig, nachdem er erfahren hatte, daß Lars Eilebrecht nicht wusste,
873     daß Leerzeichen in URLs nicht erlaubt sind:]
874     "Also, Lars, das hätte ich nicht gedacht, jetzt hast du aber jede Menge
875     Gurupunkte bei mir verloren."
876     %%
877     [amazon readers about the Annotated C Standard by Herberdt Schildt,
878     which is much less expensive then the official version (search also for
879     Bullschildt below ;)]
880    
881     "The price difference reflects the value of the annotations. At no time
882     do the annotations clarify, enhance, or supplement the standard."
883     %%
884     Stefan Traby wrote:
885     >
886     > On Mon, Nov 06, 2000 at 08:43:04AM -0500, Chris Mason wrote:
887     >
888     > > We have a few websites floating around, [...]
889     >
890     > Many mirrors are also out of sync. Especially the primary server :)
891     %%
892     > This happens with both ext2 and reiserfs, since at least 2.2.15.
893    
894     I installed noflushd on my laptop, which was running 2.4.0-test6, and
895     it did the same thing.
896    
897     Sorry I can't offer more info. Someone spilt a glass of water on it about
898     a week ago. :(
899    
900     --Jack
901     %%
902     "Kalk hat diese Waschmaschine getötet"
903     %%
904     [It is] best to confuse only one issue at a time.
905     -- K&R
906     %%
907     <elmex> JanMan: "||01:42:20|| <elmex> schmorp: jo, die sprache muss man nicht erklaeren"
908     %%
909     [please kids, don't try this at home]
910     indent -kr -l78 -lc78 -lps -i8 -br -pcs -psl -bbo -bad -bap -cs -nbc -nhnl -nss
911     %%
912     http://www.attrition.org/gallery/ms/kmfms.jpg
913     %%
914     [PApp.pm]
915     $modules => { "" => "" };
916     %%
917     Das einzig sichere Mittel gegen Migräne ist das Entfernen des Kopfes.
918     %%
919     <JanMan> elmex: Sprichwort "Relaye doch bei dnx, dann kriegst Du nix." :)
920     %%
921     [From Russel Coker's .sig]
922     > --
923     > If you can't program in C, PERL, and shell scripts then don't call yourself a
924     > Unix administrator. Every idiot on the net is claiming to be a Unix admin. :(
925     %%
926     [the two sides of the medal]
927     From: "David Schwartz"
928    
929     > Under Solaris 7, when the number of idle sockets was increased from
930     > 100 to 10000, the time to check for active sockets with poll()
931     > increased by a factor of only 6.5. That's a sublinear increase in time,
932     > pretty spiffy.
933    
934     Under Solaris 7, when the number of idle sockets was decreased from 10,000
935     to 100, the time to check for active sockets with poll() decreased by a
936     factor of only 6.5. Shouldn't it be more like 100? Sounds like Solaris' poll
937     implementation is horribly broken for the most common case.
938     %%
939     [lukas grunwald...]
940     [ich sag' dir, ] ... am nächsten Tag brüllt der mich vielleicht per e-mail an ...
941     %%
942     [from linux-kernel, about the rtl8139 network card]
943     > (After looking at the specification for the 8139, I am acctually ashamed
944     > of having bough one.
945    
946     Not an uncommon thought :)
947     %%
948     From: Stefan Traby
949    
950     Hi Marc !
951    
952     keycode 115 = ISO_Next_Group
953     keycode 116 = ISO_Prev_Group
954     keycode 117 = ISO_Level3_Shift
955    
956     Finde ich witzig, man erspart sich den lock-screensaver :)
957     %%
958     [I hope you get the point(s)...]
959     From: Alex LIVINGSTON <alex@agsm.edu.au>
960     Date: Wed, 18 Oct 2000 16:12:46 +1100
961     To: <tz@elsie.nci.nih.gov>
962    
963     At 07:40 +0000 2000-10-06, ken@halcyon.com wrote:
964     >But the thing is: mm/dd/yy[yy] is in widespread use (US), as is
965     >dd/mm/yy[yy] (much of Europe, I'm told).
966    
967     Slight refinement: dd/mm/[yy]yy. Used in all European countries - and
968     all countries colonized by a European country at one time or another
969     which haven't had a strong US influence since, and probably all
970     remaining Asian, African, and Pacific countries - that don't use
971     [yy]yy-mm-dd. mm/dd/yy[yy] is restricted almost entirely to the US
972     and a few neighbors. I would hesitate to say it is in widespread use.
973    
974     >[yy]yy-mm-dd was used
975     >in Japan even before the ISO standard came out.
976    
977     And in China, and in Sweden, and in Hungary, ... (possibly with different
978     separators). Also in the Arab world, in the sense that the digits (all of
979     them) appear in the same order from left to right, only Arabic is written
980     right to left.
981    
982     >But no culture
983     >has ever used [yy]yy-dd-mm format, and there is absolutely
984     >nothing to recommend it, so there is no reason to expect anyone
985     >to adopt it. Yes, the perverse can use that format just to
986     >confound us, but in practice one can safely assume that a
987     >nnnn-nn-nn date is in yyyy-mm-dd format.
988    
989     Thanks Ken. You've put it much better and more concisely than I could have.
990    
991     --Alex
992     %%
993     [recently, on the tulip driver mailing list]
994     From: Donald Becker <becker@scyld.com>
995     To: "Jon.Hinks" <Jon.Hinks@berkeley-ifa.co.uk>
996    
997     [most of the reply snipped...]
998    
999     > The contents of this email are confidential to the intended recipient. It
1000     > may not be disclosed to or used by anyone other than this addressee, nor may
1001     > it be copied in any way. If received in error, please contact Berkeley
1002    
1003     [[ The rest of the boilerplate omitted. ]]
1004    
1005     These terms do not apply. You have mailed to a published list. You hold
1006     the copyright to your writings, but by submitting questions to the list you
1007     grant the list publisher (me) the right to publish in this list and related
1008     forums. "Related forums" may be collected archives of the list on any media,
1009     and quotes from questions in FAQs.
1010    
1011     (Long boilerplate appendages like this notice annoy me. Automatically
1012     attached copyright notices can never unilaterally extend your rights, so why
1013     try to claim that they do?)
1014     %%
1015     On Fri, 6 Oct 2000, Andre Hedrick wrote:
1016    
1017     > void go_take_a_dump (float load)
1018     > {
1019     > if (pull_down_pants() && purge_bowles() && wipe_anus() && pull_up_pants())
1020     > flush(load);
1021     > else
1022     > wear(load);
1023     > }
1024    
1025     But here you make another classic mistake. Consider the case where
1026     purge_bowels() fails (-EWOULDBLOCK?).
1027    
1028     In that case, you don't actually execute the subsequent two procedure
1029     calls, which I'm sure we all agree is a suboptimal state of affairs.
1030    
1031     --
1032     dwmw2
1033     %%
1034     Factoid: 90% of all patents are never challenged, while 80% of those that
1035     are are overturned.
1036     %%
1037     "Going into court is throwing the dice."
1038     %%
1039     [Dipl. Ing. W******* D*******]
1040     "Lukas, eins muss dir klar sein, die ganze Kryptographie ist doch
1041     für den Arsch, wenn ich ein Stück von dem Originaltext habe und den
1042     verschlüsselten Text, knack' ich dir jeden Schlüssel in 50 Stunden."
1043     %%
1044     [some discussion between reiserfs enthusiasts:]
1045     Stefan: oh shit, everything coredumps, I'll just reboot.
1046     Marc gives some dumb comments.
1047     Stefan: No, I'll first check it with reiserfsck.
1048     Marc: Yeah.. and?
1049     Stefan: "reiserfsck: no reiserfs found"
1050     Marc: Oh, the superblock is damaged. Maybe you should just try the backup superblock...
1051     %%
1052     [t-online is just sooo cool:]
1053     Subject: mail failed, returning to sender
1054     From: <MAILER-DAEMON@fmrl01.sul.t-online.de>
1055    
1056     |------------------------- Failed addresses follow: ---------------------|
1057     <service@t-online.de> ... 550 Mailbox quota exceeded / Mailbox voll.
1058     |------------------------- Message text follows: ------------------------|
1059     %%
1060     [a play with a well-known-signature:]
1061     Deadlock, n.:
1062     Deceased Rasterman.
1063     %%
1064     [Jeff Williams & friends]
1065     ftp://ftp.informatik.uni-bremen.de/pub/doc/internet-drafts/draft-terrell-ip-spec-ipv7-ipv8-addr-cls-00.txt
1066     http://IPv8.vrx.net/
1067     http://www.gtld-mou.org/gtld-discuss/mail-archive/08030.html
1068     %%
1069     [some .signature]
1070     This message has been ROT-13 encrypted twice for extra security.
1071     %%
1072     [Andreas Mueller-Maghun for ICANN!]
1073     Allein der Kandidat des Chaos-Computer-Clubs (CCC) Hamburg, der schon
1074     mehr als 1.100 Unterstützungserklärungen erhalten hat, dürfte nach
1075     Einschätzung des arbeitskreises die Bedingung für eine Basiskandidatur
1076     zum ICANN-Direktorium schon jetzt erfüllen. Ausgerechnet er hat es aber
1077     nicht für nötig gehalten, auf die Anfrage der Behindertenvertreter zu
1078     reagieren. Seine Webseiten zeugen zudem von einem "Sicherheitskonzept",
1079     das Usern mit Sehbehinderung vor lauter technischen Barrieren keine
1080     Zugangsmöglichkeiten bietet. Der Arbeitskreis hält einen Vertreter solcher
1081     Positionen für unwählbar.
1082    
1083     Jens Bertrams (Pressesprecher)
1084     %%
1085     From: (Albert Y. C. Lai)
1086     Newsgroups: comp.lang.functional
1087     Subject: Re: what is "functional" (Re: Macros)
1088    
1089     Jerzy Karczmarczuk writes:
1090    
1091     > Their opinion: "well, *everybody* knows that this is not professional,
1092     > nobody uses functional languages, all your colleagues suggest that we
1093     > should learn Lex and Yacc, etc. -
1094     > but *WHAT A PLEASURE AND FUN* was to write these programs in Haskell.
1095     > Almost no run-time errors, ever!"
1096    
1097     A professor at my school got the opposite opinion from her students.
1098     She introduced ML (along with two other languages) as part of a course
1099     on the principles of programming languages in the third year. The
1100     students' opinion: this is such an annoyingly pedantic language, it
1101     refuses to let me run my program and get some partial though wrong
1102     results simply because I make a mistake!
1103    
1104     In other words, given that humans are bound to make mistakes, the
1105     students at my school prefer to see them manifested as run-time
1106     errors.
1107    
1108     So I look at your email address. Ah, you are in Europe and I am in
1109     North America. I guess that's why. Dijkstra is probably right about
1110     European programmers liking to do programming right and American
1111     programmers liking to chase after bugs.
1112     %%
1113     On Thu, Aug 24, 2000 at 11:15:09PM +0200, Werner Almesberger wrote:
1114     > yodaiken@fsmlabs.com wrote:
1115     > > This call shifts delivered signal numbers up so that
1116     > > "special" POSIX signals [.. like KILL] can be delivered to a process.
1117     >
1118     > Kind of a SIGOVERKILL ... yes, that could work.
1119     %%
1120     "The posix programmer knows the availability of everything, but the cost
1121     of nothing."
1122     %%
1123     [after the linux-kernel list was moved to a new machine]
1124     Jeffrey Hundstad wrote:
1125     >
1126     > So tell us about this new machine. OS? Filesystem? Memory?
1127     > CPU?
1128    
1129     Root password? :)
1130    
1131     John.Fulmer
1132     %%
1133     I think there is a world market for about five computers.
1134    
1135     Thomas J. Watson (Chairman, IBM) 1943
1136     %%
1137     > NO. They can/will use RAW_IO *IF* this is available to them. If not, they
1138     > will have to provide a proper kernel driver for their hardware. I know
1139     > which I prefer...
1140    
1141     Sure. And keep that dusty 2.4.3 kernel around just in case you someday need
1142     to upgrade the firmware for your disk, and the (binary!) kernel module only
1143     works with that one. Don't forget the 2.4.15ac12 which is for your USB
1144     scanner, and also the 2.6.7-12 (Red Hat) which is the only one with the
1145     updater for the new SCSI controller.
1146     --
1147     Horst von Brand
1148     %%
1149     [de.comp.lang.iso-c++]
1150    
1151     >Nicht alles was Standard ist, muss auch implementiert werden.
1152    
1153     [...]
1154    
1155     Nicht alles, was hinkt, ist ein Vergleich.
1156     %%
1157     [Drew Sanford about why not to do real-time by throwing faster hardware
1158     at your problem:]
1159    
1160     The F4 Fantom fighter. The plane was essentially a large block of metal, with
1161     a few advantagously aerodynamic surfaces, and big f****** engines. If you
1162     had engine trouble in a Fantom ...you had trouble.
1163     %%
1164     [Hans Reiser, on /bin/cp.. ;)]
1165     cp is inherently inefficient.
1166     %%
1167     >I thought disk drives contained vacuums, thus the extensive concern over
1168     >breaking seals on them.
1169    
1170     Air pressure is 1Kg/cm^2. I have never seen a hard drive case that looked
1171     nearly strong enough to take such pressure. Basically if you can't jump on a
1172     hard drive then it's not strong enough!
1173    
1174     ...
1175    
1176     There's a story that Dave Cutler (VMS and WNT architect) when he was at DEC
1177     did a test on a DEC hard drive by blowing cigar smoke into the drive which
1178     killed it properly. DEC then greatly enhanced their drive air filters. It
1179     could be just an urban myth though.
1180    
1181     Russell Coker
1182     %%
1183     >I've unsubscribed our somewhat less than intelligent friend.
1184     >Ah, Internet for the masses. What a wonderful idea.
1185    
1186     Yeah, let's have an IQ test before you're allowed to buy a modem.
1187     %%
1188     On Sat, Jun 24, 2000 at 02:40:33PM +0200, Marc Lehmann wrote:
1189     > "Yury Yu. Rupasov" wrote:
1190     > > All my current benchmarks show that reiserfs works correctly on
1191     > > deleting.
1192     >
1193     > Just a sidenote: you don't test correctness with benchmarks :(
1194    
1195     Wrong. Yury does.
1196     :(
1197    
1198     --
1199     Stefan
1200     %%
1201     "Jeff V. Merkey" writes:
1202     > I will provide a tool that decodes and repairs NTFS volumes to those
1203     > folks who run into this problem, but our agreements with Microsoft do
1204     > not allow us to distribute it for any purpose other than to assist
1205     > Microsoft customers who have corrupted drives. Also, this tool is
1206     > dependent on the DDK being present to run as it has dependencies on the
1207     > DDK DLL's, so you'll need to install the DDK to use it.
1208    
1209     DDK == "Disk Death Kit"?
1210    
1211     Ian Soboroff ian@cs.umbc.edu
1212     %%
1213     [very instructional movie, if you get what I mean...]
1214     00:30-02:05 (13) ( -35) Kabel 1 Das Mädchen am Ende der Straße The
1215     Little Girl Who Lives Down The Lane Psychodrama - KAN/F/USA - 1976 -
1216     Regie: Nicolas Gessner * Die 13-jährige Rynn (Jodie Foster) lebt allein in
1217     einer alten Villa und hütet ein schreckliches Geheimnis.
1218     %%
1219     [Einsichten in die "Kommunikation"]
1220     > > > Ich beschreibe dir, was in dem Moment an Eindruecken durch meinen
1221     > > > Kopf geht - in dem Augenblick bin ich Besucher und sehe was
1222     > > > mir gefaellt oder nicht - das ist wie ein Schmierzettel. Die
1223     > > > Ausarbeitung der Ideen kommt danach im Gespraech. Du packst solche
1224     > > > Sachen anders an - das seh ich ein. Aber ich bin mit dieser
1225     > > > Art chaos bisher immer ans Ziel gekommen. Was ich mach will -
1226     > > > machen muss - ist Feedback generieren. Ich lass Versuchsballons
1227     > > > aufsteigen und schau zu, wie sie entweder fliegen oder abgeschossen
1228     > > > werden. Dann reagier ich auf das Ergebnis.
1229     %%
1230     [Mitch, als Erklärung dafür, weshalb er blindlings ein (kaputtes) ssh-rpm
1231     installiert hat, das er über rpmfind gefunden hat:]
1232     Doch, echt! Der Server war trusted, der sah' ja sowas von vertrauenswürdig
1233     aus!
1234     %%
1235     [IMHO one of the main reasons linux is nicer]
1236     http://www.cyberport.com/~tangent/ix/bsod-story.html
1237     %%
1238     [On the reality of random numbers]
1239     > /dev in a world with dynamic hardware, so why bother? We only need
1240     > to provide random numbers to fill in struct stat. (zero works)
1241     Alan Cox [as usual ;)]
1242     %%
1243     [Flame Warriors]
1244     http://www.winternet.com/~mikelr/flame1.html
1245     %%
1246     A programmer who hasn't been exposed to all four of the imperative,
1247     functional, objective, and logical programming styles has one or
1248     more conceptual blindspots. It's like knowing how to boil but not
1249     fry. Programming is not a skill one develops in five easy lessons.
1250    
1251     --tom
1252     %%
1253     To: bugs@gimp.org
1254     X-Mailer: AOL 5.0 for Windows sub 105
1255    
1256     Hi there, I recently downloaded your gimp toolkit. At first I was having
1257     problems until I read your download help tip. I understand I have to compile
1258     it so I tried using Borland C++ Compiler but it said the line length exceeds
1259     editor capacity. Is there any other compiler I can use that wouldn't rip a
1260     whole in my wallet. Thank you for your support.
1261     %%
1262     ["General Information About Using VBScript with Outlook"]
1263     VBScript is designed to be a secure programming environment. It
1264     lacks various commands that can be potentially damaging if used in
1265     a malicious manner. This added security is critical in enterprise
1266     solutions.
1267    
1268     http://support.microsoft.com/support/kb/articles/Q167/1/38.ASP
1269    
1270     [Despite this "added security", however, VBscript still can modify,
1271     rename, delete files, modify windows registry entries and send email in
1272     the background]
1273     %%
1274     [Phil Agre on the "ILOVEYOU" virus and Microsoft's reaction]
1275     Scott Culp of Microsoft Public Relations, excuse me, I mean Microsoft
1276     Security Response Center:
1277    
1278     This is a general issue, not a Microsoft issue. You can write a
1279     virus for any platform. (New York Times 5/5/00)
1280    
1281     [and later]
1282     Mr. Culp also says this (CNET 5/5/00):
1283    
1284     This is by-design behavior, not a security vulnerability.
1285    
1286     [Phil closes]
1287     Microsoft shouldn't be broken up. It should be shut down.
1288    
1289     [See also http://dlis.gseis.ucla.edu/people/pagre/rre.html]
1290     [and http://commons.somewhere.com/rre/2000/RRE.notes.and.recommenda6.html]
1291     %%
1292     [Bruce Schneier about the "ILOVEYOU" virus]
1293     Expect even worse in the future. Systems running either Microsoft Office
1294     2000 or Internet Explorer 5.0 can be infected with these sorts of viruses
1295     even if the recipient doesn't open the attachment. That's right; if the
1296     system is running Internet Explorer with the default settings, it is
1297     vulnerable. The problem is caused by a programming bug in an Internet
1298     Explorer ActiveX control. Thank you, Microsoft.
1299     %%
1300     >Reaching to Fallingbostel was extremely amusing though, germany is
1301     >splitted into two halfs, one that doesn't know Fallingbostel and one
1302     >that 'heard of this place but have no idea where it is' at some point I
1303     >was almost convinced that there is no such place :)
1304    
1305     [Trashey / Quasars]
1306     %%
1307     Tom Christiansen writes:
1308     > I'm writing perlrtfm. It explains search techniques, not quickfix
1309     > switches plugging bursting dykes by springing more leaks.
1310    
1311     Irony potential in
1312    
1313     man perlrtfm
1314    
1315     is left to the reader.
1316    
1317     Nat
1318     %%
1319     Do you plan to release support for on-the-fly file and directory compression
1320     and encryption as in NTFSv2?
1321    
1322     (Imagine a system that in order to run needs a diskette or CD-ROM disk with
1323     private key - protection never seen except in movies ;-)
1324     %%
1325     [Telekom-Techniker, bei einer ISDN-UK0-Messung!]
1326     Ich: Also, einen Layer-1-Connect bekomme ich...
1327     Telekomiker: Layer-1? Was ist das? Aber ich bekomme ja auch gar kein Freizeichen...
1328     %%
1329     "I love the way Microsoft follows standards. In much the
1330     same manner that fish follow migrating caribou."
1331     Paul Tomblin
1332     %%
1333     [recently on p5p]
1334     >I am morally
1335     >convinced that map() was written based on grep()
1336    
1337     Considering they use the same op function, I'd say that's a distinct
1338     possibility...
1339    
1340     Dan
1341     %%
1342     [after the "Welle Erdball" performance on the Mekka&Symposium 2000:]
1343     <jan> bine: du solltest da nicht hingucken, das ist nicht gut fürn kopf
1344     <Bordeaux> after listening to this crap, and hearing *zugabe zugabe* i finally have the proof that all german c64 sceners are gay :)
1345     <Mr> zugabe
1346     %%
1347     "Why upon hearing his arguments I changed my opinion 360 degrees."
1348     Recent comment on the floor of some state legislature
1349     %%
1350     DIVIDE EMPLOYEE-EARNINGS BY EMPLOYEE-HOURS GIVING EMPLOYEE-PAY-RATE
1351     [cobol, *sigh*]
1352     %%
1353     It is expected that the Multics system will be published when it is
1354     operating substantially and will therefore be available for implementation
1355     on any equipment with suitable characteristics. Such publication is
1356     desirable for two reasons: First, the system should withstand public
1357     scrutiny and criticism volunteered by interested readers; second, in an
1358     age of increasing complexity, it is an obligation to present and future
1359     system designers to make the inner operating system as lucid as possible
1360     so as to reveal the basic system issues.
1361    
1362     Corbat_ & Vyssotsky 1965
1363     %%
1364     "Rule #7: Silence is not acquiescence.
1365    
1366     "Contrary to what you may have heard, silence of those present is
1367     not necessarily consent, even the reluctant variety. They simply
1368     may sit in stunned silence and figure ways of sabotaging the plan
1369     after they regain their composure."
1370    
1371     -- Paul Rinaldo
1372     [see also http://people.qualcomm.com/karn/rinaldo.html]
1373     %%
1374     On Sat, Apr 01, 2000 at 12:09:59AM +1000, Chris wrote:
1375     >
1376     > In case you guys havn't noticed...
1377     >
1378     > http://slashdot.org reports that XFS is now released.
1379    
1380     Yes, and http://www.freshmeat.net reports:
1381    
1382     Error: Unable to connect to MySQL Server ().
1383    
1384     ;-}
1385    
1386     --
1387    
1388     ciao -
1389     Stefan
1390    
1391     %%
1392     > The 'hypervisor' is a new term to me.. Are you refering to the
1393     > Transmeta CPU and it's native mode? If I read you correctly
1394    
1395     No its what the S/390 VM is often called. Its a supervisor for supervisor
1396     mode programs so illogically enough its a hypervisor 8). The IBM mainframe
1397     guys thing this kind of set up is routine. Unix is met with
1398     'You mean you cant run a new kernel on test at the same time as the old
1399     one' type remarks.
1400     [Alan Cox]
1401     %%
1402     Godwin's Law
1403    
1404     As a Usenet discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison
1405     involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one.
1406    
1407     [see also http://www.faqs.org/faqs/usenet/legends/godwin/]
1408     %%
1409     ["Stefan im IRC."]
1410    
1411     [01:53:07] <coda> anyone know how to get emacs to stop creating the file.name~ files?
1412     [01:53:24] <JanMan> alias emacs=vi
1413     [01:53:31] <coda> haha
1414     %%
1415     [remaining problems with OpenBIOS]
1416     Our SDRAM sizing and init code is not very good; we could use good code.
1417     The code we've been offered so far requires memory to work (oops!);
1418     requires a stack (oops!); or assumes a totally configured machine (oops!).
1419     %%
1420     [Alan Cox on wether special fs's should have require "//" in their path]
1421     > No :-) It's a feature. Some things are going REAL ugly without such things.
1422    
1423     Given //ipc or freebsd, I think I'd pick freebsd. Thats how ugly the idea
1424     is to me ok.
1425     %%
1426     "The code is self documenting." -- The Programmer.
1427    
1428     "I don't read C." -- The Tech Writer.
1429     %%
1430     [Stefan Sebolth, on the CeBIT, while listening to the original c64 "Giana Sisters" tune:]
1431     Haaach, da war die Welt halt noch in Ordnung!
1432     %%
1433     Remember, never ask a geek "why";
1434     just nod your head and back away slowly...
1435     %%
1436     The thought of implementing something like text and binary modes for
1437     files is a about a frightening for todays kernel developer's as a mouse
1438     to a women in a typical movie of the 50's ;-)
1439    
1440     Ralf
1441     %%
1442     It may be real, but it's icky. It's too traditional Unix ``I don't
1443     care if we lose 90% of our market base to NT if our competitor loses
1444     95% of THEIR market base!'' to be palatable.
1445    
1446     david parsons
1447     %%
1448     ["some time ago on p5p"]
1449     > ($host) = gethostbyname('localhost');
1450    
1451     >Sadly most UNIX boxes don't add a sane alias to their /etc/hosts file
1452     >so that trick is not portable.
1453    
1454     % grep localhost /etc/hosts
1455     127.0.0.1 localhost
1456    
1457     --tom
1458     %%
1459     ["some time ago on p5p"]
1460     On Mon, Feb 07, 2000 at 03:22:05PM -0700, Tom Christiansen wrote:
1461     > >But given that most slip drivers I have seen for OS/2 do not do this,
1462     > >the question is moot.
1463     >
1464     > I'll send you a free Unix system.
1465    
1466     Thanks, the doors in my house are well-balanced. ;-)
1467    
1468     Ilya
1469     %%
1470     [Elliott H Mitchell on the reiserfs list]
1471     > Me thinks if unwillingness to use tar over dump will stop you from
1472     > using a better filesystem there will be lots of other reasons that
1473     > will stop you from trying anything new too. So it is not really worth
1474     > trying.
1475    
1476     Yeah, if a filesystem randomly lost files and the authors had no plans to
1477     fix it, that would kind discourage one from using it...
1478     %%
1479     [Russel Coker on the reiserfs list]
1480     ... my old Thinkpad 380XD (Pentium-233 with 3.2G ide hard drive) running
1481     ReiserFS and exporting the file system over 10baseT Ethernet could
1482     outperform local hard drives on an AIX machine running JFS.
1483     %%
1484     [Peter Mattis, author of GIMP]
1485     I can't say anything about Rasterman because I've never looked at any of
1486     his code. My only comment about Raster is that he should learn to spell.
1487     %%
1488     [David Schwartz on linux-kernel]
1489     > ORBS does not do ANYTHING above try to send few LEGAL
1490     > strings to mailservers with LONG delays. So if you block ORBS you deserve
1491     > blocking :-)
1492    
1493     That's not the point. The point is that ORBS claims to be a list of
1494     validated open mail relays, and it's not. It's not supposed to be a list of
1495     people who deserve anything in particular. I'm sure if you talk to the
1496     people who have chosen to block ORBS, you will find that they have their
1497     reasons.
1498    
1499     DS
1500     %%
1501     [WDR, 19991216 Fernsehen mit Manuel]
1502     Es ist ein Fall bekannt, bei dem sich ein Patient über ein Jahr lang
1503     geweigert hatte, auf die Toilette zu gehen. Dann haben seine Verwandten
1504     und Ärzte ihn dazu überreden können, endlich die Toilette aufzusuchen. Er
1505     hat dabei auf einmal 37 Liter entleert.
1506    
1507     Danach lebte er noch ganz normal einige Jahre, bis er, wie in Amerika
1508     üblich, erschossen wurde.
1509     %%
1510     > - My Maxtor 27G drive ends up in PIO mode (non-SMP system, but likely
1511     [...]
1512     > Last time I reported this, I had a WDC31600, as hda, and the maxtor as
1513     [...]
1514    
1515     You committed a mortal sin in ATA............
1516     You never ever mix WD and Maxtor..........on day I will document why.
1517     Basically these two vendors have timings that are completely incompatable
1518     with each other on the same channel.
1519    
1520     IMHO, WD is crap..........however, you may split the two pieces of
1521     hardware and they will work fine under linux and all other OS's.
1522    
1523     This rule of "never ever mix WD and Maxtor" is OS independent.
1524     %%
1525     [ALF2-Benutzerhandbuch]
1526     "Nur eine tote Festplatte ist eine sichere Festplatte."
1527     %%
1528     Physicists write FORTRAN in any language.
1529     %%
1530     [OpenBOOT 3.10.6 response to pressing "Ctrl-Alt-Del":]
1531     ANY word at all is a candidate.
1532     USE words to see the entire dictionary.
1533     ok
1534     %%
1535     [SDF for POD Users]
1536     ... Beauty is in the eye of the beholder - even Lisp has it's fans. :-)
1537     %%
1538     <Xach> schmorp: i haven't been doing any gimpy things lately
1539     <schmorp> xach: well, who is doing gimpy things lately :(
1540     <Xach> schmorp: Mitch
1541     <schmorp> xach: ok.
1542     <Xach> schmorp: you are not keeping pace with the other germans
1543     <Xach> schmorp: you must work more diligently! FOCUS!! DON'T TALK!!
1544     <Xach> burrito, focus
1545     <Burrito> FOCUS you BABOON!
1546     %%
1547     [Paul Miller]
1548     ... I find Knuth's attitude to be far more logical: "Be careful about
1549     using the following code -- I've only proven that it works, I haven't
1550     tested it." ...
1551     %%
1552     Intel Inside -- Idiot Outside!
1553     %%
1554     Newsgroups: comp.lang.forth
1555    
1556     Bart Lateur wrote in message <383a4712.942513@news.skynet.be>...
1557     >Petrus Prawirodidjojo wrote:
1558     >
1559     >>So we must compete with Windows CE.
1560     >
1561     >"Please wait while your Toaster shuts down."
1562     >
1563     >"My microwave oven hangs, I have to reboot."
1564     >
1565     >No thank you. :-) I don't think Microsoft somehow can "automatically" be
1566     >the most obvious choice as a supplier of system software for embedded
1567     >systems.
1568    
1569    
1570     Quite so. Windows CE is rapidly losing what small market share they once
1571     had.
1572    
1573     --
1574     Neal Bridges
1575     %%
1576     On 27 Nov 1999, sanjay Kumar wrote:
1577    
1578     > Hi folks,
1579     > i got some problem in using linux.When segmentation fault happens four five times continously OS is not working properly,insted of I remove the core dump and core dump bug ,Why?
1580     > please reply to
1581     > sanjay_rect@rediffmail.com
1582     > and sigma_btl@vsnl.com
1583    
1584     Parse error.
1585    
1586     ---
1587     Alex
1588     %%
1589     From: Richard Earnshaw <rearnsha@arm.com>
1590    
1591     > Why do we really need to support compiling with -ansi when
1592     > including a non-ANSI header file in a C program?
1593    
1594     Because some vendors wouldn't recognize a C standard it if hit them. The
1595     amount of code that purports to be ANSI C code, but is in fact nothing of
1596     the sort, has to be seen to be believed.
1597    
1598     That doesn't mean that I don't want *my* program to be clean ANSI C.
1599     %%
1600     [one of the few good us movies]
1601     Talk Radio Mediendrama - USA - 1988 - Regie: Oliver Stone * Sein Zynismus wird dem Radiomoderator Barry zum Verhängnis.
1602     %%
1603     [guess the language AND the language revision ;)]
1604     ii = 44;
1605     p = &ii;
1606     *p = ii/*p;
1607     ii++; /* Don't forget to increment ii. */
1608     printf ( "ii = %d\n", *p );
1609     %%
1610     > But many systems set the RTC while running Win*ooze. That will affect
1611     > Linux time then.
1612    
1613     Here is another microsoft Innovation (TM):
1614    
1615     They now allow you to run your BIOS-clock in UTC! (Just like
1616     Linux. Woops. Just gave it away...)
1617    
1618     Roger.
1619     %%
1620     <Tommer> schmorp, for the next trick, do <frameset> <frame src=dataurl:> <frame src=dataurl:> </frameset> :)
1621     %%
1622     auto accident;
1623     register voters;
1624     static electricity;
1625     struct by_lightning;
1626     void *where_prohibited;
1627     char broiled;
1628     short circuit;
1629     short changed;
1630     long johns;
1631     unsigned long letter;
1632     double entendre;
1633     double trouble;
1634     union organizer;
1635     float valve;
1636     short pants;
1637     union station;
1638     void check; unsigned check;
1639     struct dumb by[sizeof member];
1640     %%
1641     [I like TV Movie's nexTView comments]
1642     22:40-00:05 (21) ( -34) ARD Mord auf hoher See Inflammable Thriller - USA
1643     - 1995 - Regie: Peter Werner * Stephen King
1644     verhunzt als Regisseur sein Buch im großen Stil.
1645     %%
1646     Carmen Lucia Tancredo Borges wrote:
1647    
1648     I have a program written in Fortran that runs on an IBM RS/6000
1649     worstation.
1650     %%
1651     I wrote
1652     > I hope not. chomp() should match the string in $?, no more or less.
1653     $/
1654    
1655     Damn shift key.
1656    
1657    
1658     Mike Guy
1659     %%
1660     [rfc2635]
1661     The term "spam" as it is used to denote mass unsolicited mailings or
1662     netnews postings is derived from a Monty Python sketch set in a
1663     movie/tv studio cafeteria. During that sketch, the word "spam" takes
1664     over each item offered on the menu until the entire dialogue consists
1665     of nothing but "spam spam spam spam spam spam and spam." This so
1666     closely resembles what happens when mass unsolicited mail and posts
1667     take over mailing lists and netnews groups that the term has been
1668     pushed into common usage in the Internet community.
1669     %%
1670     [CRYPTO-GRAM, November 15, 1999]
1671    
1672     The Doghouse: Microsoft Windows CE
1673    
1674     Microsoft encrypts your Windows NT password when stored on a Windows CE
1675     device. But if you look carefully at their encryption algorithm, they
1676     simply XOR the password with "susageP", Pegasus spelled backwards. Pegasus
1677     is the code name of Windows CE. This is so pathetic it's staggering.
1678    
1679     http://www.cegadgets.com/artsusageP.htm
1680     %%
1681     : Isn't the point that (void)'grep EXPR, LIST' is now better written as
1682     : 'EXPR for LIST'? Or am I misunderstanding your point here?
1683    
1684     It really doesn't bother me if people want to use grep or map in a void
1685     context. It didn't bother me before there was a for modifier, and
1686     now that there is one, it still doesn't bother me. I'm just not very
1687     easy to bother.
1688    
1689     The argument against using an operator for other than its primary
1690     purpose strikes me the same as the old argument that you shouldn't have
1691     sex for other than procreational purposes. Sometimes side effects
1692     are more enjoyable than the originally intended effect.
1693    
1694     That being said, I'd never grep someone in a void context myself.
1695    
1696     Larry
1697     %%
1698     [that one's only for insiders...]
1699     > : BASE @ . \ = 10, verified original base was restored
1700     Yeah. :-)
1701     %%
1702     [comp.lang.forth]
1703     > Old Antactic Explorers Penguin Recipe:
1704     [...]
1705     > Start fire under pot, raise seawater to boiling point.
1706    
1707     Since it is very difficult to find wood on Antarctica, typically
1708     penguins are used to light the fire (due to their fat, they burn well).
1709     I also woudln't use any water, the penguins are fried fine in their own
1710     fat (you can use old fat to heat up the pot for another penguin).
1711    
1712     Note that most people in Antarctica have been seal-slayers and
1713     whale-killers, so they were rough people. Usually, they didn't bother
1714     with killing the penguins before setting them on fire. I'm glad this
1715     receipts aren't used anymore.
1716     %%
1717     Sie muessen einen PC nicht einschalten um herauszufinden ob Windows
1718     installiert ist. Sehen Sie einfach nach, ob die Aufschrift auf der
1719     Reset-Taste noch lesbar ist.
1720     %%
1721     > Erinnert mich an den Kerl bei mir in der Videothek. Hab mir DHY ausgeliehen
1722     > und er sagt doch zu mir: "Ist aber mit Untertiteln." Sag ich: "Na prima!"
1723     > Fragt er: "Wieso, was ist denn daran so interessant, wenn man nichts
1724     > versteht?"
1725     %%
1726     [de.alt.anime]
1727     Bei meiner Videothek fliegt ein "Ghost in the Shell" Tape
1728     "Ab18" rum. Das machte mich irgendwie stutzig weil auf
1729     der Schachtel meiner 16er zwei Szenenfotos sind, die im
1730     Film gar nicht vorkommen (ironischer Weise direkt über
1731     dem "Uncut & Unzesored" Schildchen). Andererseits ist
1732     mir völlig schleierhaft, was es bei dem Filmchen zu zensieren
1733     geben soll. Nur die oben beschriebene Feststellung hat diese
1734     Frage erneut aufgeworfen.
1735     ji!
1736     %%
1737     I do worry about syntactic clutter, ever since my daughter came
1738     in, looked over my shoulder, and said, "What is that, swearing?"
1739     [Larry Wall]
1740     %%
1741     Der letzte untergegangene altisraelitische Stamm war der der
1742     Altpreussen.
1743     - Norbert Marzahn am 15.8.98 in
1744     de.soc.politik.deutschland
1745     %%
1746     > > Aber die Theorien, die Norbert aufstellt, ueber zum Beispiel die
1747     > > gegossenen Steinformen, die sich hochdruecken, den fuerchterlichen
1748     > > Kometen, der im vergangenen August die Erde zerstoert hat und solche
1749     > > Sachen find ich wirklich Klasse ;-)
1750     >
1751     > Jau. Und erstmal seine Erklärungsversuche, wenn's mal wieder nichts
1752     > geworden ist (wo bleibt eigentlich der Planet X, der während der
1753     > Syonnenfinsternis auftauchen sollte?)...
1754    
1755     Drei Tage Dunkelheit und viele Trümmerteile sollte er bringen, gell,
1756     Norbert?
1757     %%
1758     Marzahnismen: http://www.snafu.de/~dbrueg/normarz.html
1759     Norbert Marzahn sagt: Ich besitze die Mittel, um
1760     "Rechts"- und "Links"-Radikalismus auszuloeschen.
1761     %%
1762     http://welcome.to/levitenbuero/
1763     %%
1764     <Xach> babelfish.pitney.org: "We may not get it right, but boy are we fast!"
1765     %%
1766     Subject: GNU compiler
1767     From: "Steve"
1768     Date: Thu, 16 Sep 1999 19:05:03 -0400
1769     To: <gcc@gcc.gnu.org>
1770     X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3155.0
1771    
1772     [the following was a single line, of course]
1773     I downloaded the compiler and am trying to install it and the
1774     instructions seem to be very complicated. Can you help me understand
1775     how to install them? There is no setup file and I have downloaded from
1776     several sites in the thought that I might have the wrong version. Your
1777     assistance would be greatly appreciated
1778    
1779     Thanks,
1780    
1781     Steve
1782     %%
1783     [an "I am doing high end graphic design" type of person:]
1784     > Also, could someone tell me how to calculate DPI of an image? I have not
1785     > managed to figure this DPI system out, for example, if an image is a
1786     > 100?50 pixels, what's the DPI??
1787     %%
1788     <tigert> xachbot, op
1789     <XachBot> tigert: I have an 88 magnum. It shoots through schools.
1790     <tigert> ahem
1791     %%
1792     <tc> xachbot, acro FOOBAR
1793     -XachBot:#gimp- FOOBAR: FTP Operation Over Big Address Records | See FUBAR [Net jargon] (cached)
1794     <tc> just when you thought you had something to baffle xachbot
1795     %%
1796     [the release of perl 5.000]
1797     Date: Mon, 17 Oct 94 16:48:04 -0700
1798     From: Larry Wall <lwall@scalpel.netlabs.com>
1799     Subject: It's soup.
1800    
1801     Okay, it's there.
1802    
1803     ftp://ftp.netlabs.com/pub/outgoing/perl5.0/perl5.000.tar.gz
1804    
1805     The first one who tells me about a bug in it gets shot.
1806    
1807     Larry
1808     %%
1809     l33+ h4X0rz
1810     %%
1811     # A random text generator using Markov chains
1812     perl -e 'while(<>){$f.= $_}@l=split(/\s+/, $f);for($i=0;$i<@l-1;$i++){$W{$l[$i]
1813     }.=" ".$l[$i+1];}sub a{$w=$l[1]}&a;sub b{print "\n"}while($w){if(!($W{$w})){&b;
1814     &b;&a;last if ($q++>3);}print"$w ";@p=split(/ /,$W{$w});$c=@p;until($s=int(rand
1815     ($c))){1}$w=$p[$s]}&b' big_text_file
1816     %%
1817     > && d'oh! i knew that! can she allow her lusers to use deja? here is the url
1818     > && for the post with the whole description of how i used -P
1819     >
1820     > Well, access to deja isn't forbidden, but access to the keyboard is.
1821     > And there's no mouse.
1822     >
1823     > Abigail
1824    
1825     Wow. Someone else who reads usenet by osmosis... cool.
1826    
1827     Matt.
1828     %%
1829     Ok, our threads aren't so bad. Python's have one big
1830     giant global interpreter lock. :-)
1831    
1832     - --tom
1833     %%
1834     From: Linus Torvalds <torvalds@transmeta.com>
1835     Date: Fri, 6 Aug 1999 11:42:19 -0700 (PDT)
1836    
1837     On Fri, 6 Aug 1999, Hubert Mantel wrote:
1838     >
1839     > So the huge ISDN update in proposed-2.2.11 will be removed from the final
1840     > 2.2.11 release?
1841    
1842     [ Irritated mode: FULL BLAST ]
1843    
1844     Are you being stupid on purpose, or were you born that way?
1845    
1846     Go back and read the thread. Read why I'm irritated. READ. THINK.
1847     %%
1848     Understanding is a three edged sword. Do you *want* to get the point?
1849     %%
1850     ["MVS uses quite heavy algorithms for swapping"]
1851     On Mon, Aug 02, 1999 at 07:55:32PM +0200, Lieven Marchand wrote:
1852     > Last time I looked at it, it got to the point they had moved some
1853     > ASSISTs into microcode. IIRC, some manipulations of the process
1854     > block. I doubt Intel/Sun/MIPS/IBM is going to accomodate Linux quite
1855     > that much ;-)
1856    
1857     IBM is really really good on process technology. They have had to be.
1858     %%
1859     MVS spends a lot of time running OS algorithms to allow full
1860     preemption that Linux wastes on running user applications.
1861     %%
1862     [comments on the gcc-2.95 release]
1863     <QUOTE>
1864     I'm having problems compiling it for HP-UX 10.20. Any ideas?
1865    
1866     (I haven't actually finished downloading it yet, but I just know I'm
1867     gonna have problems with this crappy OS ;-)
1868     </QUOTE>
1869     %%
1870     The Internet interprets Windows as damage,
1871     and routes around it.
1872    
1873     Roger Larsson
1874     Skellefteå
1875     %%
1876     [configuring gcc]
1877     Noone should use --prefix=/usr without --with-local-prefix=/usr/local
1878     %%
1879     'You can solve any programming problem with another level of indirection,
1880     except the problem of too many levels of indirection.'
1881     %%
1882     [http://www.itknowledge.com/tpj/issues/vol4_1/tpj0401-0015.html]
1883    
1884     Z-code interpreters have also been written in Java; unfortunately, when it
1885     comes to cross-platform compatibility, Java's user-interface classes are
1886     finicky and unstable--just ask anyone who's tried to reason with the AWT
1887     on different JVMs.
1888    
1889     [and later]
1890    
1891     Pilfer is a practical implementation of two of the cardinal rules of
1892     adventure gaming:
1893    
1894     1.Anything that is not nailed down is mine.
1895     2.Anything that I can pry loose is not nailed down.
1896     %%
1897     [the ||-operator can be thought of as "or", && can be thought of as
1898     "and", but how would you call the ??-operator?]
1899    
1900     >>>>> "NK" == Nathan Kurz <nate@valleytel.net> writes:
1901    
1902     NK> ?? -> huh?
1903    
1904     That's a great name. The huh? operator.
1905    
1906     <chaim>
1907     %%
1908     `One of the reasons we continue to use Fortran is that it's easier to fix
1909     code written without attention to such details in Fortran than in other
1910     languages. To put it another way, Fortran is the only language where
1911     people who barely get by with their numerical skills can "write useful
1912     numerical code." Many times those people are the only experts in their
1913     specialty available to put a needed procedure into practice.'
1914     %%
1915     [Moderator der Sending "Teatime" auf "Radio Okerwelle", 1999-07-12]
1916     Ich muß schließlich hören was ich sage, damit ich weiß, was ich denke.
1917     %%
1918     [Dr. Dobbs #8, 1999, describing how you can AVOID downloading or executing
1919     Java applets, scripts and ActiveX controls while _parsing_(!) an html
1920     page]
1921     ... you must utilize IOleControl::OnAmbientPropertyChange with the
1922     value DISPID_AMBIENT_DLCONTROL. Before you can do this, however, you
1923     must call IOleObject::SetClientSite so that IOleControl will work
1924     properly. This is the reason you derive from IOleClientSite, even
1925     though you don't extend its functionality in any way. After the call to
1926     OnAmbientPropertyChange, IE4 will call your Invoke method to check the
1927     value of DISPID_AMBIENT_DLCONTROL. Invoke simply sets the correct bits to
1928     disable the behaviour you don't want and returns NOERROR.
1929     [Still interested in knowing how you can disable the "file not found"
1930     dialog box that will pop up when you try to parse a non-accessible file?]
1931     %%
1932     [Linus, whom I quote rarely ;-]
1933     Message passing as the fundamental operation of the OS is just an
1934     excercise in computer science masturbation. It may feel good, but you
1935     don't actually get anything DONE.
1936     %%
1937     Advantages of Windows NT over Linux:
1938     * It's easier to explain the crash was not your fault.
1939     * You've to remember only one solution all to your problems: Reboot.
1940     * You can use your mouse to type an email-message.
1941     %%
1942     > 1) On the PIII, there is the capability to get a system unique serial
1943     > number from the CPU. Does Linux read this data already? Is there plans to
1944     > read the serial number and then disable the capability (maybe so you could
1945     > get the serial number from the OS)?
1946    
1947     Current Linux disables it and doesn't save the value.
1948     %%
1949     [CRYPTO-GRAM 1999-06-15]
1950     "Microsoft set the security state-of-the-art back 25 years with DOS, and
1951     they have continued that legacy to this day."
1952     %%
1953     [From "The Elements Of Style: UNIX As Literature", by Thomas Scoville]
1954     "In a world increasingly dominated by image culture (TV, movies, .jpg
1955     files), UNIX remains rooted in the culture of the word."
1956     %%
1957     > If it is clearly documented that will not happen.
1958    
1959     Yeah, sure. Unfortunately, if the "correct" treatment of this feature
1960     means to change a dozen source files (and rth's comments make me fear
1961     that that's the case), the chance that someone, somewhere forgets to say
1962     exactly why these changes were necessary (and on what other changes in
1963     other files they depend) is far larger than I want to consider. We've
1964     seen this before. Lucky we are that some long time gcc-hackers are
1965     still among us, who might remark: Oh yes, that's undefined by the C
1966     Standard, but it happens to be an extension gcc supports ... Seen that,
1967     got the T-shirt.
1968     %%
1969     Subject: Re: Linux and aliasing?
1970     From: Joe Buck <jbuck@Synopsys.COM>
1971     Date: Fri, 4 Jun 99 10:00:16 PDT
1972     To: torvalds@transmeta.com (Linus Torvalds)
1973     Cc: craig@jcb-sc.com, jbuck@Synopsys.COM, mark@codesourcery.com,
1974     davem@redhat.com, chip@perlsupport.com, egcs@egcs.cygnus.com
1975     X-Mailer: ELM [version 2.3 PL11]
1976    
1977     Linus writes, to Craig:
1978    
1979     > I haven't maintained a compiler long-term. I _have_ maintained a larger,
1980     > and arguably mode complex system with many more degrees of freedom and
1981     > thus choices than gcc.
1982    
1983     No, gcc is substantially larger than the Linux kernel (on the order of 10x
1984     larger, as anyone can easily verify). gcc does not need to deal with race
1985     conditions, so in that sense it is simpler, but in other respects it is
1986     far more complex than the kernel.
1987    
1988     [NOTE for the reader: this is not really true, as the device drivers
1989     bomb the comparison away, but the complexity argument still holds]
1990    
1991     [ personal insults deleted, perhaps the author is in need of a vacation ]
1992     %%
1993     Subject: Re: Linux and aliasing?
1994     From: craig@jcb-sc.com
1995     To: torvalds@transmeta.com
1996    
1997     >I want the _user_ to be able to give input.
1998     [...]
1999     >I happen to think that the "explicit cast invalidates the alias
2000     >information" rule is the simplest and best one, and gives the user the
2001     >best control without adding things like new attributes or other ways to
2002     >let the user be in control.
2003    
2004     In other words, you believe you are a better language designer than
2005     the ISO C people as well as the gcc maintainers, despite the fact
2006     that you know, what, *nothing* about language design, and *nothing*
2007     about compiler design and, especially, long-term maintenance of
2008     compilers?
2009     %%
2010     Subject: Re: Linux and aliasing?
2011     From: Joe Buck <jbuck@Synopsys.COM>
2012    
2013     Linus writes:
2014     > Oh, you don't expect me to complain about bad code generation when I know
2015     > gcc could do better?
2016    
2017     Oh, don't worry, we expect you to complain, and in a rude and insulting
2018     matter at that. We're used to it. It seems that you were a nicer guy
2019     before you had so many worshippers.
2020     %%
2021     Subject: Re: Linux and aliasing?
2022     From: Branko Cibej <branko.cibej@hermes.si>
2023     Date: Fri, 04 Jun 1999 10:07:09 +0200
2024     To: egcs@egcs.cygnus.com
2025     X-Mailer: Mozilla 4.6 [en] (WinNT; I)
2026    
2027     Linus Torvalds wrote:
2028    
2029     > I think it's a damn shame that instead of technical arguments _everything_
2030     > revolves around people reading the standard as if it was the bible, and
2031     > trying to make people feel guilty for not really caring. It's not a sin to
2032     > just want to get good code without having to do magic contortions, guys.
2033    
2034     Why, Linus, it's trivial to do! Use MSVC instead of egcs, then you can do
2035    
2036     #pragma optimize("a", on/off)
2037    
2038     around every single statement, if you like. It even supports anonymous unions
2039     _and_ structs, and is only slightly influenced by the ISO C standard.
2040    
2041     They'll even sell you a version that can generate code for the alpha!
2042    
2043     >:->
2044    
2045     Brane
2046    
2047    
2048     P.S.: Just for the record: I, a "real user" and (imnsho) a "clever programmer"
2049     who "know what I'm doing", at least most of the time, and who do not "read the
2050     standard as if it were a bible", vote for having a standard-conforming
2051     compiler that's not bloated by a ton of marginally useful (or even useless)
2052     features. If I want featuritis, I know where I can get it.
2053    
2054    
2055     P.P.S: They can't even spell "optimise" ...
2056     %%
2057     You can have it Soon, Cheap, and Working; choose *two*
2058     %%
2059     "Scientific" studies have found that a 2.2.x Linux router with
2060     fast-switching enabled, using Tulip 100baseT cards, can melt a
2061     high-end Cisco's 100baseT interfaces.
2062     %%
2063     1) Thread switching is faster than process switching by a little bit on Linux
2064     2) Process switching on linux is faster than thread switching on NT
2065     3) Almost anything is faster than process switching on NT
2066     %%
2067     [gimp-developers, on the use of keyboard modifiers for drawing tools]
2068    
2069     > Simple. Powerful. Fast. Choose at most two.
2070    
2071     Perhaps this should be an option in the preferences dialog? :)
2072     %%
2073     [perl is cryptic??]
2074     Subject: @{$${->{{{{~{}~{{{NO CARRIER
2075     From: Jarkko Hietaniemi <jhi@iki.fi>
2076     Date: Mon, 24 May 1999 21:55:37 +0300 (EET DST)
2077    
2078     We have still a long way to go-- from the zsh-workers mailing list:
2079    
2080     : Just thought of a trivial way to take a lot of grief out of parameter
2081     : substitution. This patch makes the following valid:
2082     :
2083     : ${${${${(f)"$(typeset)"}:#*local *\=*}%%\=*}##* }
2084     :
2085     : replacing the equivalent but grotesquer
2086     :
2087     : "${(@)${(@)${(@)${(@f)$(typeset)}:#*local *\=*}%%\=*}##* }"
2088     %%
2089     Long noun chains don't automatically imply security. - Bruce Schneier
2090     %%
2091     > |> Spoken as a true C programmer. However you are wrong. Case-preserving, but
2092     > |> insensitive, is the CORRECT way for file systems. Capitalization should not
2093     > |> matter for interpretation of a file name just as it doesn't matter for
2094     > |> interpreting words in any human language.
2095     >
2096     > This is wrong. In German, there is a big difference between "paar" und
2097     > "Paar" (the first meaning "a few", the second "pair").
2098    
2099     The classic example:
2100    
2101     "Ich habe liebe Genossen in Moskau" - I've got dead comreds in Moscow.
2102     "Ich habe Liebe genossen in Moskau" - I enjoyed love in Moscow.
2103     %%
2104     [do we need oo-style IO::File class in perl?]
2105     >_You_ aren't gonna code "use IO::File".
2106    
2107     And there's no reason for anyone else to, either, especially
2108     once Nick finishes the Larry-blessed autovivification of
2109     lvaluabled undefs in open(), socket(), etc.
2110    
2111     What's next, a String class for Perl?
2112    
2113     --tom
2114     %%
2115     [some example of the kind of mail I sometimes receive:]
2116     i was just trying to help u out not hurt you in anyway ok i have the fbi
2117     working on something for me
2118     u havent done anything to me ok and the sherriffs department came by to talk
2119     to me nutting concerning y ok
2120     piece
2121     russ
2122     %%
2123     [From "Basic Information about Unix", common commands:]
2124    
2125     pico (text editor for beginners)
2126     vi (text editor for advanced users)
2127     emacs (text editor for advanced users)
2128     ed (text editor for beginners)
2129     %%
2130     There is no reason in principle that a Perl script shouldn't start with
2131    
2132     use Python;
2133    
2134     and appear to work exactly like Python from there to the end of the file.
2135     Except maybe faster. :-)
2136    
2137     Larry
2138     %%
2139     > Perl6 gives us an opportunity to re-examine every feature at a microscopic level.
2140    
2141     just what I'm afraid of... I thought this was to be Perl6, not Perl
2142     2010.
2143    
2144     (Perl 2010: The Spaced Oddity?)
2145     %%
2146     The X.25 specification is not a particularly easy document to
2147     read. Contrary to expectations, it does not make great use of diagrams
2148     and tables that help to explain the workings of the protocols that
2149     it contains. Instead the document makes use of many ambiguous English
2150     descriptions of the actions that should take place, allied with a complete
2151     lack of fluency in its prose descriptions, make for a very confusing
2152     document. It is a wonder that any correct X.25 implementations have ever
2153     been created.
2154     %%
2155     > Joe: (walking into McDonalds) Hi, I'd like a Big Mac.
2156     >
2157     > Cashier: Okay, here's your Big Mac and here's your Coke. That'll be
2158     > $3.99.
2159     >
2160     > Joe: Uh, I don't want a Coke.
2161     >
2162     > Cashier: Sorry, they're bundled.
2163     >
2164     > Joe: What? I'm not paying for a Coke!
2165     >
2166     > Cashier: You don't; the Coke is free.
2167     >
2168     > Joe: But wasn't a Big Mac $2.49 last week?
2169     >
2170     > Cashier: Sure, but this latest Big Mac is far more innovative. It's
2171     > got integrated Coke!
2172     >
2173     > Joe: I already bought a Snapple across the street... I'm not going
2174     > to drink the Coke.
2175     >
2176     > Cashier: Then you can't have the burger.
2177     >
2178     > Joe: Okay, fine, I will pay the $3.99 and throw the Coke away.
2179     >
2180     > Cashier: Oh, you can't do that. They're seamlessly integrated. Totally
2181     > inseparable.
2182     >
2183     > Joe: How can that be? They're two totally separate things!
2184     >
2185     > Cashier: No, watch. (takes Big Mac, dunks it in a tank of Coke) See?
2186     >
2187     > Joe: Why did you just do that?!
2188     >
2189     > Cashier: It's a benefit to the consumer. Otherwise you'd end up with
2190     > two different, inconsistent tastes. This way you're assured of a
2191     > continuous taste across all your foods.
2192     %%
2193     Threads are like salt. I like salt, you like salt, we all
2194     like salt, but we eat more pasta than salt.
2195     %%
2196     From: Nathan Torkington <gnat@frii.com>
2197    
2198     Don't be bitten by Perl, get crushed by Python.
2199     Python: Perl for the punctuation-phobic.
2200     It takes 4 days for a python to digest a hamster, but only 2 days
2201     for you to digest this book.
2202     Python: it's really better but nobody uses it.
2203     Python: just for the whitespace of it.
2204     Join The Trickle
2205     Python: more popular than Dylan!
2206     Python: not written by crackheads in a gutter!
2207     Are you uptight? Try our new Python Hangups series.
2208     %%
2209     Well Microsoft announced this new language called COOL which I can
2210     honestly say that I have seen NO CRAPPY CODE written in. OTOH it appears
2211     that to achieve this miraculous status by the simple technique of being
2212     complete and utter vapourware.
2213    
2214     Microsoft, taking the Business out of COBOL.
2215     %%
2216     [From "Programming Perl"]
2217    
2218     We will encourage you to develop the three great virtues of a
2219     programmer: laziness, impatience and hubris
2220     %%
2221     [Alexander Stepanov, creator of the STL]:
2222    
2223     Yes. STL is not object oriented. I think that object orientedness is
2224     almost as much of a hoax as Artificial Intelligence. I have yet to
2225     see an interesting piece of code that comes from these OO people. In
2226     a sense, I am unfair to AI: I learned a lot of stuff from the MIT AI
2227     Lab crowd, they have done some really fundamental work: Bill Gosper's
2228     Hakmem is one of the best things for a programmer to read. AI might
2229     not have had a serious foundation, but it produced Gosper and Stallman
2230     (Emacs), Moses (Macsyma) and Sussman (Scheme, together with Guy Steele). I
2231     find OOP technically unsound. It attempts to decompose the world in
2232     terms of interfaces that vary on a single type. To deal with the real
2233     problems you need multisorted algebras - families of interfaces that
2234     span multiple types. I find OOP philosophically unsound. It claims that
2235     everything is an object. Even if it is true it is not very interesting -
2236     saying that everything is an object is saying nothing at all. I find OOP
2237     methodologically wrong. It starts with classes. It is as if mathematicians
2238     would start with axioms. You do not start with axioms - you start with
2239     proofs. Only when you have found a bunch of related proofs, can you
2240     come up with axioms. You end with axioms. The same thing is true in
2241     programming: you have to start with interesting algorithms. Only when you
2242     understand them well, can you come up with an interface that will let them
2243     work.
2244     [...]
2245     You can't write a generic max() in Java that takes two arguments of some
2246     type and has a return value of that same type. Inheritance and interfaces
2247     don't help. And if they cannot implement max or swap or linear search,
2248     what chances do they have to implement really complex stuff? These are my
2249     litmus tests: if a language allows me to implement max and swap and linear
2250     search generically - then it has some potential.
2251     [...] Java is clearly an example of a money oriented programming (MOP).
2252     It might be successful - after all, MS DOS was - and it might be a
2253     profitable thing for all your readers to learn Java, but it has no
2254     intellectual value whatsoever.
2255    
2256     [Later, on OMG protocols like CORBA]
2257     I am old enough to remember all the networking standards that were coming
2258     out in the seventies. Who remembers them now?
2259     %%
2260     [Stiftung Warentest "test", WDR 19990419:]
2261     "Schlechtes muß nicht billig sein..."
2262     %%
2263     [/bin/false on solaris]
2264     #!/usr/bin/sh
2265     # Copyright (c) 1984, 1986, 1987, 1988, 1989 AT&T
2266     # All Rights Reserved
2267    
2268     # THIS IS UNPUBLISHED PROPRIETARY SOURCE CODE OF AT&T
2269     # The copyright notice above does not evidence any
2270     # actual or intended publication of such source code.
2271    
2272     #ident "@(#)false.sh 1.6 93/01/11 SMI" /* SVr4.0 1.3 */
2273     [obvious invocation of exit snipped to avoid lawsuit. Yup, *1* line.]
2274     %%
2275     <Aspirin> but ee uses imlib, and imlib is documented to take 4.7 days to start up on a 486 by Alan Cox.
2276     %%
2277     When a tar built for SunOS runs under Solaris, it's incapable of opening
2278     or creating files with "lib/locale" in the path. It replaces that part of
2279     the path with "lib/oldlocale".
2280     %%
2281     [Bruce Schneier in CRYPTO-GRAM, 19990315]
2282    
2283     "Microsoft prefers to treat security holes as a public relations problem,
2284     rather than fixing the actual problem."
2285    
2286     [further down: the official answer from Microsoft about a problem where
2287     just viewing a website would invisibly run unrestricted code on your
2288     machine]
2289    
2290     "Microsoft appreciates your input regarding this issue, however in lieu
2291     of modern technology being what it is, we all need to be personally
2292     responsible for knowing what we are downloading off the internet."
2293    
2294     [see http://www.panix.com/~dfoster/sec/chrono.html]
2295     %%
2296     [Steve Funston wrote to me, after I unsubscribed him from gimp-perl for
2297     spamming:]
2298    
2299     >fuck you ass hole duh you are just a big fucker
2300     >>
2301     >>An error was generated by your request to our servers:
2302     >>------------------------------------------------------
2303     >>
2304     >>Your Email: bfunston@mich.com
2305     >>
2306     >>ERROR: You are not a member of this list.
2307    
2308     [and later, misquoting my name:]
2309     >mark is not only a big fat liar but he is an ass hole.
2310     %%
2311     [How much of the microsoft shares does Bill Gates hold?]
2312     He has 19.8%. Paul Allen has 5.5%. Steve Ballmer has 4.7%.
2313     %%
2314     > And what's wrong with being named Peter?
2315     If linus was peter, Linux would be called penix? (just guessing) ;)
2316     %%
2317     According to Microsoft KnowledgeBase article Q216641, Microsoft Windows
2318     95/98 are limited to an uptime of *exactly* 49.7 days.
2319    
2320     --found by Vincent Janelle (Random)
2321     %%
2322     > Leave that to RMS.
2323    
2324     If you had just sat through the horrific panel with Larry,
2325     RMS, Richard, and Linus, you would want to leave a whole lot
2326     else to RMS -- like a couple of megatons of the manure that
2327     he's full of.
2328    
2329     Support BSD/Linux.
2330    
2331     --tom
2332     %%
2333     "The FSF is a cult -- don't support them." --Rob Pike
2334     %%
2335     We are Linux. Resistance is an indication that you missed the point.
2336     %%
2337     > Perhaps the cracker himself (itself? ;) isn't bright enough to delete shell
2338     > history, but his shrink-wrapped cracking tools might be a lot brighter...
2339    
2340     Some of them are. A surprising number aren't. A personal favorite of
2341     mine was the log from a cracker who couldn't figure out how to untar
2342     and install the trojan package he'd ftped onto the machine. he tried a
2343     few times, and then eventually gave up and logged out.
2344     %%
2345     [on channel #gimp]
2346    
2347     [msg(Xachbot)] insult me
2348     [XachBot(xachbot@home.xach.com)] schmorp: David Miller would never approve of that.
2349     %%
2350     [the creation]
2351     http://www.toodarkpark.org/caffeine-cgi-bin/textfile/net-hx.txt
2352     %%
2353     THE LESSER-KNOWN PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES #12: LITHP
2354    
2355     This otherwise unremarkable language is distinguished by the absence of
2356     an "S" in its character set; users must substitute "TH". LITHP is said
2357     to be useful in protheththing lithtth.
2358     %%
2359     Ich zog hier nur einen Pseudoschluss aus dieser sache, den ich nicht
2360     selbst schliesse.
2361     Norbert Harry Marzahn, selbsternannter "Judaaer"
2362     am 13.12.98 in de.alt.ufo
2363     %%
2364     According to Gurusamy Sarathy:
2365     > "Resistance is futile, you will be modularized."
2366    
2367     No:
2368    
2369     use Borg;
2370     make_threat(-type => 'standard', -doom => 'modularized');
2371    
2372     --
2373     Chip Salzenberg - a.k.a. - <chip@perlsupport.com>
2374     %%
2375     "And over here, ladies and gentlemen, may I draw your attention to
2376     the 'posicks box', a mechanism within one of the late 20th century
2377     sub-I hardware gestalt integration agents (then called 'operating
2378     systems', this particular one being referred to as 'windows' by
2379     its commercial-mimetic sustainer), designed so as to provide the
2380     appearance and functionality required to comply with one of the few
2381     agreed-upon integration schemas (sub-I, of course) available at the
2382     time. Unsurprising given the non-integration imperitives used by the
2383     agent's sustainter, this mechanism was demonstrated to be an ingenious
2384     non-integration ploy that, while supporting the integration schema,
2385     failed to support the local interconnect schemas that this agent
2386     specialized in. This produced a classic focus rift in the knowledge
2387     pool, benefiting the sustainer in the short run due to the focus
2388     concentration facilities available to commericial-class mimetic
2389     sustainers. Practically, this wasn't a significant loss, in the long
2390     run, as neither the 'windows' or 'posicks' schemas were relevant to
2391     modern quasi-I agents. These two do live on, however, in a few niches.
2392     'posicks' is used as the integration schema between most nano-scale
2393     logic units (a fact that only a few meta-experts still need to be
2394     aware of), and 'windows' survives, for religious-mimetic reasons, as
2395     the human-communication agent in a few stereotypical toasters and soap
2396     dispensers."
2397    
2398     [Kenneth Albanowski]
2399     %%
2400     Perl ist ein Schmerzmittel.
2401     Wenn Du bei der Speicherverwaltung oder der Stringverarbeitung
2402     unter C Schmerzen hast, nimm Perl.
2403     -- Kristian Koehntopp
2404     %%
2405     > Why Windows NT Server 4.0 continues to exist in the enterprise would be a
2406     > topic appropriate for an investigative report in the field of psychology or
2407     > marketing, not an article on information technology -- John Kirch
2408     %%
2409     [bei einer mündlichen Nachprüfung in BWL, Uni Hamburg]
2410    
2411     Prof: "Was ist Agio?"
2412     Student: "Weiß ich nicht."
2413     Prof: "OK, durchgefallen!
2414     Student: "Ich habe aber Anspruch auf drei Fragen in der mündlichen Prüfung!"
2415     Prof: "Klar, was ist Disagio?"
2416     Student: "..."
2417     Prof: "...und was ist der Unterschied zwischen Agio und Disagio?"
2418     Student: "..."
2419     Prof: "...durchgefallen!"
2420     %%
2421     Chaim Frenkel <chaimf@pobox.com> writes:
2422    
2423     > Just morbid curiosity,
2424     >
2425     > Are there _any_ unix boxes that _can't_ build Perl?
2426    
2427     Yes. Broken ones.
2428    
2429     dgris
2430     %%
2431     "The kerastion is a musical instrument which cannot be heard."
2432     -- A Borges story in ten words.
2433     %%
2434     "C combines the power of assembly language
2435     with the flexibility of assembly language."
2436     %%
2437     ...
2438    
2439     <AOL>
2440    
2441     Me too!
2442    
2443     </AOL>
2444    
2445     Tig
2446     %%
2447     ping -p 2b2b2b415448300d <hostname>
2448     %%
2449     unzip;strip;touch;finger;mount;fsck;more;yes;umount;sleep
2450     %%
2451     From: Dick Balaska <dick@buckosoft.com>
2452    
2453     I sit behind an NT dual P2/400 256MB for too many hours each day. It is
2454     "slow". One of my (fun) tasks is CD mastering. When i'm loading a 500MB
2455     wav file into the editor, the machine goes useless for two minutes while
2456     loading the wave file. Basically its just reading the file and writing it
2457     to swap. The CPU is at 5%. No Alt-Tab between apps during that time. No
2458     chance of putting the mouse over a button (too many dropped ticks). The
2459     NT kernel is just sitting waiting for I/O completions.
2460    
2461     Linux would be embarrassed to be that bad.
2462    
2463     I expected M$ to never fix this because its not "broken". However, i
2464     expect billg to start reading the above mentioned literal benchmarks and
2465     get really really pissed.
2466    
2467     Especially since i believe 1999 and 2000 to see Linux *really* start
2468     to cut into M$'s server market share.
2469     %%
2470     > Hello I'm wondering if there's a lower traffic mailing list that exists
2471     > that's strictly important kernel announcements and not general chat. I
2472     > need to stay informed but I can't handle 250 messages in a 24 hour
2473     > period.
2474     >
2475     > Sorry for the insignificant post..
2476     > Nic
2477     >
2478    
2479     Thank you for contributing to the problem.
2480    
2481     -hpa
2482     %%
2483     grep... grep... grep... (frog with unix stuck in his throat)
2484     %%
2485     "If users are made to understand that the system administrator's job is to
2486     make computers run, and not to make them happy, they can, in fact, be made
2487     happy most of the time. If users are allowed to believe that the system
2488     administrator's job is to make them happy, they can, in fact, never be made
2489     happy."
2490     - - -Paul Evans (as quoted by Barb Dijker in "Managing Support Staff", LISA '97)
2491     %%
2492     From: "Daniel P. Stasinski" <dannys@KAREMOR.COM>
2493     Subject: Microsoft Hotmail
2494     To: BUGTRAQ@NETSPACE.ORG
2495    
2496     I contacted Microsoft/Hotmail asking them to close the account
2497     of that was listed in the backdoored tcp wrapper source code.
2498     I also forwarded the offending code.
2499    
2500     The word back from them is that they will not close it. Theft
2501     of passwords and hacking does not violate thier terms of
2502     service.
2503    
2504     Daniel
2505     %%
2506     Any UNIX-killer must also have:
2507     ...
2508     * cool name like Linux (serious, these fail: GNU Hurd FreeBSD 386BSD)
2509     %%
2510     "Not all things worth doing are worth doing well."
2511     It's a phrase I use a lot. :-)
2512     [RJL]
2513     %%
2514     As John Whittaker says: ``It's UNIX. That doesn't necessarily mean it's
2515     right.''
2516     %%
2517     [Richard Stallman on the new _Pragma operator in C9X:]
2518    
2519     Amazing--they actually listened.
2520     %%
2521     That "UNIX" term is very negative. People often associate it with
2522     SCO OpenServer, Wyse terminals, and 60 people on a 386. The UNIX
2523     that people know is just awful. It looks something like this:
2524    
2525     # less foo
2526     sh: command not found
2527     # more foo
2528     sh: command not found
2529     # emacs foo
2530     sh: command not found
2531     # ed foo
2532     0
2533     help
2534     ?
2535     quit
2536     ?
2537     exit
2538     ?
2539     DIE!!!!!!!!!!
2540     ?
2541    
2542     [Albert D. Cahalan]
2543     %%
2544     Subject: Re: Stop blib warning in future releases?
2545     From: andreas.koenig@anima.de (Andreas J. Koenig)
2546     Date: 05 Jan 1999 03:15:37 +0100
2547    
2548     tim> Sure. Strictly speaking
2549    
2550     tim> use blib ':quiet';
2551    
2552     tim> would be most correct in style.
2553    
2554     Only German native speakers are allowed to treat adverbs adjectively.
2555     For the rest I'd recommend [...]
2556     %%
2557     [A new U.S. Law implementing a WIPO treaty]
2558     No person shall circumvent a technological protection measure that
2559     effectively controls access to a work protected under this title
2560     [Or, in other words, applied cryptanalysis will be illegal.
2561     too bad --- ]
2562     %%
2563     Microsoft - Is it going to work today?
2564     %%
2565     Subject: Re: [gimp-devel] GIF plugin legal issues
2566    
2567     > Actually, my understanding is that Unisys doesn't currently enforce the
2568     > licensing cost on free software, but maybe I am mistaken.
2569    
2570     The general wording, spoken by an unnamed GIMP developer, is, if you'll
2571     pardon the language, "Unisys can go fuck itself."
2572     %%
2573     [once on linux-kernel:]
2574     > >who are you why on yahoo when iprint sf16fmi i fond you i need drv
2575     > Does anyone have the secret decoder ring to make sense of this?
2576     he's confused about us showing up in a search match on yahoo, but needs
2577     driver(s) for his sf16fmi thingy.
2578     %%
2579     > Did you try to compile kdeadmin from the CVS tree ?
2580    
2581     No I ran the KDE binaries. Im not interested in broken programs that
2582     include wrong #include files in their source.
2583     %%
2584     [unix-faq]
2585    
2586     Someday, you are going to accidentally type something like
2587     "rm * .foo", and find you just deleted "*" instead of "*.foo".
2588     Consider it a rite of passage.
2589     %%
2590     "There's one word that strikes fear into nuclear scientists..."
2591     "Oops."
2592     -- MST3K
2593     %%
2594     Seems like 80-bit spills would be closer to IEEE, if not close enough to
2595     claim full support. Off-hand I'd say people would be happier with
2596     those numeric properties than with the current situation.
2597    
2598     I'll think about the esoterica (probably break down and ask people here).
2599     It would certainly make gcc the most reliable x86 floating-point compiler
2600     I know. Sun's does something similar to -ffloat-store by default (gee,
2601     look at how fast that ultra is), and Microsoft's runs off the end of the
2602     stack at run-time . I don't know what Intel's does, so I'm not considering
2603     it. ;)
2604     %%
2605     >I was using the localtime function to change time_t into it's various
2606     >human-readable parts. I noticed that $year gets returned as 98 and
2607     >not 1998. I tested a few different unices and got the same result.
2608     >This is expected behavior based on the examples I've seen and my own
2609     >testing. My question is how is this y2k compliant?
2610    
2611     What part of your C library's documentation on localtime(3), the perlfunc
2612     documentation on the Perl localtime function, the perlfaq4 entry on `Does
2613     Perl have a year 2000 problem?', and the Y2K document on www.perl.com
2614     did you find to be unclear on the answer to this question?
2615    
2616     --tom
2617     %%
2618     > * Have you ever wondered how life began ?
2619    
2620     In a laboratory somewhere at Bell Labs.
2621    
2622     >Why does it end ?
2623    
2624     Ask the X3J11 committee.
2625    
2626     > * Can you tell WHY there is life ? What is the purpose of it ?
2627     > * Can YOU do anything to make your life worth living ? WHAT ?
2628    
2629     To promote the the DEATH OF ANSI C! K+R FOREVER! DOWN WITH PORTABILITY!
2630     %%
2631     "Unix *is* Perl's IDE!"
2632     -- Tom Christiansen
2633     %%
2634     [Sputnik]
2635    
2636     Do you honestly think the Americans would mention a Soviet success? :-)
2637     A number of years back I saw an exhibition in the US on the development of
2638     supersonic passenger aircraft. They forgot to mention Concorde. It
2639     wouldn't surprise me in the least if most people at NASA had never heard
2640     of Sputnik.
2641     %%
2642     NTFS by default adds unnecessary serialization to an extent that
2643     even older file systems such as FFS do not, and its performance
2644     characteristics reflect that. In fairness, it should be said that it is
2645     the superior approach for most removable media without software control
2646     of ejection (e.g. IBM PC floppies).
2647     %%
2648     Never attribute to malice what could as well be explained by stupidity.
2649     - Hanlons razor -
2650     %%
2651     Shallit's Razor: Never attribute to conspiracy what may be adequately
2652     explained by stupidity or incompetence.
2653     %%
2654     According to Chris Nandor:
2655     > I thought about creating a web interface to input, edit, delete entries,
2656     > but that would have taken me longer, been more complex and less secure, and
2657     > offered no significant advantages.
2658    
2659     That one's in the quotes file. Thanks.
2660     %%
2661     My friend who had a Compaq called one day when his built-in cdrom drive
2662     stopped responding. Their answer "its a virus. Reinstal Windows". So he did
2663     (?) and it still didn't work. He called them and they said "its a virus,
2664     reinstall." "But I just installed. If there is a virus, it came from YOUR
2665     quick restore disk." "No, no virus there, but you DO have a virus. My paper
2666     in front of me says so."
2667    
2668     He took it back and bought a Gateway.
2669     %%
2670     9. Deinde, ne in posterum a XII kalendas aprilis aequinoctium recedat,
2671     statuimus bissextum quarto quoque anno (uti mos est) continuari debere,
2672     praeterquam in centesimis annis; qui, quamvis bissextiles antea semper
2673     fuerint, qualem etiam esse volumus annum MDC, post eum tamen qui
2674     deinceps consequentur centesimi non omnes bissextiles sint, sed in
2675     quadringentis quibusque annis primi quique tres centesimi sine bissexto
2676     transigantur, quartus vero quisque centesimus bissextilis sit, ita ut
2677     annus MDCC, MDCCC, MDCCCC bissextiles non sint. Anno vero MM, more
2678     consueto dies bissextus intercaletur, februario dies XXIX continente,
2679     idemque ordo intermittendi intercalandique bissextum diem in
2680     quadringentis quibusque annis perpetuo conservetur.
2681     %%
2682     You obviously have not dealt with Microsoft Winnt 4.0
2683     and all the Service Pack then. While one Service Pack
2684     did somewhat correct the Y2K problem was not aware that
2685     2000 was in fact a leap year. There was no way to set
2686     the date to Feb 29, 2000.
2687     %%
2688     "Ernst Lehmann, die Organisationsredundanz beim Cluster-Treffen"
2689     %%
2690     HP Computer NEWS 3/98 about HP 2000/CN printer (page 24): "Darüber
2691     hinaus ... hat der HP 2000C/CN durch den Einsatz von Intel MMX-
2692     Technologie Zugriff auf deren Farbtabellen und kann so Farbbilder
2693     schneller verarbeiten" (A mistake made when translating. It's hard to
2694     get the wrong meaning if translated back to English, sorry.)
2695     %%
2696     From: Robert Lipe
2697     > > I program computers with no screens and no keyboards for a living.
2698     > > Switches and front-panels are a LUXURY! :-)
2699     >
2700     > But I guess you are not _programming_ these computers without a keyboard
2701     > and/or screen.
2702    
2703     Are you familiar with the Vulcan Mind Meld?
2704     %%
2705     Subject: Re: [fwd from comp.lang.python] Re: Python 2 ideas [Re: access
2706     From: Tuomas Lukka <lukka@fas.harvard.edu>
2707    
2708     On Tue, 24 Nov 1998, Ilya Zakharevich wrote:
2709     > use pedantic;
2710     > use strict 'code';
2711     >
2712     > or whatever is the syntax to switch Perl into 'dull'/'pythonish' mode.
2713    
2714     use syntax 'python';
2715    
2716     Let's just embrace&extend'em ;) ;)
2717    
2718     %%
2719     Thus it was written in the epistle of Larry Wall,
2720     >
2721     > Having discussed all this thoroughly at the Hacker's Conference this
2722     > past weekend, I've come to the conclusion that Y2K will be traumatic
2723     > primarily because people *think* it will be traumatic. A panic is a
2724     > panic whether or not it's justified. People get trampled in panics.
2725     >
2726     > It should be illegal to yell "Y2K" in a crowded economy. :-)
2727     %%
2728     [rfc1925]
2729     Good, Fast, Cheap: Pick any two (you can't have all three).
2730     %%
2731     [Alan Cox, why not port hurd to sgi, instead of linux]
2732     > A possible minus is the message-passing between the servers which might
2733     > be time-consuming.
2734    
2735     "Yesterdays technology, next week" to quote an OSI saying
2736     %%
2737     UNIX versions of ctags handle the C language, and often Pascal and Fortran
2738     77. Sometimes, they even handle assembly language. Almost universally,
2739     however, they do not handle C++...
2740     [from "learning the vi editor"]
2741     %%
2742     > correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't there a thread about this a few
2743     > months back that resolved the ping -f localhost as a ping bug.
2744    
2745     Indeed, as Alan Cox said:
2746    
2747     So get a non-buggy ping(8) client.
2748    
2749     and as Ecclesiastes said:
2750    
2751     Is there any thing whereof it may be said, See, this is new? it hath been
2752     already of old time, which was before us.
2753     There is no remembrance of former things; neither shall there be any
2754     remembrance of things that are to come with those that shall come after.
2755    
2756     Regards,
2757     Tigran.
2758     %%
2759     SNMP stands for Security Not My Problem
2760     %%
2761     [slightly broken, though...]
2762     /* "Hello World" in B for 64-bit hardware! */
2763     hw [0] "Hello World.*n";
2764     main(){
2765     extrn hw;
2766     putchar(0[hw]);
2767     hw=+1;
2768     putchar(0[hw]);
2769     }
2770     %%
2771     > So what comes first the chicken or the egg? :)
2772    
2773     The egg. Always. By definition.
2774     %%
2775     > > PPS: Robert, I just made my first y2k fix to that script ;()
2776     >
2777     > Better check your scsi cables.
2778     %%
2779     Arroganz durch Wissen
2780     [Dirk Jagdmann]
2781     %%
2782     [Re: Pegasus - Gut oder Boese?]
2783     > Weil er sie dabei ja unterstuetzt. Da er aber (abgesehen von den ersten
2784     > ein- oder zweimal) nur auf Anrufen von Rosa-Girl erscheint, koennte man es
2785     > auch anders herum sagen. wenn CU Pfeift, kommt er angaloppiert 8))
2786    
2787     was aber leider bedeutet, daß usa die Rennsemmel ständig mit
2788     sich rumschleppen mu?. ^_-
2789     Nur weil die Kleine die Bimmel hat!
2790    
2791     Und wer weiß, was dieses pädophile Pferd eigentlich noch so
2792     bezwecken will... ^_-
2793     %%
2794     >James :\
2795     >
2796     >I apologize for adding a message to this possibly trivial thread.
2797    
2798     I like your sig. I hope you use it for everything you post.
2799     %%
2800     From: Mason <mason@schwanda.resnet.tamu.edu>
2801     Subject: night of the undead ip stack
2802     Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1998 13:03:19 -0600 (CST)
2803     %%
2804     > The person who decides to invent UNICODE support for Linux
2805     > is just asking for a black eye.
2806    
2807     But Unicode for NT is such fun!
2808    
2809     For example, the checked DbgPrint() bluescreens above DISPATCH_LEVEL
2810     if you try to print a Unicode string--the Unicode->ASCII
2811     translation tables are marked as pageable.
2812    
2813     Since as far as I know, printk() does not have any format specifiers
2814     that cause obscure kernel panics, Linux is clearly behind in this
2815     area.
2816     %%
2817     Linux: a no problem operating system for no problem people.
2818     [Lukas Grunwald]
2819     %%
2820     http://dd.sh/perlfs/:
2821    
2822     THIS IS AN EXPERIMENTAL (PRE-ALPHA) VERSION OF THE PERL FILESYSTEM.
2823     EVEN WHEN IT LOADS WITHOUT CAUSING A KERNEL PANIC, IT WILL LOCK UP
2824     YOUR MACHINE, DESTROY ALL YOUR DATA, KIDNAP YOUR FAMILY AND
2825     (DEPENDING ON SAID FAMILY'S CONFIGURATION) SHOOT YOUR CAT, DOG, AND/OR
2826     FIRST-BORN CHILD.
2827     %%
2828     [a comment on http://dd.sh/perlfs/]
2829     Forget GNU/Linux. /PerL/inux will conquer all.
2830    
2831     kill 0,1 if -x '/PerL/inux'; # request kernel mode
2832     %%
2833     [Tim Hollebeek on real arithmetic]
2834     On a machine with a sane floating point model, the results make sense.
2835     For example, my SGI workstation prints:
2836    
2837     0.00000000000000011102 1.00000000000000000000 1.00000000000000020000 1.00000000000000040000
2838    
2839     However, a machine with the Intel FPU from hell gives:
2840    
2841     0.00000000000000000005 1.00000000000000000000 1.00000000000000000000 1.00000000000000000000
2842    
2843     due to the fact that whether 1+x and 1 are the same number depends on whether
2844     the numbers are in the FPU or not.
2845     %%
2846     [Grüner Tip/Arte]
2847     Ihre Nachbarn sind zu laut und feiern andauernd Parties? Kein Problem, ihr
2848     Bohrer wird nachts um zwei spielend mit _jedem_ Lärm fertig....
2849     %%
2850     Remember, eating healthy doesn't make you live longer, it just makes it seem
2851     longer...
2852     %%
2853     [M$ about unix development tools like GCC]
2854     By the standards of the novice / intermediate developer accustomed to
2855     VB/VS/VC/VJ, these tools are incredibly primitive.
2856     %%
2857     > > Praha is nice and our university is interesting, since it is according
2858     > > to tests most complex and impractical computer science university on the
2859     > > world :) I just love it...
2860     >
2861     > Oh well, great that I won't be studying there...
2862     >
2863     It is really fun.... just now I have lesson (that reminds me that I really
2864     should go now) about set theory and infinity... it is really fun and very
2865     practical...
2866     for example that you have cinema with infinity chairs and infinity plus one
2867     person wants to see movie... what do yo do?
2868     Just let sit down the first infinity persons and then last person ask first
2869     one to move to second chair, second one to move to third and so on and
2870     everyone fits.. isn't that great to know? :))
2871    
2872     Jan Hubicka
2873     %%
2874     > template< template< template<class> class > class Tmpl> A {};
2875     [...]
2876     > I think that this construction is allowed by the ANSI C++.
2877    
2878     No, it is not. What you meant is
2879    
2880     template< template< template<class> class > class Tmpl> class A {};
2881     %%
2882     Jan Dubois writes:
2883     > A) perl-5.00553
2884     > path = \perl\5.00553\bin\MsWin32-x86\perl.exe
2885     > cc = cl.exe
2886     A performance analysis compiling with M$ compiler? Get real!
2887    
2888     [...]
2889    
2890     Ilya
2891     %%
2892     >Shouldn't the kernel compile with all combinations of options.
2893    
2894     Yes. Feel free to fix it and send a patch.
2895    
2896     p.
2897     %%
2898     [tomc]
2899     Jean-Louis provides four arguments in favor of the overloading of the
2900     logical && and || operators. Here they are:
2901    
2902     +------------------------------------------+
2903     | Other languages, notably C++, permit it. |
2904     +------------------------------------------+
2905    
2906     This one is hardly persuasive. Many languages do innumerable things
2907     that Perl does not do. Just for example, take:
2908    
2909     * Csh reparses and re-evals interpolated strings, allowing something
2910     like C<$cmd $var> to do interesting things.
2911     * The Fortran lexer (as it were), having no need of white space to
2912     infer tokens, allows C<DO I=1.10> and C<DO I=1,10> to coexist in an
2913     interesting way.
2914     * Icon has an entirely different notion of success and failure,
2915     allowing expressions like (X < Y < Z) to do interesting things.
2916     * Scheme has call-with-continuation, allowing co-routines to do
2917     interesting things.
2918     * C++ has template classes with abnormal typing rules even for that
2919     language, allowing parameterized meta-classes to do interesting
2920     things.
2921     %%
2922     Make is like Pascal: everybody likes it, so they go in and change it.
2923     --Dennis Ritchie
2924     %%
2925     perl -wlpe '}{$_=$.' file # Count the number of lines.
2926     %%
2927     [not quite duff's device, but...]
2928    
2929     switch (x)
2930     default:
2931     if (prime(x))
2932     case 2: case 3: case 5: case 7:
2933     process_prime(x);
2934     else
2935     case 4: case 6: case 8: case 9: case 10:
2936     process_composite(x);
2937     %%
2938     Is there any truth to the rumor that the number appearing
2939     after the words "Microsoft Windows" is the minimum amount of memory,
2940     in megabytes, required for execution?
2941    
2942     Craig Milo Rogers
2943     %%
2944     Mark Mielke writes:
2945     > This statement is false. The simple fact that school textbooks teach it
2946     > to be indeterminate should be enough to convince you of that.
2947    
2948     This is just another reference point about the state of education in
2949     US (apparently in Canada too?).
2950    
2951     Ilya
2952     %%
2953     [from p5p]
2954     > Now you know why threading is experimental and all, buddy.
2955    
2956     Experimental schexperimental. Anything that doesn't cause an
2957     immediate coredump is not experimental. :-) (Observant readers will
2958     note that this is a more rigorous standard than Microsoft's.)
2959    
2960     Nat
2961     %%
2962     Needless to say, Linux awk is probably gawk, which has been taking too
2963     much steroids for a while. =)
2964    
2965     --Albert Dvornik
2966     <bert@genscan.com>
2967     %%
2968     Subject: Re: zero width lookbehind considered slow
2969     From: Tom Christiansen <tchrist@jhereg.perl.com>
2970     Date: Thu, 22 Oct 1998 17:40:37 -0500
2971    
2972     >*You* do not understand? Perl is slow...
2973    
2974     Ilya: You are formerly invited to go play in the python
2975     or tcl crowd instead of here.
2976    
2977     --tom
2978     %%
2979     >What's it? Can linux be improved too? Or has it already been improved?
2980    
2981     Linux has never done anything so stupid in the first place.
2982    
2983     Linus
2984     %%
2985     On the 8th day god created email. And got noted the world was good. Then the
2986     devil added HTML mail...
2987     %%
2988     linux/lib/vsprintf.c: * Wirzenius wrote this portably, Torvalds fucked it up :-)
2989     linux/arch/sparc64/kernel/binfmt_aout32.c: /* Fuck me plenty... */
2990     linux/arch/sparc64/kernel/ptrace.c:/* Fuck me gently with a chainsaw... */
2991     %%
2992     On 1998-10-11T02:37:57,
2993     Alan Cox <alan@lxorguk.ukuu.org.uk> said:
2994    
2995     > Believe me Microsoft think Linux is a threat now. Its level with things like
2996     > java in their perceived threat list, so you can expect all the usual MS
2997     > techniques to start coming this way and very soon.
2998    
2999     Arm the gnus!
3000     %%
3001     [David Miller after (another) endless discussion with Richard Kenner]
3002    
3003     Anyways, I tired (just like everyone else) of arguing endlessly with
3004     you, you're in the past, you no longer constrain my ability to improve
3005     gcc, so go away.
3006     %%
3007     I received my copy of Visual Studio 6.0 today. I couldn't believe that it
3008     wanted to install the C++ compiler into a directory called:
3009    
3010     "\Program Files\Microsoft Visual Studio\VC98"
3011    
3012     But anyways, I just had to find out if it was finally possible to compile
3013     Perl (without PERL_OBJECT) with optimization (-O2).
3014     %%
3015     [on perl version numbering]
3016     > So it could be 5.006 for the developers, but "ThreadPerl" or "Perl with
3017     > Multithreads" (or some such) for the journalists, if that's what
3018     > journalists need to make them pay attention.
3019    
3020     Down that path lies "Perl version 5.006, codename `Ticklish Uvula',
3021     was released today" madness.
3022     %%
3023     [on perl version numbering]
3024     > elaine> 5.1 would be a good thing(tm) as it would draw attention,
3025     > elaine> etc. in a way that a developers versioning would. The
3026     > elaine> world is not populated by people who think the same
3027     > elaine> way. To that end, this would be a good change. Of course,
3028     > elaine> we could call it Perl99.
3029     >
3030     > To me, Perl seems to be recognized for it's language qualities, not
3031     > for marketing reasons. IMHO, perl may keep this difference with other
3032     > wintel product. More than that : Perl99, would let believe people that
3033     > it is not Y2K proofed, or still in beta (<1.00). So it's not a good
3034     > marketing name, anyway.
3035    
3036     Right. Then, to be Y2K compliant, we'll have to call it Perl1999. Hmmm.
3037     "The year perl left earth's orbit"? Maybe we need to get the NASA guys to
3038     put perl on the next low-cost spaceshot.
3039    
3040     Of course, then c.l.p.m's motto could be "We do not commit *mindless*
3041     violence..." :-)
3042     %%
3043     Rule 1 says that Larry says that Larry has the last say, unless he changes
3044     his mind in which case he still has the last say.
3045     %%
3046     > >I never said it did.. I should have said: Binary only drivers encourage
3047     > >poor drivers
3048     >
3049     > No it doesn't.
3050    
3051     Indeed. Its down to
3052    
3053     Profit = (units * margin) - overhead
3054    
3055     and the folks who decide "overhead" arent the programmers but the management.
3056     The folks who say "you have two weeks allocated to write this driver, then
3057     we ship it" are the folks to take the issue up with, and that goes source
3058     or binaries.
3059     %%
3060     dig txt leap.yp.to
3061     %%
3062     "The fact that I'm paranoid doesn't mean that nobody's after me..."
3063     %%
3064     [linux-kernel on endianess issues with NIPQUAD]
3065    
3066     |> Do I read this correct?!? Is it more acceptable to have a bug[*],
3067     |> than a not optimal fix?!?!?
3068     |>
3069     |> s/optimal/stupid/
3070    
3071     What's stupid is little endian. <g>
3072    
3073     Andreas.
3074     %%
3075     [Paul Eggert on tz@elsie.nci.nih.gov]
3076     ...
3077     A closely related question is `What is 1 minute before 23:59:60?''.
3078    
3079     Here's a good one: `What is 1 month before 1 February 1995 in
3080     Kiritimati?''. There was no 1 January 1995 in Kiritimati; they
3081     skipped a day by moving the clocks ahead 24 hours. Similar issues
3082     arise when asking about times that occur within smaller, more typical
3083     UTC offset changes. A number of obscure questions arise here, and I'm
3084     not sure it's worth standardizing all the answers.
3085     %%
3086     [D.J.Bernstein on tz@elsie.nci.nih.gov]
3087    
3088     Paul Eggert writes:
3089     > which I am calling the `modified TIME_TAI''
3090    
3091     Your time differences break down near leap seconds. Ever watched xntpd
3092     try to handle a leap second? Wobble, wobble, wobble, wobble, wobble.
3093     %%
3094     For binary only drivers you can assume most vendors will build x86 only
3095     however.
3096    
3097     "We don't have the tools"
3098     "We can't support a non intel build"
3099     "We don't have that sort of machine"
3100     "Its not worth the time cost"
3101     "Whats an Alpha ?"
3102     %%
3103     On Thu, 1 Oct 1998, Mail Delivery Subsystem wrote:
3104    
3105     > The original message was received at Thu, 1 Oct 1998 18:39:56 -0400
3106     > from mini [10.0.0.3]
3107     >
3108     > ----- The following addresses had permanent fatal errors -----
3109     > <mailproc@fred>
3110     >
3111     > ----- Transcript of session follows -----
3112     > procmail: can't map '/lib/libc.so.5'
3113     > procmail: can't map '/lib/libc.so.5'
3114     > procmail: can't load library 'libc.so.5'
3115     > 554 <mailproc@fred>... unknown mailer error 16
3116     %%
3117     > Here is the difficulty with this discussion:
3118     > No documented problem
3119     > No reason to believe that the "solution" solves the unspecified "problem"
3120     > No clear understanding of the effects of this change on the system
3121     >
3122     > Why, this could be a discusion among AIX developers!
3123     %%
3124     > This would be a reasonable committee-like compromise that might
3125     > satisfy neither of us (:-).
3126     %%
3127     By default Microsoft has set Explorer to use gz files as VRML, you need to
3128     change the association for .gz / vrml from "start vrml program" to "always ask"
3129    
3130     dave
3131     %%
3132     On 10 Aug 1998, Ben Pfaff wrote:
3133     DG> You're not programming MS-DOS applications are you?
3134    
3135     BP> Hell no. I wouldn't touch MS-DOS with a ten-foot network cable.
3136     %%
3137     [Paul Eggert on tz@elsie.nci.nih.gov]
3138    
3139     Date: 10 Oct 1998 15:35:05 -0000
3140     From: "D. J. Bernstein" <djb@cr.yp.to>
3141    
3142     Paul Eggert writes:
3143     > * 29 February if it's a leap lear, 28 February otherwise.
3144    
3145     If that's 1 month before 31 March, then what's 1 month before 30 March?
3146     1 month before 29 March?
3147    
3148     The same as 1 month before 31 March.
3149    
3150     1 month before 28 March?
3151    
3152     28 February.
3153    
3154     And what's 1 month after 28 February? 1 month after 27 February? 1 month
3155     _before_ 27 February?
3156    
3157     28 March, 27 March, and 27 January.
3158     %%
3159     Newsgroups: comp.lang.c
3160    
3161     >Nils Goesche wrote:
3162     >> So make a security check first:
3163     >>
3164     >> if (status = UNDER_NUCLEAR_ATTACK)
3165     >> launch_full_counterstrike();
3166     >
3167     >Hmmm. The way the worlds been going lately, AI wouldn't trust that code to
3168     >do the job. Here's the revised version:
3169     >
3170     >if(status == UNDER_NULEAR_ATTACK); /* Corrected dangerous
3171     > = instead of == error*/
3172     > launch_full_counterstrike();
3173     >
3174     >Now isn't that much more reliable?
3175     >
3176     >--
3177     >Email: cyrand@hotmail.com
3178    
3179     The following variant is less reliable but much safer:
3180    
3181     if (status == UNDER_NUCLEAR_ATTACK); /* Correct dangerous
3182     launch_full_counterstrike (); = instead == error */
3183     %%
3184     It is even more cheerful than that. Not so long time ago a customers
3185     of ours totally destroyed his NT installation on Alpha.
3186    
3187     He found on a manufacturer page, no money - for a download, "NT driver"
3188     for his particular piece of a hardware. So he followed instructions
3189     to the letter - "Installation Wizzard" and all that crap - and the thing
3190     happily installed clobbering, as it is customary in these circles,
3191     essential system libraries with its own versions. The catch was that
3192     this driver was for NT/Intel and these bozos did not even bother to
3193     check for an architecture or at least mention something in some blurb.
3194     Ooops! No chance even to try to boot anymore.
3195    
3196     The saving grace was that the installation was rather new, so loses
3197     were not big, and he had an opportunity to practice an essential skill
3198     of re-installing Windows NT. Ah, and yes, this was the only NT driver
3199     available for that hardware from any source.
3200     What do you plan on doing? Using a PA system for networking? :)
3201     Whats next? A *Smell* modem? It would bring a new meaning to packet
3202     sniffing!
3203     %%
3204     "I'd rather spend 10 hours reading source code than 10 minutes on a
3205     technical support line that isn't"
3206     %%
3207     [from linux-kernel]
3208     `This code fills 8 million seats, we therefore decide what's standard.''
3209     %%
3210     [...]
3211     And especially with new machines users have a lot of clout. Several UK
3212     suppliers now carry Buslogic cards partly because they got fed up of
3213    
3214     "I'd like to order a dual PII/300, 256Mb of RAM, 17" monitor
3215     4 4Gig IBM disks, and a buslogic scsi controller"
3216     "We dont do buslogic only adaptec"
3217     "Nothing else"
3218     "Sorry"
3219     [Click]
3220    
3221     Alan
3222     %%
3223     Fünfzig Prozent der Amerikaner wurden in ihrer Kindheit sexuell mißbraucht,
3224     während weitere fünfzig Prozent von Außerirdischen entführt wurden.
3225     %%
3226     > Let's not forget that this is just an informal, free
3227     > software project. Unlke the US House of Representatives
3228     > we do not yet posess nuclear capability (certain RTEMS
3229     > users excepted, of course!).
3230    
3231     Hmmm, if some RTEMS users have nuclear facilities attached to their
3232     systems, they might be well advised to be careful using FORTRAN as
3233     their language of choice. The comp.lang.fortran FAQ states (with
3234     concurrence from resident X3J3 members) that "using a non-standard
3235     construct might start WW III, if the necessary (optional) hardware
3236     is installed"
3237    
3238     [Toon Moene in private discussion]
3239     %%
3240     Newsgroups: alt.config
3241    
3242     L. Harris wrote:
3243     >
3244     > Testing
3245    
3246     you failed.
3247     %%
3248     Roswell {Unit 6 of 5 Sam Borg} Coverup [Rev. joWazzoo - well mannered despammer]
3249     <JOWazzoo@WhiteICE.com> at We are Sam Borg Spam Assimilators Ltd. - Area 51 HQ
3250     %%
3251     Perl is really designed more for the guys that will hack Perl at least
3252     20 minutes a day for the rest of their career. TCL/Python is more a
3253     "20 minutes a week", and VB is probably in that "20 minutes a month"
3254     group. :) -- Randal Schwartz
3255     %%
3256     > alternative, when it comes to stability and power...Not to mention the
3257     > fact that bugs and fixes are very quickly available and don't come in
3258     > 18MB+ "Service Packs" :).
3259    
3260     What, you mean you _paid_ for service pack '98?
3261     %%
3262     We got this INTERNET because we whan't more information ( to learn ) now it
3263     seem's people can't handle what they see. You say freedom is a mater of
3264     choice (well it is) you have the freedom to choose to carry your butt some
3265     where else...
3266     %%
3267     Steve Orzel (phloam@vol.com) wrote:
3268     [...]
3269     : The purpose of the newsgroup is to help out other people that have questions
3270     : about a certain topic.
3271     %%
3272     Mark Robinson wrote:
3273     >
3274     > Does any have any source code to games that I can have? Does anybody
3275     > know where I can get game sources(legally)?
3276    
3277     Here's the trial version of the three-room text adventure I'm going to
3278     write. I'm not finished yet, though.
3279    
3280     void main (void)
3281     {
3282     printf ("You are in a dark room.\n");
3283     printf ("\n");
3284     printf ("You feel a sharp pain.\n");
3285     printf ("You have died.\n");
3286     printf ("\n");
3287     printf ("!!! GAME OVER !!!");
3288     }
3289    
3290     (Don't tell, but I took some of the code from Quake.)
3291    
3292     --
3293     John Kugelman. kugelman@mnsinc.com
3294     %%
3295     [mail I got after releasing a zip-password cracker, the second biggest
3296     mistake I ever made]
3297    
3298     From: "Tom Miller"
3299     Subject: Can
3300     X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.71.1712.3
3301    
3302     Hay man can you send me some hacking tips and tricks please
3303     send to kymmiller@bigpond.com
3304     my name is Tom Miller
3305    
3306     From: "Tom Miller"
3307     Subject: Wait
3308     X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.71.1712.3
3309    
3310     Hey man its Tom can you also send me any easy systems to hack and the
3311     passwords also send me any infomation about hacking websites thank you
3312     %%
3313     From: lm@bitmover.com (Larry McVoy)
3314    
3315     [...] then think a little before flaming. Or better yet, produce something
3316     better. Flaming is easy but it is basically masturbation without the orgasm
3317     so why bother? [...]
3318     %%
3319     Günter Höns <guenter.hoens@gmd.de>
3320    
3321     Newsgroups: de.alt.ufo
3322    
3323     Offensichtlich ist noch keinem das Wasser-Wachstum aufgefallen, das sogar
3324     jeden Tag geschieht. Jeden Tag waechst der Wasserberg im Meer um mehrere
3325     Meter, ist dann naeher an der Sonne und verdunstet dann. Sogenannte
3326     Wissenschaftler haben eine abenteuerliche Theorie ueber den Einfluss des
3327     Mondes auf dieses Wachstum aufgestellt, aber inzwischen wissen wir es
3328     besser: Die Wasser-Molekuele werden von Neutrinos getroffen, und verdoppeln
3329     sich dann.
3330     %%
3331     CRASH(8)
3332     no fs
3333     A device has disappeared from the mounted-device table.
3334     Definitely hardware or software error.
3335    
3336     Unix Version 7 Manual
3337     %%
3338     On Tue, 4 Aug 1998, Larry Wall wrote:
3339     >
3340     > Maybe Pi looks like this:
3341     >
3342     > =for C
3343     > i++; /* add 1 to i */
3344     > =end
3345     > =for C++
3346     > i.value() += 1; // add 1 to i, probably
3347     > =end
3348     > =for Java
3349     > system().foo().bar().i().value().please().increment(); // ???
3350     > =end
3351     >
3352     > :-)
3353     %%
3354     > > USENET is *not* the non-clickable part of WWW!
3355     %%
3356     [on linux 2.1.111]
3357    
3358     The horrid underlining which was a feature with the monochrome Linux vt's on
3359     the previous two releases of the kernel has gone. Unfortunately, so has the
3360     cursor. A couple of brief experiments didn't result in me finding a way to
3361     turn it on.
3362     %%
3363     [...]
3364     its a true story, it happend this weekend in a nice country
3365     between Belgium (wellknown for its Dutroux-case) and Germany
3366     (wellknown for its Bratwurst), lets call it the Lowlands...
3367     [...]
3368     %%
3369     I get a sense of god-like proportions when I patch /dev/kmem with dd(1).
3370    
3371     Chad C Giffin
3372     %%
3373     [usenet, an anology]
3374     Mary Green's car was smoking. She got worried. "Whatever should I do?"
3375     worried Mary... Well, as she drove along she noticed a florists shop. "Aha!
3376     Thought Mary, "Flour shops are full of thoughtless men who need to apologize to
3377     their wives. These men are the sometimes the same ones I see swearing under
3378     the hoods of their cars in the shade of a tree."
3379    
3380     "Brrring" said the bell of the door to the flower shop as Mary poked her head
3381     through the door.
3382     "HELP!!! MY CAR IS SMOKING!" Screamed Mary.
3383     "There is a garage right next door." Said the shopkeeper.
3384     "That's right," Said Melvin, "And there is a parts store across the street. If
3385     you ask for Fred, he's pretty savvy about that kind of stuff."
3386     Now Joe was also in the flower store. This was his first time in trouble, so
3387     he did not hear the 30 or 40 people per day who came in screaming about their
3388     cars smoking (mostly men, of course -- the ones under the shade trees,
3389     usually.)
3390    
3391     "Why don't you help the stinking lady!!" Screamed Joe. "It might be your
3392     muffler bearings..." he continued. Or maybe it's your deisel glow plugs or
3393     your tire pressure..."
3394     Now Tim, also new to the flower shop felt the courage to chime in, "Or it could
3395     even be your cooling system. Sometimes a hose gets a crack."
3396     "My car smoked once and it was an oil leak, where the head gasket was spraying
3397     oil in the manifold." Hollered Larry
3398     "Hey lady, why don't you get your car the patch if it's smoking" chortled Glen.
3399     Well, the hollering went on into the evening, and the lady finally went to the
3400     gas station and found that the heater core had a tiny split and was repaired in
3401     three days for a cost of $175.23.
3402     %%
3403     > Nun gut, Berliner sollen ja eh etwas heller sein.
3404    
3405     Sicher, das macht der Inzest, und die Isolation!:)
3406     %%
3407     > Nun gut, Berliner sollen ja eh etwas heller sein.
3408    
3409     Stimmt, deswegen waren sie wohl auch die ersten, die Hitler hinterherliefen...
3410     :-(
3411     %%
3412     >Mt 24,34 Wahrlich, ich sage euch: Dieses Geschlecht wird nicht vergehen, bis
3413     >dies alles geschieht.
3414     >Und es verging nicht.
3415    
3416     So what?
3417    
3418     Ich dachte eher an:
3419    
3420     " 'Und sein Wabbel wird an einer Lanze aufgespiesst', wiederholte der
3421     Oberste Groesste Meister grimmig. Im Hintergrund knarrte etwas, als
3422     Bruder Pfoertner versuchte, das klemmende Portal zu oeffnen. 'Sind wir
3423     jetzt alle soweit? Befinden sich vielleicht noch andere Unwissende
3424     unter uns,die sich verirrt haben?' fuegte er mit aetzendem Sarkasmus
3425     hinzu. 'Gut. Wunderbar. Ich bin ja _so_ froh. Vermutlich brauche ich
3426     nicht zu fragen, ob die vier Wachtuerme geschlossen sind, oder? Oh,
3427     ausgezeichnet. Hat sich jemand die Muehe gemacht, der Heiligen Hose
3428     die Beichte abzunehmen? Ach, tatsaechlich? Auf die richtige Art und
3429     Weise? Und wenn ich nachsehe? Na schoen. Sind vor den Fenstern die
3430     roten Kordeln des Intellekts gespannt worden? Gut. Nun, dann koennen
3431     wir jetzt vielleicht beginnen.' ".
3432    
3433     Terry Pratchett, "Wachen! Wachen!", S. 15f
3434    
3435     Antje
3436     %%
3437     [....]
3438    
3439     Da muss ich ja, obwohl ich beinahe meinen Humor verloren haette, leise
3440     grinsen. Ich darf zusammenfassen: Du bringst uns keine Beweise, weil Du 1.
3441     zu arm und 2. zu sehr ausgelastet mit der Rettung der Welt und der Zukunft
3442     und so bist. Ausserdem brauchst Du keine Beweise, weil sich Dein
3443     Gedankengebaeude nach eingehender Nabelschau als selbsttragend erwiesen hat.
3444     Finde ich gut! Akzeptiert!
3445    
3446     Da will ich nicht weiter stoeren,
3447    
3448     Antje
3449     %%
3450     It seems that writing to /dev/vcs0 makes the console singing "Ugh,
3451     lalala, I love you baby..."
3452     --
3453     Pavel.Janik@inet.cz
3454     %%
3455     On Thu, 16 Jul 1998, Linus Torvalds wrote:
3456     >
3457     > Kubys
3458    
3459     Kubys is my evil twin brother. Sorry about that.
3460    
3461     Linus
3462     %%
3463     > eieio stands for "Enforce In-Order Execution of I/O".
3464    
3465     .... and it is definitely my favorite name for an assembly language
3466     instruction (the non-native-English speakers on the list presumably
3467     don't know the childhood song "Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O").
3468     %%
3469     > It is *big* and never uses.
3470    
3471     That's parses like English, but I'll be hornswoggled if I can figure
3472     out what it means.
3473     --
3474     Chip Salzenberg - a.k.a. - <chip@perlsupport.com>
3475     %%
3476     [...] HP's PA-8500, for example, has 1.5 Mbytes of L1 cache on-chip. The
3477     company has described the 8500 as a cache SRAM with an ancillary CPU. [...]
3478     %%
3479     From: Dave Cinege <dcinege@psychosis.com>
3480     Date: Mon, 13 Jul 1998 06:10:31 -0400
3481    
3482     Terry L Ridder wrote:
3483    
3484     > at some future date end up being released under the BSD License is what
3485     > is being discussed.
3486    
3487     Well my licence is bigger then your licence.
3488     %%
3489     [gtk/testgtk, after dragging & dropping an object:]
3490    
3491     Drop data of type text/plain was:
3492    
3493     Bill Gates demands royalties for your use of his innovation
3494    
3495     [and the button reads]
3496    
3497     Continue with life in spite of this oppression
3498     %%
3499     Joshua Waxman <jwaxman@ymail.yu.edu> writes:
3500    
3501     While DJGPP is indeed a C as well as a C compiler, there are certain
3502    
3503     A terribly succinct, as well as a true, statement. However, it has a
3504     certain amount of redundancy.
3505     %%
3506     Compatibility with oneself is Microsoft's greatest strength. When they hit
3507     the 64 bit transition they will hit a major internal incompatibility problem.
3508    
3509     ...
3510    
3511     Peter da Silva <peter@baileynm.com>
3512     %%
3513     >Hello,
3514     >
3515     >I am new to Perl. Can anyone tell me where I can download a full
3516     >operational Perl version for a Windows 95 system?
3517     >
3518    
3519     Of course it all depends on what you mean by "a full operational Perl
3520     version" Perl on Win32 has limitations that are largely due to the
3521     nature of the underlying OS, Perl on Win95 has further limitations
3522     compared with NT due to its own shortcomings .
3523     %%
3524     An injunction delaying Windows 98 would clearly have a negative impact
3525     on the country as a whole.
3526     Compaq President & CEO Eckhard Pfeiffer,
3527     explaining why Microsoft shouldn't be
3528     prosecuted under anti-monopoly laws.
3529     %%
3530     With a PC, I always felt limited by the software available. On Unix, I am
3531     limited by my knowledge. --Peter J. Schoenster <pschon@baste.magibox.net>
3532     %%
3533     There is a need to keep from being locked into Open Systems. --IBM sales rep
3534     %%
3535     In comp.lang.perl.misc,
3536     Stylin <stylinsty@yahoo.comREMOVE> writes:
3537     :Can anyone point me to the algorithm for creating a unique id?
3538    
3539     $id = `cat /dev/kmem`;
3540    
3541     --tom
3542     --
3543     Real programmers can write assembly code in any language. :-)
3544     --Larry Wall in <8571@jpl-devvax.JPL.NASA.GOV>
3545     %%
3546     Newsgroup: comp.lang.perl.misc
3547     Subject: Larry 1 Bill 0
3548     %%
3549     On 3 Jul 1998, Ben Pfaff wrote:
3550    
3551     > The only problem with these AIs is that they don't handle references
3552     > to themselves as AIs very well. In faSegmentation fault (core dumped)
3553     > NO CARRIER
3554     > !@*&#@#%T^@&*(GU*SD*(@!&*(@#R(*FERHGH*(@#(&$&#@Y!&R
3555     %%
3556     > People come here to ask questions, not for intellectual gratification, but
3557     > rather they are seeking solutions. As such, the incorrect answer was
3558     > better.
3559    
3560     There's something... terribly wrong with this statement. I can't quite put
3561     my finger on it. Hmmm.
3562     %%
3563     comp.lang.c does not exist to accomodate the laziness of those who cannot be
3564     bothered to learn netiquette. That's what comp.lang.c++ is for.
3565     %%
3566     |> : > but... a microwave is an example of an embedded system,
3567     |>
3568     |> : Who says? He just said it was a microwave. He didn't say it was
3569     |> : a free-standing implimentation.
3570     |>
3571     |> This is approaching arguing for the sake of argument. Have you
3572     |> ever seen a microwave oven that supports a hosted C environment?
3573    
3574     The Lipton Ritchie Model 8 did. I'm sure that many posters will
3575     point out that Lipton's implementation of the stdio libraries was
3576     horrendously buggy. It was, but it was still a great system. It
3577     remains the only C implementation I know of that could be used to
3578     build Bison, and then cook it.
3579    
3580     Viva la buffalo burgers.
3581     %%
3582     A strategically-placed PDP-11 can be used to heat your entire
3583     home. I've got one in my basement, next to a large box of "She's
3584     The Sheriff" drink coasters. I sold my furnace years ago. The
3585     Digital Heating, Ventilation, and Air Conditioning Corporation
3586     can be found online at http://www.dhvacc.com/.
3587     %%
3588     The lbxproxy program has various options, all of which are optional.
3589     -- lbxproxy(1)
3590     %%
3591     Re: Where to learn Windows programming...
3592    
3593     |> I'll take a Schildt book any day, thanks.
3594    
3595     Great. I'm expecting to see the line above as a back-cover blurb
3596     on the next "Bullschildt: The Complete Reference".
3597     %%
3598     Subject: Re: The wrong position of while, if and else?
3599    
3600     that's some ugly piece of code buddy...
3601     %%
3602     In article <1998062718481700.OAA03186@ladder01.news.aol.com>, eyrei@aol.com (EYREI) writes:
3603     |> I have recently started learning the C Language. I have created a simple file
3604     |> to determine whether or not a number is Prime. When I run it, the program
3605     |> crashes with the error message :- Unhandled Exception :- General Protection
3606     |> Exception 0x5FD7:0x379F. Prime(1) Processor Fault.
3607    
3608     |> What does this mean.
3609    
3610     It means you've got a broken operating system, and should immediately
3611     install [free|net|open]BSD[OS] or Linux.
3612     %%
3613     Newsgroups: comp.lang.c
3614    
3615     On Thu, 25 Jun 1998, Emulov wrote:
3616     > Hi, i don't know if this is a stupid question..
3617    
3618     Off-topic, too! Imagine that.
3619     %%
3620     "Right now we are the most shit hot piece of PC networking software on the
3621     planet. The only people who can touch us are FreeBSD (who also dont do
3622     streams)."
3623     -- Alan Cox, in "Streams and Linux"
3624     %%
3625     "Perl combines all of the worst aspects of BASIC, C and line noise."
3626     - Keith Packard <keithp@ncd.com>
3627     %%
3628     Lord Fellatio <richter_m@hotmail.com>
3629    
3630     >Wo soll das Loch denn dann sein? Im Meeresboden?
3631    
3632     Klaro.
3633    
3634     >Von oben duerfte man es also ueberhaupt nicht sehen
3635     >koennen, da ueber dem potentiellen Loch im Meeresboden doch
3636     >wahrscheinlich erstmal Wasser und dann viel Eis liegen wuerde. Wie
3637     >verhindern die Ausserirdischen denn, dass Wasser ins Loch einstroemt?
3638    
3639     Na ist doch völlig logo, mit nem rotierenden Traktorstrahl. Die
3640     Energie klauen die ?r***e dem Erdmagnetfeld.
3641    
3642     >Gibt es da einen kosmischen Badewannenstoepsel? Haben sie es mit
3643     >Eisbergen verstopft? Oder benutzen sie das einstroemende Wasser zu
3644     >Kajakfahrten bis hinunter zum Suedpol? (Das waere doch auch endlich
3645     >mal eine einleuchtende Erklaerung fuer die Eismassen, die die
3646     >Antarktis bedecken - man muesste halt nur, der Kontinentaldrift
3647     >folgend, immer wieder neue Schaechte bohren. Oder die Kontinentaldrift
3648     >einfach wegdiskutieren...)
3649    
3650     Die enorme Zentrifugalkraft im Erdinnern schleudert das Wasser wieder
3651     am Nordpolpol raus, falls der Traktorstrahl versagen sollte (Dies
3652     passiert immer dann, wenn das Erdmagnetfeld umkippt). Nun kommt sicher
3653     der Einwand, die Erde würde zu langsam rotieren. Das ist nur bedingt
3654     richtig. Richtig ist hingegen, daß die Rotationsgeschwindigkeit im
3655     Erdinnern um den Faktor 1000 (ca; sehr schwer zu messen: Magma) größer
3656     ist als auf der Erdoberfläche. Dies ist auch die Ursache für die
3657     Kontinentaldrift und die Mondphasen.
3658    
3659     Die Mondphasen wiederum beeinflussen das Erdmagnetfeld und sind daher
3660     die Ursache für die Sonnenflecken. Den Sonnenflecken haben wir auch
3661     die momentane Klimaveränderung zu verdanken. Auf der anderen Seite hat
3662     die Zunahme der Treibhausgase eine Erhöhung des Reflektionsvermögens
3663     der Atmosphäre zur Folge, welches dazu führt, daß ein Teil der
3664     Sonnenenergie zur Sonne zurückreflektiert wird. Dies heizt wiederum
3665     die Sonnenflecken auf und verkürzt deren Zyklus. All dies wird sich in
3666     den nächten Monaten so aufschaukeln, daß vorraussichtlich im Novemner
3667     2002 das Erdmagnetfeld zusammenbrechen wird. Wie damals bei den Dinos.
3668     Nur war dort ein Kometeneinschlag die Ursache.
3669    
3670     cu in hell 2002
3671     %%
3672     "Hiroshima '45, Chernobyl '85, Windows '95"
3673     %%
3674     >In unix, one might say 'man 3 crypt'.
3675    
3676     Of course, on a Solaris system this won't give you what you want. You
3677     get a message that it can't find the man page for 3. It then prints
3678     the man page for crypt(1).
3679    
3680     Of course, all a beginner has to do is figure out that the 3 is the
3681     section number in the Unix manual. He can then use man man to find
3682     that on Solaris one uses -s to specify the section so he'll try
3683    
3684     man -s3 crypt
3685    
3686     Unfortunately, that doesn't work either. He'll get the message "No
3687     entry for crypt in section(s) 3 of the manual."
3688    
3689     If he doesn't give up, he can go back to the manual page for man and
3690     find that the -a switch prints all matching manual pages. Or perhaps
3691     he can figure out to use the command
3692    
3693     man -s3 Intro.3
3694    
3695     to get a list of everything in section 3. He'll then find out that
3696     crypt is in section 3C so he should use
3697    
3698     man -s3c crypt
3699    
3700     Gee. I don't understand why beginners have so much trouble with this
3701     stuff. I've only been programming Unix for 15 years and I don't have
3702     any trouble.
3703     --
3704     Michael M Rubenstein
3705     %%
3706     Take a moment to consider these lines:
3707    
3708     %OVERLOAD=( '""' => sub { join("", @{$_[0]}) } );
3709    
3710     sub html { my($type)=shift; bless ["<$type>", @_, "</$type>"]; }
3711    
3712     :-) I *love* Perl 5! Thankyou Larry and Ilya.
3713    
3714     Regards,
3715     Tim Bunce.
3716    
3717     p.s. If you didn't get it, think about recursive data types: html(html())
3718     p.p.s. I'll turn this into a much more practical example in a day or two.
3719     p.p.p.s. It's a pity that overloads are not inherited. Is this a bug?
3720     %%
3721     From: alan@lxorguk.ukuu.org.uk (Alan Cox)
3722    
3723     ...
3724    
3725     > now is evil". This only shows two things: you never looked at the bad
3726     > experiences of the industry where following a rotten design and
3727     > keeping backward compatibility lead to unusable systems. And second:
3728    
3729     I worked for 3com. I know eveyrhting about following a rotten design until
3730     its unusable, believe me I do.
3731     %%
3732     Ok(slow) -> !NeedComputer
3733    
3734     Semour Cray
3735     %%
3736     Ullrich Jans at University of Karlsruhe, Germany:
3737    
3738     Oh Gott! Es ist voller crons!
3739     %%
3740     From: p00h <p00h@MONMOUTH.COM>
3741     Subject: Re: AOL for Windows DoS/Exploit
3742    
3743     aol supports PARTIAL html, its like win95's implementation of tcp/ip
3744     it only supports parts of it
3745     %%
3746     egcs/gcc/gcse.c:
3747     /* Help stamp out big monolithic functions! */
3748     %%
3749     [...] Yes, I'm being sarcastic. Especially regarding HPPA assembler syntax
3750     as provided by HP, which was designed by someone who should not have been
3751     let near a language-design project like that, too often "little languages",
3752     whether assemblers, tools, or C++, are designed by people who are unaware
3753     of, or give little thought to, the outright readability of code written in
3754     the language, in the sense that the basic semantics should be fairly obvious
3755     *without* the reader having to memorize lots of semantic information.
3756    
3757     (In HPPA assembler's case, one glaring stupidity was the nullified branches,
3758     which have completely different semantics depending on whether the label
3759     being branched to happens to assemble to a negative or positive offset! A
3760     smarter design would have required the programmer to specify whether such a
3761     branch was a "forward" or "backward" branch explicitly, then the assembler
3762     and/or linker would complain if reality didn't match the programmer's
3763     specification. I've never looked into whether GNU's HPPA as fixes this
3764     botch; I gather GNU as fixes many botches, though, so it wouldn't surprise
3765     me if it did, even though that might make for some compatibility problems
3766     with existing HP as code.) [...]
3767    
3768     tq vm, (burley)
3769     %%
3770     libc/posix/regex.h:
3771     /* The following two types have to be signed and unsigned integer type
3772     wide enough to hold a value of a pointer. For most ANSI compilers
3773     ptrdiff_t and size_t should be likely OK. Still size of these two
3774     types is 2 for Microsoft C. Ugh... */
3775     typedef long int s_reg_t;
3776     typedef unsigned long int active_reg_t;
3777     %%
3778     libc/db2/db.h:
3779     /*
3780     * While Microsoft's compiler is ANSI C compliant, it doesn't have _STDC_
3781     * defined by default, you specify a command line flag or #pragma to turn
3782     * it on. Don't do that, however, because some of Microsoft's own header
3783     * files won't compile.
3784     */
3785     %%
3786     > UTC variation and begining and ending dates of DST (if observed) would be
3787     > great.
3788    
3789     I answered only the places I can comment on.
3790    
3791     > BASSAS DA INDIA
3792    
3793     This rock is below water half of the time!
3794     If any inhabitants have been there, I do not think they observe DST
3795     on a regular basis! ;-)
3796     %%
3797     # ./test-plugin.pl
3798     Bizarre copy of CODE in sassign at /root/.gimp/plug-ins/test-plugin.pl line 40.
3799     wire_read: unexpected EOF (plug-in crashed?)
3800     %%
3801     >
3802     > The "where do you want to go today?" generation has taken the
3803     > developer out of the "programmer" by removing the vital, development
3804     > tools from the environment and precanning software.
3805    
3806     No kidding. Point. Click. Point. Click. Point. Click. Brain Atrophy.
3807     %%
3808     Lars Chr Hausmann <36haus@but.auc.dk> writes:
3809    
3810     >Hello!
3811    
3812     >I have to write something about, what Perl is.
3813     >I need some crystal clear info about, what perl is. So if any of you
3814     >would be so kind just to mail. Then I would be grateful!
3815    
3816    
3817     Perl.
3818    
3819     regards
3820     jobst
3821     %%
3822     Subject: Re: Cyrix 6x86MX and Centaur C6 CPUs in 2.1.102
3823     From: alan@lxorguk.ukuu.org.uk (Alan Cox)
3824     Date: Thu, 21 May 1998 22:31:02 +0100 (BST)
3825    
3826     > Well, that depends. They SHOULD be. By Intel 'standards' *laff*, they have
3827     > to be identical stepping, indicating identical features. However, I've
3828    
3829     They don't. Pentiums have fairly strict rules, P6/PII much less. Also Intel
3830     are pretty good at following the MP 1.1/1.4 standard its the motherboard
3831     makers who get it wrong - primarily the BIOS is full of bugs. It appears
3832     nobody tests bios code against specs any more. It looks like they do
3833     compile flash, boot 95, boot NT, ship. The quality of bios code has dived to
3834     the absolute pits.
3835     %%
3836     Unix never says `Please.' -- Rob Pike
3837     %%
3838     > What about: . scriptname
3839     > ------------------^ this is a dot!
3840    
3841     Funny, it looks like a "p" to me.
3842     %%
3843     A computer without Microsoft and IBM is like chocolate cake without
3844     ketchup and mustard
3845     %%
3846     Subject: Re: Challange for perl `GURUS
3847    
3848     vimal gajjar wrote:
3849     >
3850     > Hi there,
3851     > Here is a small challange. Is it possible to have a perl
3852     > code which takes e.g. three parameters as input. time, val1, val2. and
3853     > the name of the prog. is say challange.pl. Now if i execute
3854     > "challange.pl 10 5 2" this perl script wille consume
3855     > 5% of cpu
3856     > 2 Mb of RAM
3857     > for the period of 10 Seconds.
3858     >
3859     > can one of the gurus take this challange?
3860    
3861     Examining the 5 copies of this post has consumed 5% of the
3862     brain power I allocate to reviewing c.l.p.m, about 10 seconds, and
3863     has caused the death of 2 million brain cells.
3864     %%
3865     > >> /A:You can usually write the program faster than you can
3866     > >> dial/dl/hangup/install/read docs/fix it/fix the fix/.
3867     >
3868     > >s/usually/never/
3869     >
3870     > s/sometimes/never/
3871    
3872     Cute. You embarrass yourself by your ignorance of perl.
3873     %%
3874     :That's probably true, but I really can't speak to it. But, if there
3875     :were no *nix around, there'd be no Perl. Nor would there be a need for
3876     :Perl, IMO.
3877    
3878     Gotta love them JCL and ini dot bat dot bad dot doo dah files.
3879    
3880     TC
3881     %%
3882     'cc:Mail is a wonderful application, as long as you don't want to read or send mail.'
3883     %%
3884     shurik@iron.Te.NeT.UA - Alexandr Dubovikov at TeNeT Networking Centre
3885    
3886     Hi guys!
3887    
3888     How check socket, alive it or die ?
3889     %%
3890     --> Questions not to ask on linux-kernel <--
3891    
3892     Miscellaneous flame-wars:
3893     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
3894     12) The gnome-kde debate does not belong on linux-kernel.
3895     13) The emacs-vi debate does not belong on linux-kernel.
3896     14) Porting linux to run under windows is not interesting.
3897     15) Whether a given intel CISC chip "is really RISC" is not interesting.
3898     %%
3899     Subject: what a week!
3900     From: "C. Scott Ananian" <cananian@lcs.mit.edu>
3901     Date: Thu, 14 May 1998 03:13:23 -0400 (EDT)
3902    
3903     unicode, boot-logos, GGI, STREAMS, the necessity of a short devel cycle
3904     and the instability of 2.0.x, "ifconfig stopped working", "you really *do*
3905     need to remove 'encaps'", Linus' tarball practices... it seems like we're
3906     running out of things to flame off on. Here's my humble contribution:
3907    
3908     I'VE MADE A KEWL NEW CHARSET THAT I THINK EVERYONE SHOULD USE. IT HAS ALL
3909     THE LETTERS IN MY LOGIN MAPPED TO THE LOWEST 16 CHARACTERS SO WE CAN
3910     COMPRESS THINGS REAL GOOD AND THE LETTERS IN MY BROTHER B1FF'S NAME ARE
3911     ALL IN HIGH ASCII CUZ THAT'S WHERE LOSERS BELONG!!!2!!7
3912    
3913     I ONLY USE EMACS AND I THINK VI SUX!!$231!!
3914    
3915     GNOME RULES AND KDE IS DEMON-SPAWN BECAUSE IT IS NOT FREE.! !
3916    
3917     WE NEED KGI IN THE KERNEL (NOT LIBGGI, NOT THE TERMINAL IMPROVEMENTS
3918     WHATEVER THEY'RE CALLED) IN ORDER TO HAVE WAY KEWL BOOT LOGOS AND RUN MY
3919     BROTHER B1FF'S GAMES!!1!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!11!!!
3920    
3921     I USE A BIG-ENDIAN MACHINE BECAUSE THEY RULE. LITTLE-ENDIAN MACHINES ARE
3922     EVIL. AND A PENTIUM *IS* A RISC PROCESSOR!!!
3923    
3924     WE SHOULD PORT LINUX TO WINDOWS SO WE CAN USE ALL THE KEWL HARDWARE
3925     DRIVERS!!!!!@@#!
3926    
3927     Did I miss any? ;-)
3928    
3929     *Please* don't respond seriously to this email. It's a joke. A joke.
3930     Laugh. Please.
3931    
3932     And then let's kill all the flaming threads, shall we?
3933     --Scott
3934     %%
3935     > Well, /proc/kcore already reports its actual size...
3936    
3937     And it isn't about to change at runtime either. That is the size of
3938     installed memory. I've yet to see a single person successfully insert or
3939     remove a SIMM/DIMM while a machine was running. If they did, and it was
3940     successful, the linux code will update the filesize. ;o)
3941     %%
3942     Toby Heywood (toby@he-net.demon.co.uk) wrote:
3943     : This is a multi-part message in MIME format.
3944    
3945     One of those 'M's stands for Mail.
3946    
3947     This is not mail.
3948    
3949     This is Usenet.
3950    
3951     Please post only plain text like everyone else does.
3952     %%
3953     ------------ etienne.lorrain@ibm.net
3954     --- hdc: irq timeout: status=0xd0 { Busy }
3955     --- ide1: reset: success
3956     -----------> I like Linux !
3957     %%
3958     > I have experienced people walking up to my console and saying "What
3959     > the hell does that mean" in sheer terror as the machine boots.
3960    
3961     Tell them it's magic, and earn the respect of your colleagues. I always
3962     do.
3963     %%
3964     ++ Actually, I'm not at a loss for words. Here's one that's very appropriate:
3965     ++ PLONK.
3966     %%
3967     ++ > SSI is *not* HTML.
3968     Re: Subraumfunk
3969    
3970     Ja, ein Handy waere da praktisch. Die hoeheren Gebuehren rechnen sich,
3971     wenn man ueber die Grenzen des Sonnensystems hinaus telefonieren will.
3972    
3973     Die Telekom wuerde da wieder mal erbarmungslos abzocken. Ich kann es
3974     mir schon vorstellen: SunSystem-Tarif, vielleicht auch einen
3975     InnerPlanets-Sondertarif, dann einen LocalGroupWeekend-Specialtarif,
3976     eine Supercluster-Zone und so weiter. Und wenn es auf der Venus
3977     schneit, telefonieren alle fuer die Haelfte.
3978     %%
3979     > > Vergiss es. Du wirst nie und nimmer von Armando eine
3980     > > konkrete, verwertbare Antwort bekommen.
3981     >
3982     > Doch, man bekommt von mir sogar sehr viele Antworten.
3983    
3984     Du hast gerade zwei Adjektive weggelassen.
3985     %%
3986     ++ Oh yeah. Show me an example of SSI used outside of HTML.
3987     Show me an HTML DTD mentioning SSI directives.
3988     %%
3989     Namsuk Kim wrote:
3990     > Is there a way to convert a scalar data to Acii data format?
3991    
3992     I am not familar with ACII. If you mean ASCII, then the question I have is
3993     - is the data in EBCDIC now?
3994    
3995     Bill Jones
3996     %%
3997     GNU/getopt.c:
3998    
3999     #if defined (WIN32) && !defined (__CYGWIN32__)
4000     /* It's not Unix, really. See? Capital letters. */
4001     #include <windows.h>
4002     #define getpid() GetCurrentProcessId()
4003     #endif
4004     %%
4005     Subject: IIS 4.0, PW32i316, CGI Programs
4006    
4007     Perlis.dll does not pass command line arguments correctly via the web. That
4008     is, invoking the URL
4009    
4010     http://www.myserver.com/myprogram.pl?Argument1&Argument2...&Argumentn
4011    
4012     causes the myprogram.pl to execute, but @ARGV is empty.
4013     %%
4014     "You need to use CGI."
4015     "I am using CGI, it's a CGI application!"
4016     "No, no, *use* CGI. The directive 'use'."
4017     "OK, so what directive do I use?"
4018     "No, no, you *use* *use*. Use CGI."
4019     "I *am* using CGI!"
4020    
4021     Craig Berry - cberry@cinenet.net
4022     %%
4023     > > Was haltet Ihr von Killfile-mailing-lists, dass sich die Leute mal
4024     > > kennenlernen koennen?
4025     >
4026     > Gute Idee ;-), wäre ich sofort dabei, datrifft man wahrscheinlich ne
4027     > Menge tolle Leute... ;-) und die wahren Freidenker.
4028    
4029     Einige Freidenker sicher, aber auch etliche Denkfreie.
4030     %%
4031     "I'm doing a (free) operating system (just a hobby, won't be big or
4032     professional like gnu) for 386(486) AT clones." -- Linus Torvalds 1991
4033     %%
4034     If it's a floppy, it might be a copy.
4035     If it's a disk, you're also at risk.
4036     If it's a pirate, the vendors are irate.
4037     To avoid such frustration, try: Free Software Foundation.
4038     %%
4039     From: David Woodhouse <Dave@imladris.demon.co.uk>
4040    
4041     pcg@goof.com said:
4042     > It was much more than I usally get! It was _great_
4043    
4044     Hehe - I know the feeling.
4045    
4046     "It's broken."
4047     "What's wrong with it?."
4048     "I don't know - it just doesn't work."
4049     "Well what do you mean by 'it's broken'?"
4050     "It just doesn't work."
4051     "How can you _tell_ it's broken, for f***'s sake - what are the symptoms!?"
4052     "It gives an error message."
4053     "Would you care to tell me what it says?"
4054     "It says.... something about there being an error."
4055     "That's not very helpful. Tell me it word for word."
4056     "It says 'Unable to handle kernel NULL reference at something or other'"
4057     "That's not word for word. It said 'NULL pointer dereference.' Try again,
4058     letter for letter this time."
4059     %%
4060     From: "Paul B. Henson" <henson@INTRANET.CSUPOMONA.EDU>
4061    
4062     After installing Solaris 2.6 HW3/98, I discovered that /usr/bin/admintool
4063     had been installed mode 0777, world writable. Under the original release of
4064     2.6, the mode was 04555.
4065    
4066     Sun has been notified of the problem. If you're running 2.6 HW3/98, you
4067     might want to verify your admintool hasn't been tampered with and fix the
4068     perms.
4069    
4070     (Personally, I'd set them to 0000 ;). admintool? blech.)
4071     %%
4072     From: verah@netscape.com (Vera Horiuchi)
4073     Subject: Re: Risp: drama (Re: Do It Yourself)
4074    
4075     Americans ignorant of the rest of the world?
4076    
4077     I must tell a favorite story here. A friend and I were purchasing a gift
4078     for another friend who lives in Canada. I was speculating out loud about
4079     how much duty our Canadian friend would have to pay.
4080    
4081     The cashier said, "Oh, I'm sure Canadians don't have to pay any duty. We
4082     ship to Hawaii all the time, and _they_ don't have to pay duty." =:-0
4083     %%
4084     >am besten ist z.Z. das Buch von Michael Neufeld. Wer aber Wissenslücken
4085     >verspürt (was keine Schande ist), sollte diese zu stopfen suchen und nicht
4086     >Zuflucht zu absolut hirnrissigen Theorien suchen.
4087    
4088     Hirnrissig bist Du. Das es einen Zeittransfer aus der Zukunft zu den Nazis
4089     gab deckt sich mit dazu passenden Entschluesselungen bestimmter Bibelstellen
4090     und mit der dann tatsaechlichen notwendigen Geheimhaltung. Es deckt sich
4091     ueberdies damit, dass die Unterhaltung uns den Gedanken zunehmend nahelegt,
4092     also vorbereitet, und dass es bereits ein wissenschaftliches Experiment gab,
4093     bei dem ERST die Wirkung auftrat und DANN die Ursache. Die Zeitreise ist
4094     also Fakt. Und es ist sicher, dass Jemand per Zeitreise den Nazis helfen
4095     wollte. Gelegentliche Theorien, dass auch diese ausserirdische Hilfe gehabt
4096     haetten sollen nur davon ablenken, eine andere Erklaerung liefern. Das ist
4097     logisch, denn die Taeter sitzen ja irgendwo in unserer Zeit und moechten
4098     sicher nicht erkannt werden.
4099    
4100     Du scheinst die simpelsten Grundzuege der Zeitlogik nicht verstehen zu wollen.
4101    
4102     normarz@aol.com
4103     %%
4104     >Oder anders gesagt:
4105     >Glaubst Du, Du könntest mit einem hochmodernen Maschinengewehr eine römische
4106     >Legion
4107     >schlagen?
4108    
4109     Klar. Frage mal Cortez.
4110    
4111     Bye
4112     Andreas
4113     %%
4114     >Article 2B is a threat to anyone who uses a computer. I just wanted to
4115    
4116     It may be a threat to any american using a computer. Fortunately, the U.S.
4117     justice does not yet apply outside the U.S.A.
4118    
4119     I.a.W.: You're currently creating a lot of happy non-U.S. software
4120     companies.
4121    
4122     Kind regards
4123     Henning
4124     %%
4125     From: "Adam J. Richter" <adam@yggdrasil.com>
4126     Date: Fri, 24 Apr 1998 04:14:11 -0700
4127     Subject: Re: driver for Creative Labs DVD kits
4128    
4129     At least with the IDE DVD drive that I have, plugging it directly
4130     into an IDE port and using the regular Linux ide-cd driver works just fine
4131     for reading [...] CD and the [not] copy protected sections of the DVD's.
4132    
4133     There is a protocol that the hardware decoder boards use to
4134     tell the DVD drive that they are a licensed implementation and should
4135     be allowed to read the copy protected sectors as well. I have been
4136     told that this protocol can be done entirely in software with a
4137     standard IDE port. Hopefully, somebody will reverse engineer this and
4138     make it a demand loaded kernel module. (Seriously, there is a lot
4139     that you are allowed to do with copyrighted material that this sort of
4140     hardware restriction prevents, and there are other important political
4141     issues involved relating to your rights to do as you please with the
4142     computer equipment that you bought and paid for.)
4143     %%
4144     Where do you want to go today?
4145     We might support that sometime next year.
4146     -=- Microsoft
4147     (But I doubt it.)
4148     -=- Me
4149     -=- James Mastros
4150     %%
4151     Hello570 <hello570@aol.com> wrote:
4152     > I tried printing a line to a file using both of the
4153     > following methods, but the output was split into two
4154     >lines.
4155    
4156     If you don't want newlines in the middle of your string, then don't
4157     put newlines in the middle of your string.
4158     %%
4159     http://www.perl.com/CPAN/authors/Dean_Roehrich/subjects.post
4160     %%
4161     Einstein himself said that God doesn't roll dice. But he was wrong. And
4162     in fact, anyone who has played role-playing games knows that God
4163     probably had to roll quite a few dice to come up with a character like
4164     Einstein. -- Larry Wall
4165     %%
4166     From: Ragnar Hojland Espinosa <root@lightside.ddns.org>
4167    
4168     My $0.02 Euros on internationalization? I'm in Spain and my keyboard is
4169     mosty US mapped because the Spanish map is really awkward for programming.
4170     Computers were designed to be funcional, not politically (or locally)
4171     correct (hm, I don't think HAL ever spoke Russian). This "computers are easy
4172     for all" GUI related trend has done a lot of money, and lot of damage; at
4173     least command line OSes forced the user to actually learn something and
4174     absorb information. The user assumed so, so he did. Now he doesn't, and
4175     it's not all his fault.
4176    
4177     The WWW is full of useless (and ugly) graphics, of useless links to links to
4178     pages with links to links which usually end up in a huge links page. Of
4179     course, there are some jewels.. but they should be majority! It's
4180     understandable, when the tools and languages focus more on aspect that in
4181     content.
4182    
4183     Usenet is worse than ever, the interesting places have been ruined by
4184     spammers, c00l hak3rz, and more and more people asking (or demanding) for
4185     others doing their homework.. at least some time ago they were willing to
4186     learn (or pay for it;)
4187    
4188     IRC.. heh. The few times I've been on funet almost all I found is the same
4189     people in the above paragraph. And I do know some of them even run scripts
4190     to try denial of service or other destructive attacks on people they see,
4191     just for fun or to get the op.
4192    
4193     Email. Someone selling an "incredible program that allows you to bypass
4194     your ISP mail server, for only $89" (thats right, a smtp server). No OS
4195     mentioned, I somehow can guess which. And that stupid thing of sending
4196     mail to people in RTF and HTML format.. I'm gonna answer them in LaTeX.
4197    
4198     Internet, your ilimited junk yard.
4199    
4200     Using computers would make me real sad if it wasn't for UNIX and, of
4201     course, Linux and Linux people.
4202     %%
4203     ... WNT == ++VMS . Literally. Dave Cutler created VMS,
4204     then he rewrote it as WNT.
4205    
4206     Ever used VMS? It's a step above DOS. Barely.
4207     --
4208     Clark O. Morgan cmorgan@aracnet.com
4209     %%
4210     >Subject: If "=~" means match what is doesn't match?
4211    
4212     I heard that a friend of a friend might have once been told about a
4213     rumor that this information can be found in perlop, right next to
4214     where =~ is documented. (It's !~)
4215    
4216     I agree with Tom's assessment that the fall of modern man will be
4217     preceded by the de-evolution of communications to the days of oral
4218     tradition.
4219     %%
4220     "Windows 95, the most installed system in the world,
4221     I know, I've done it 5 or 6 times myself"
4222     %%
4223     The statistics programming language S, from AT&T, combines lazy
4224     evaluation with imperative programming. A nightmare.
4225     %%
4226     "In 1965, as part of a research and development project for the
4227     U.S. Army, engineers at TRW Corp developed a software program
4228     called Generalized Information Retrieval Lanaguage and System."
4229     Or GIRLS for short.
4230     %%
4231     Wissen bremst die Meinungsbildung voll aus.
4232     %%
4233     I have an idea: Anybody who posts an URGENT! or EMERGENCY! request should
4234     post the circumstances behind the urgency. "I was having sex with my
4235     mistress in the server room and I knocked the Linux box over and the hard
4236     drive crashed and so I've reinstalled everything but I still can't get
4237     5_004_03 to build!"
4238    
4239     This would inspire me to action far more than the implied subtext of "I
4240     have no patience."
4241    
4242     xoxo,
4243     Andy
4244     %%
4245     > I have Perl5 running on my pc.
4246     > and also front page98 and microsoft personal web server runnig.
4247     We all have our cross to bear.
4248     %%
4249     (THIS IS LONG, YOU MAY WANT TO SKIP)
4250    
4251     From: mjd@plover.com (Mark-Jason Dominus)
4252     Date: 09 Nov 1995 02:57:30 GMT
4253     Subject: Re: system() question
4254    
4255     There are a lot of reasons, many of which get repeated over and
4256     over again, many of which don't. Some of the reasons you hear a lot
4257     are: Questions are incoherently phrased. Questions have the form 'My
4258     code doesn't work' and don't include the code. Questions include the
4259     code, and it's 200 lines long, and comp.lang.perl is not a debugging
4260     service. Nobody knows the answer to the question. The question is so
4261     badly punctuated that nobody can bear to read it. Questions aer
4262     written by a non-native speaker of English and the native speakers who
4263     are trying to understand it can't. (That's a shame, but it does
4264     happen. I often wish that these people would post in their native
4265     languages. I'd love to see more discussion in languages other than
4266     English. Some Dutch guy tried posting all his comp.lang.c articles in
4267     Dutch a few years ago, and all the Americans flamed him. How
4268     humiliating for me!)
4269    
4270     Apart from these oft-mentioned reasons are many others that are
4271     not so often discussed, because anyone who tries to bring them up gets
4272     flamed. But it's the truth: I know the reason I don't answer more
4273     questions is because so many of them questions are so damn stupid.
4274     They're stupid in a lot of different ways, but they're still stupid.
4275     I don't want to suggest that that's why your questions go unanswered.
4276     I don't know what you're asking. No doubt the reason your questions
4277     go unanswered is because they're so deep and interesting that nobody
4278     really knows the answer.
4279    
4280     The most common stupid question is the one from someone who has
4281     some high-level problem that they need solved. They have an idea that
4282     they'd like to do it in perl, and they don't really know perl. So
4283     instead of learning perl, they post to comp.lang.perl.misc.
4284    
4285     Now don't get me wrong. I don't have any problems answering the
4286     questions of someone who's trying to learn perl. I love THOSE
4287     qusetions. But these people don't seem to be asking useful questions
4288     for that.
4289    
4290     Today, for example, I saw a question from a guy who wants to get a
4291     list of hostnames out of nslookup. `How do I do that?' he says. And
4292     it's hard to know what to make of that. What does he mean? Does he
4293     not know how to open a pipe? Is his en' command failing? What's
4294     going on here? I can't give a useful answer without understanding the
4295     problem. Having your en' fail is a problem. Wanting to list
4296     hostnames is not a problem; it's a desire.
4297    
4298     Here are some similar questions that would have made more sense to me:
4299    
4300     1. `I'm a lazy asshole and I can't be bothered to learn to
4301     program myself, but I know if I post here you'll give me
4302     something for free.''
4303    
4304     (OK, fair enough. At least I can send him a rate card.)
4305    
4306     2. `I'm trying to use en' to talk to nslookup, but...
4307     ...here's my code; what's wrong?''
4308    
4309     (Good question.)
4310    
4311     3. `I know perl has a `System' command for running programs,
4312     but I can't see how to get my commands into nslookup
4313     once I have run it.''
4314     (Good question.)
4315    
4316     4. `I'm trying to use `Getprotobynumber' to talk to nslookup...''
4317    
4318     (Good question.)
4319    
4320     See, I'm not just biting people's heads off, here. #4 is a good
4321     question, because it gives me something to work with. OK, he has a
4322     very weird idea about interprocess communication, but that's
4323     ignorance, and that's what we're here to correct. He doesn't know
4324     about en'; I can refer him to the manual.
4325    
4326     Here's another example: Some guy wants to assemble a list of email
4327     addresses . `How do I do that?'' he wants to know. Well, duh. Get a
4328     big pad of paper and read news for a couple days and write down all
4329     the addresses you see. Problem solved. What's it doing in
4330     comp.lang.perl?
4331     Oh, you wanted to do it in perl. Well, I guess I'd open a socket
4332     to the NNTP server and send it some XHDR commands for the `From'
4333     lines. But that's not Perl; you could do that in any language. I
4334     could do it in Bourne Shell for you if I'm allowed to use a little
4335     external thingie to handle the socket parts for me. What's it doing
4336     in comp.lang.perl?
4337    
4338     Oh, you wanted us to write the program for you? Wait, let me send
4339     you my rate card.
4340    
4341     Someone posted yesterday asking how to get the data from a file where
4342     the start and end of the data is marked by keywords. Same thing going on
4343     here. `Well, here's how you solve your problem: First you go take an
4344     introductory class in programming and learn to write programs in some
4345     language. Then you go to the bookstore and buy this book by Wall and
4346     Schwartz, it's really good. Read the book carefully and try out the
4347     examples. Then if you still have general questions like `How do I do this'
4348     instead of thought that this code would do X but instead it does Y' you hire
4349     a professional to write your program for you. Or you could just skip right
4350     to step 3. Want my rate card?''
4351    
4352     The worst stupid questions are the ones that come from people who
4353     have no business asking them. The most perfect example of this that I
4354     could have imagined was in comp.unix.questions a couple of years ago.
4355     Some guy came and asked how you could tell if a file is a hard link.
4356     My jaw flapped open and it's stayed open since then. I couldn't have
4357     been any more stumped if he'd asked why Bodhidharma came from the
4358     West. What do you say to this guy? Do you tell him the truth, that
4359     all files are hard links, that even symbolic links are hard links?
4360     He's not going to understand you; you might as well keep your mouth
4361     shut. Do you tell him the truth, that the answer won't do him any
4362     good because he doesn't know what a hard link is, so why did he bother
4363     asking in the first place? No, that'll just make him mad. I followed
4364     that message for the next couple weeks, and nobody said anything.
4365     What could you say? The guy had no business asking the question and
4366     no use for the answer. Maybe the right answer would have been to cut
4367     off his finger or something. I dunno.
4368    
4369     Some questions get ignored because they're boring. Someone asked
4370     today how to compare two variables (I assumme he means the contents of
4371     those variables) to see if they're exactly the same. You've gotta be
4372     in an awfully good mood to take the time to answer that. Maybe
4373     someone will. Maybe I will.
4374    
4375     If I answer that one today, maybe he'll be back tomorrow asking
4376     how to check to see if two variables contain different values. Maybe
4377     I won't. What I find incredible is that if you tell these people to
4378     go read the manual and come back in two weeks, you sometimes get
4379     jumped on for not being helpful to beginners. Bah. If everyone told
4380     these people to go read the manual, they'd eventually figure out that
4381     that's what you have to do ,and then I wouldn't have to spend so much
4382     of my life dealing with incompetent programmers.
4383    
4384     Some questions are logically nonsensical because the querent
4385     thinks they know more than they do. A lot of these have the form
4386     `How do I use X to accomplish Y?'' There's nothing wrong with this,
4387     except that sometimes X is a chocolate-covered banana and Y is the
4388     integration of European currency systems. I always get stuck on
4389     these, probably because I can't get rid of the idea that the person
4390     really has a good reason for wanting to use X. I know a half-dozen
4391     easy simple ways to accomplish Y, but I can't imagine what X has to do
4392     with it. This is a problem for me in my day job, too. Clients are
4393     always saying to me `We want to use product X to do multimedia
4394     development on the world-wide web,'' and all I can think is `Well,
4395     gee, what would you want to go and do that for?'' Sometimes it turns
4396     out that they want to do it because they want to impress the
4397     manufacturers of X, and I don't work on those jobs.
4398    
4399     The flip side of this is a questions like `I want to accomplish
4400     X, but I don't want to use Y. What can I use instead?'' Which,
4401     again, is sometimes reasonable, and then sometimes X is closing a
4402     filehandle and Y is the `Close' function.
4403    
4404     The questions I like the best are the ones that go like this:
4405    
4406     `I want to accomplish X.
4407    
4408     I thought that the following code fragment would do it:
4409    
4410     ...
4411    
4412     But instead it does Y.
4413    
4414     Why is that?''
4415    
4416     This one is also pretty good:
4417    
4418     `I want to accomplish X.
4419     I thought I might be able to use facility Y.
4420    
4421     But Y doesn't seem like it's quite right,
4422     because of Z.
4423    
4424     What should I use instead of Y, or how can I overcome Z?''
4425    
4426     When I ignore these, it's usually because I don't know the answer.
4427     There were an awful lot of them today. It makes me very happy.
4428    
4429    
4430     There you go; a 160-line dissertation on why questions go unanswered.
4431     Now don't let me hear you saying nobody ever answers your questions.
4432    
4433     --
4434     Consulting Minister for Consultants, DNRC
4435     The Bill of Rights is paid in Responsibilities - Jean McGuire
4436     %%
4437     >> BTW, would it be easier to cope with international text using Python?
4438     >Sigh... you're breaking my heart. Ask Jack Jansen, he probably knows.
4439    
4440     If I were really evel, I would point out that the newest TCL (8.1) has
4441     support for international character sets and Unicode. But then, mentioning
4442     TCL in this newsfroup would be really bad. So, of course, I don't do that.
4443    
4444     Ups. I'm so sorry ... ;-)
4445    
4446     bye, Georg
4447     %%
4448     I personally do not believe in object orientation as a security model
4449     (nor as a general programming paradigm), but feel free to try to
4450     convince me.
4451    
4452     [ Or maybe I confuse you with somebody else and some other posting ]
4453    
4454     Linus
4455     %%
4456     ++ how can i strip new lines out at var.
4457     ++
4458    
4459     Removing new lines is very tricky, as the manual tells you so. Ignore the
4460     complicated things in the manual, and put in this neat little trick:
4461    
4462     $var=join+q,,,grep[[ord$[[qq$\137$]]<10 or+10<ord]]split+q,,,$var;
4463    
4464     If you're old enough not to read the manual, you won't have a problem
4465     understanding the above line.
4466    
4467     Abigail
4468     %%
4469     I fixed the problem by mounting the SCO volume on the SunOS box, and since
4470     1995 the problem has gone away together with the SCO machine.
4471     %%
4472     ++ Hi Does anybody know how to upload many graphic files at the push of a
4473     ++ button?
4474     Yes.
4475    
4476     ++ 100 pictures or so?
4477     Yes.
4478    
4479     ++ Can I do it in Perl?
4480     Yes.
4481    
4482     Your question isn't Perl specific. Please ask in the relevant
4483     newsgroup. alt.button.play
4484    
4485     Abigail
4486     %%
4487     perly gates - The way to perl; Enter hackerdom.
4488    
4489     perly Gates - Contradictio in Terminis.
4490    
4491     Martien
4492     %%
4493     Ren hat weder von Sinnhaftigkeit noch von Kausalität geschrieben, sondern
4494     nur von Logik. Logik und Kausalität sind in unserem (normalen) Denken zwar
4495     eng miteinander verknüpft, sind aber nicht dasselbe. Sinn ist hingegen noch
4496     etwas Drittes und ganz verschiedenes! "Sinn" bedeutet mindestens, daß eine
4497     Sache eine gewisse Richtung hat, wie in "Uhrzeigersinn". Meistens bedeutet
4498     Sinn aber, daß eine Sache einen bestimmten Zweck erfüllt. Auch darf man
4499     nicht "verursachen" mit "begründen" verwechseln, weil die beiden
4500     unterschiedlich sind. Die Existenz muß auch keinen Sinn haben, um eine
4501     Ursache zu haben. Das sind zwei völlig voneinander unabhängige Sachen. Die
4502     Existenz hat einen Sinn, also eine Richtung, wenn wir unserer Existenz eine
4503     Richtung geben. Dieser Sinn kann auf etwas abzielen, was außerhalb unserer
4504     selbst steht, muß aber nicht... Sie kann auch einen Sinn haben, der schon da
4505     war, bevor wir uns danach ausgerichtet haben - von all dem schreibt Ren aber
4506     nicht. ;)
4507    
4508     Worauf Ren wohl hinaus wollte, ist, daß wenn die Logik des begrenzten Raumes
4509     nicht gilt, daß dann die Logik schlechthin hinfällig wird und so jedes Sein
4510     fragwürdig wird. Das ist aber nicht der Fall, da die Logik, die er von den
4511     Grenzen des Raumes aufstellt, gar keine wirkliche Logik ist, sondern nur die
4512     Grenzen des menschlichen Verstandes zeigt. Er kann sich nicht vorstellen,
4513     daß außerhalb der Grenzen des Raumes "Nichts" ist, weil man sich als Mensch
4514     das Nichts nicht vorstellen kann.
4515    
4516     Darüber hinaus meinte er, daß die "Existenz unlogisch" würde. Dieser Satz
4517     ist vollkommen unverständlich. Denn entweder ist etwas, oder es ist nicht.
4518     Das ist auch schon die ganze Logik einer Existenz. (Aristoteles: Satz vom
4519     ausgeschlossenen Dritten) Unlogisch wäre, wenn etwas ist, das nicht ist oder
4520     wenn etwas nicht ist, das ist.
4521    
4522     Von der Unfähigkeit des Menschen, sich einen unbegrenzten aber endlichen
4523     Raum (oder wie auch immer der Weltraum nun aussieht) vorzustellen auf die
4524     "Unlogik der Existenz" zu schließen, ist aber wohl nicht ganz möglich, zumal
4525     eine Existenz nicht unlogisch sein kann. Was sollte das auch heißen? Daher
4526     ist das Problem, das Ren aufwirft, nur ein Scheinproblem. Die Existenz an
4527     sich wird nicht in Frage gestellt dadurch, daß man sich etwas - egal was -
4528     nicht vorstellen kann. Er verwechselt die Begriffe "unlogisch" und
4529     "unvorstellbar".
4530    
4531     Thomas.Decker@lrz.uni-muenchen.de
4532     %%
4533     Marcel Richter wrote:
4534     > Marcel Richter - IQ: 3538327
4535     ^^^
4536     fehlt da nicht irgendwo ein Komma.... =?-)
4537     %%
4538     The X server has to be the biggest program I've ever seen that doesn't
4539     do anything for you. --Ken Thompson
4540     %%
4541     linux-2.1.92/fs/autofs/root.c:
4542     printk("autofs: trying to recover, but prepare for Armageddon\n");
4543     %%
4544     >>Vincent DiPietro, the discoverer of the face on mars, has thrown in
4545     >>the towel, and said that the face on mars is a pile of rocks.
4546     >Was sollte es denn sonst sein?
4547    
4548     An artificial pile of rocks.
4549     %%
4550     > ps: mal nebenbei: eine unbekannte variable beim analysieren des
4551     > marsgesichtes ist es, dass mensch gar nicht weiss, wie die lebende,
4552     > gedachte oder sonstige vorlage eigentlich aussieht. dazu kommt natuerlich
4553     > noch das fehlende wissen um die intention des "kuenstlers", ob er
4554     > beispielsweise nur aspekte bzw. partien eines gesichtes integrieren wollte
4555     > - und natuerlich, ob es ueberhaupt kunst ist:)
4556    
4557     Ganz genau. Und das Matterhorn ist eine palaeoimpressionistische Studie des
4558     Geruchsorgans der Rasse der Ciabattanimalier. Aber das wussten hier
4559     sicherlich schon alle. Das ganze Universum ist ausserdem eigentlich nur ein
4560     grosser Flipperautomat.
4561    
4562     Christoph Schulte Moenting - ubec@rz.uni-karlsruhe.de
4563     %%
4564     > Kris Weilemann schrieb
4565     >
4566     > >MIR ging es neulich aehnlich. Ich wurde von Ausserirdischen entfuehrt.
4567     > >Ich wurde eingesperrt in einem dunklem Raum mit langen Sitzreihen und mit
4568     > >einer Popcorn-artigen Substanz gefuettert. Nach 2 Stunden war alles
4569     > >vorbei. Einen Tag spaeter stellte ich fest, dass mir 18 Mark im
4570     > >Geldbeutel fehlten. Ist das nicht krass? -Kris.
4571     %%
4572     ... Jazz ist nicht nur das erfolgreichste, sondern auch das einzige originäre Kunstgenre,
4573     daß die USA jemals hervorgebracht haben.
4574    
4575     "Apropos Musik", HR2 am 16.4.98
4576     %%
4577     http://www.rsw.com/
4578    
4579     The Unix shell as a 4GL
4580    
4581     Unix provides hundreds of programs that can be piped together to easily
4582     perform almost any function imaginable. Nothing comes close to providing the
4583     functions that come standard with Unix. Programs and philosophies carried
4584     over from other systems put walls between the user and Unix, and the power
4585     of Unix is thrown away. The shell, extended with a few relational operators,
4586     is the fourth generation database scripting language most appropriate to the
4587     Unix environment.
4588     %%
4589     Perl is incredibly difficult to parse. For example, what's the difference
4590     between these:
4591    
4592     time /3 ;#/; print "hello";
4593     sin /3 ;#/; print "goodbye";
4594    
4595     Right. The first one is time divided by 3, and the print is in a comment.
4596     The second one is the sin of the result of a regular expression match for "3
4597     ;#", and the print gets executed!
4598    
4599     There's no pure BNF in the world that'll handle that. And remember, with
4600     "use" and prototypes available, whether you parse something like "sin" or
4601     "time" depends on its definition in some other file, somewhere in the galaxy
4602     (or even decided by Perl code in a BEGIN block, that evals a prototype!).
4603    
4604     Which led Larry to say at one point: "the only thing that can parse Perl is
4605     'perl'".
4606    
4607     --
4608     Randal L. Schwartz
4609     %%
4610     Ronald J Kimball <rjk@coos.dartmouth.edu> writes:
4611    
4612     > Pascal AMRAM wrote:
4613     > > Subject: MSEXCHANGE / OUTLOOK
4614     >
4615     > So here I am trying to figure out what an M sex change is....
4616    
4617     It's obviously the opposite of an F sex change. HTH.
4618    
4619     --
4620     Jonathan Feinberg jdf@pobox.com Sunny Brooklyn, NY
4621     %%
4622     The management (my cats) made me say this.
4623     %%
4624     uae-0.6.9/custom.c:800:
4625     write_log ("Program is torturing BPLCON1.\n");
4626     %%
4627     uae-0.6.9/src/memory.c:363
4628     write_log ("Your Amiga program just did something terribly stupid\n");
4629     %%
4630     Closures make sense in any programming language where you
4631     can have the return value of a function be itself a
4632     function, as you can in Perl. Note that some languages
4633     provide anonymous functions but are not capable of
4634     providing proper closures; the Python language, for
4635     example.
4636     %%
4637     When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to
4638     resemble a nail.
4639     %%
4640     > but all I get are 501 errors, method not supported. I am not 100% sure what
4641     > I did wrong.
4642    
4643     What you did wrong was post a microsoft server question to a perl
4644     newsgroup.
4645     %%
4646     I am trying to learn Perl on my Windows 97 system. In particular...
4647     %%
4648     >Es kamen Außerirdische, die Pyramiden bauten und andere Wunder
4649     >vollbrachten. Dafür wurden sie vergöttert. Diese außerirdischen bauten dann
4650     >wahrscheinlich auch die Cydonia Region.
4651    
4652     Etwa zehnmal zu oft 'Stargate' gesehen, was?
4653     %%
4654     >Die Menschheit kämpft seit Millionen von Jahren gegeneinander.
4655    
4656     Welche Hälfte ist denn da die grössere? :o)
4657     %%
4658     ...am still rebuilding after being hit with a clock changing virus it reset
4659     my clock to 2039 unfortunately for me my OS is beta 98 needless to say it
4660     expired instantly!!!
4661     %%
4662     From: Per Bothner <bothner@cygnus.com>
4663     To: Pal Engstad <engstad@hunt.inmet.com>
4664    
4665     > Linus Torvalds requires that all code in the source is using a tab
4666     > length of 8 spaces, and he also states that you are a bad programmer
4667     > if you write code with more than 3 indentation levels.
4668    
4669     I didn't know that Linus Torvalds has done research on programming styles.
4670     He much have, since why else would you have the audacity quote him as
4671     an authority, on a list where there are dozens of people with more
4672     than double Linus's programming experience?
4673    
4674     > This has caused the code to be fairly easy to read and maintainance is
4675     > pretty straight forward.
4676    
4677     Irrelevant - a kernel is a lot simpler than an optimizing compiler,
4678     in terms of complexity of algorithms and data structures.
4679     %%
4680     Nach der Diskussion muss ich akzeptieren, dass die juengst erfolgte
4681     Erdbeschleunigung von - 0,6 auf - 0,4 Millisekunden kein zwingender Beweis
4682     fuer einen Permanentantrieb ist. Aber: In letzter Zeit kommt es bei mir immer
4683     wieder vor, dass ich Dinge einfach weiss. Selbst wenn ich sie nicht begruenden
4684     kann. Ich weiss trotzdem dass sie stimmen muessen und der Antrieb existiert.
4685     Mit der Zeit findet sich dann auch die Begruendung.
4686     %%
4687     Wir suchen neue AussenMitarbeiterInnen... (S.Pernar@Link-Goe)
4688     %%
4689     hyperltext (hy'perl-text), n. double-quotish-interpolated hypertext markup:
4690     Example:
4691     print qq[[<LI><A HREF="$self->[[url]]">@[[[ucfirst $self->[[title]]]]]</A>\n]];
4692     %%
4693     liperlsuction: What happens to any script longer than 10 lines once
4694     Randal gets his hands on it
4695     %%
4696     Uperl Volta - country where perl programmers control the electricity.
4697     %%
4698     > Anybody successfully installed the win32 version of Perl?
4699    
4700     No! Millions of people don't use perl on win32 machines. You may be the
4701     first if you get it working.
4702     %%
4703     > Macintosh.
4704     > Think different.
4705    
4706     Think Again.
4707     %%
4708     Bill.Cilnton@dyselxia.com
4709     %%
4710     tsatan@hotmail.com writes:
4711     > Why does perl have the "push" and "unshift" functions? ...
4712     > push @nums, 4; is the same as @nums = (@nums, 4);
4713    
4714     What do you want, Scheme? ;)
4715     %%
4716     # There is this special biologist word we use for 'stable'.
4717     # It is 'dead'. -- Jack Cohen
4718     %%
4719     | I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because
4720     | someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the
4721     | top.
4722     %%
4723     I had a student ask about the UN9 operating system. I didn't understabd what
4724     he was talking about so he wrote UNIX on the board.
4725     %%
4726     On 1 Apr 98 17:34:23 GMT, Schulung7 wrote:
4727     ^^^^^^^^^
4728     >Was haltet ihr vom UFO-Absturz in Rosswell?
4729    
4730     Nichts. Und jetzt geh woanders spielen.
4731     %%
4732     >Kann man hier irgendwie mal die UFOs reinbringen, um die es in dieser NG
4733     >gehen soll?
4734    
4735     Nein, der Datentyp wäre inkompatibel. UFOs sind per Definitionem
4736     materielle Objekte (obwohl das zur Zeit fraglich ist ;-), die sich in
4737     diesem Medium nicht austauschen lassen.
4738     %%
4739     Wer redet hier denn von der "Hui Hui"? Ich sprach von "Hui! Hui!".
4740     %%
4741     >> nein...ist kein Sender. Eine taiwanesische Sekte hat behauptet, daß am
4742     >> 25.3. auf allen TVs der Welt Gott auf Kanal 18 erscheinen würde.
4743     >> Ist natuerlich nicht eingetreten.
4744     >
4745     >Aber unsere Haus-Sat-Anlage geht seither nicht mehr.
4746    
4747     Ein Zeichen! Er hat uns ein Zeichen gegeben! Zieht alle euren linken
4748     Schuh aus!
4749     %%
4750     >Klingt nach Erdstillstand.
4751    
4752     Ich bin entsetzt. Man hat hoffentlich sofort Wiederbedrehungsmaßnahmen
4753     eingeleitet?
4754     %%
4755     Mars Global Surveyor Imaging Schedule
4756    
4757    
4758     First opportunity
4759     Approximate
4760     Orbit Internet
4761     Date Time (UTC/Pacific) Number Target Posting
4762    
4763     4-3-98 09:58/1:58 a.m. 216 Viking Lander 1 April 6
4764     4-3-98 21:37/1:37 p.m. 217 Viking Lander 2 April 7
4765     4-4-98 09:16/1:16 a.m. 218 Mars Pathfinder April 7
4766     4-5-98 08:33/12:33 a.m. 220 Cydonia April 6 (mid-a.m.)
4767    
4768     Second opportunity
4769     Approximate
4770     Orbit Internet
4771     Date Time (UTC/Pacific) Number Target Posting
4772    
4773     4-12-98 15:23/ 8:23 a.m. 235 Viking Lander 1 April 14
4774     4-13-98 03:01/ 8:01 p.m. 236 Viking Lander 2 April 15
4775     4-13-98 14:40/ 7:40 a.m. 237 Mars Pathfinder April 15
4776     4-14-98 13:57/ 6:57 a.m. 239 Cydonia April 14 (mid-p.m.)
4777    
4778     Third opportunity
4779     Approximate
4780     Orbit Internet
4781     Date Time (UTC/Pacific) Number Target Posting
4782    
4783     4-21-98 20:45/1:45 p.m. 254 Viking Lander 1 April 23
4784     4-22-98 08:23/1:23 a.m. 255 Viking Lander 2 April 24
4785     4-22-98 20:02/1:02 p.m. 256 Mars Pathfinder April 24
4786     4-23-98 19:18/12:18 p.m. 258 Cydonia April 24 (mid-a.m.)
4787    
4788     %%
4789     > >2. Der Menschheit ist durch Inzucht entstanden. Laut biologischem
4790     > >Wissen, unwahrscheinlich, da Mutation und Mißbildungen auftreten
4791     > >würden.
4792     >
4793     > Vermutung: Das ist auch aufgetreten. Siehe levitische "Gesetze" zur
4794     > "Behandlung" von "Aussatz" insb. im 3. "Mose". Die hatten schon Probleme.
4795     Sag mal, bei Dir piepts wohl nicht mehr richtig! Aussatz, heute besser
4796     unter dem Namen Lepra bekannt, ist keine Erbkrankheit. Es ist eine
4797     (heute heilbare) Infektionskrankheit, verursacht durch Bakterien.
4798     Also nichts von Inzucht, wie Du das in Deinem latenten Rassenwahn
4799     implizierst.
4800     %%
4801     > You might please start up with reading more than one sentence - a skill
4802     > quite familiar in Europe, but as it seems not in the USA.
4803     %%
4804     Yup. Instead of crashing Xservers, now you have crashing kernels.
4805     Big improvement.
4806     %%
4807     -- "Hey look, this new card is for windows and only $xx!"
4808     -- "Yes, but it's braindead and will hurt your performance. Take that one
4809     over there. Besides, it's not an ope.."
4810     -- "Why that one?"
4811     -- "Because it's better, sinc.."
4812     -- "But I can do the same with this one, it's cheaper, and its for windows!"
4813     %%
4814     In der Klinik, in der ich mal arbeiten musste, hatten wir einen echten
4815     Koenig Ludwig II und mindestens fuenf Stueck Jesus - sowas gibts halt,
4816     wenn Du verstehst, was ich meine.
4817     %%
4818     > Hast Du mal einen Stein beobachtet, der eine Unzahl komplexer
4819     > Vorgaenge paresentiert, einschliesslich der Hervorbringung
4820     > etlicher Lebensformen?
4821    
4822     Jepp. Ist nur ein Problem mit der Definition von "zahlreich".
4823    
4824     > Hast Du mal einen Steinen beobachtet, der sich mal eben
4825     > "verwandelt", und auf dem dann lauter Wesen rumkrabbeln,
4826     > die aus ihm selbst entsprungen sind?
4827    
4828     Klar doch. Ist nur ein Problem mit der Definition von "lauter".
4829    
4830     > Ueberspitzt: Hast Du mal einen Steinen beobachtet, der
4831     > ploetzlich zum Lebewesen wird und Dich fragt, wer oder was
4832     > er eigentlich ist?
4833    
4834     Tja, da hören die Übereinstimmungen auf. Ich dachte Du meinst
4835     Erwin Stein. Den kenne ich. Der hat zwei Kinder. Die krabbeln
4836     ab und zu auf ihm herum. Der ist aber nicht plötzlich zum Le-
4837     bewesen geworden, sondern den gibt es nun schon ein wenig
4838     länger. Und er hat mich auch noch nie gefragt, wer oder was
4839     er eigentlich ist. Zumindest nicht in einem Zustand, den man
4840     als "normal" bezeichnen könnte. So wird das anscheinend nix.
4841     Ciao
4842     Stefan
4843     %%
4844     "These download files are in Microsoft Word 6.0 format. After
4845     unzipping, these files can be viewed in any text editor, including
4846     all versions of Microsoft Word, WordPad, and Microsoft Word Viewer."
4847     (http://www.microsoft.com/hwdev/pc99.htm)
4848     %%
4849     Video cards have write-only registers. (of course that is bad design) Let's
4850     say that register 13 is write-only, as is common. It holds an index that
4851     determines what register 69 (also write-only) actually changes. If you write
4852     to register 13 while the accelerator is active, you lock the PCI bus. You
4853     can't determine if the accelerator is active without reading from register
4854     42, but you can't interpret the contents of that register correctly without
4855     knowing what the last accelerator command was. Reading from register 13 gets
4856     you some useless (unrelated) info and _also_ toggles the accelerator on and
4857     off.
4858     %%
4859     Join the Army,
4860     Meet interesting people,
4861     Kill them.
4862     %%
4863     > Wie entsteht Materie? Ich koennte mir vorstellen, dass Energie in Materie
4864     > umwandelbar ist.
4865    
4866     E=m*c^2 (Schon mal gehoert?) (Schon mal verstanden??)
4867     %%
4868     >nach der die Pygmäen geheime UFO-Basen in ausgehöhlten Baumstämmen
4869     >unterhalten (Vorsicht: das war ein Witz :-) ).
4870     %%
4871     > (Bernhard Nahrgang) wrote:
4872     >
4873     > >> Logische Annahme: Die Erde waechst entweder kontinuierlich, oder periodisch
4874     > >> ruckartig.
4875     > >wie kann jemand mit dem IQ von 130 nur SO SELTEN BLOEDE sein??
4876     >
4877     > Norbert ist nicht selten blöde...
4878    
4879     :-)
4880     %%
4881     SAT 1 Teletext: Ein Asteroid mit einem Durchmesser von fast einem Kilometer
4882     rast mit großer Geschwindigkeit auf die Erde zu. US-Astronomen befürchten:
4883     "XF11" könnte im Jahr 2028 auf der Erde einschlagen. Die Folgen wären
4884     verheerend. "Der rasende Stein aus dem All ist eine Gefahr", warnt Jack G.
4885     Hills vom US-Kernforschungszentrum Los Alamos: "Wenn er die Erde trifft,
4886     wird er die Sprengkraft von 320.000 Megatonnen Dynamit haben." Das
4887     entspricht dem Zweimillionenfachen der Atombombe...
4888    
4889     ARD/ZDF Teletext: ASTEROID MIT KURS AUF ERDE ENTDECKT Amerikanische
4890     Astronomen haben einen Asteroiden ausgemacht, der in 30 Jahren der Erde
4891     gefährlich nahekommen wird. Die Gefahr, daß der Asteroid einschlagen wird,
4892     sei gering, aber auch nicht völlig auszuschließen. Nach derzeitigen
4893     Berechnungen wird der Asteroid mit der Bezeichnung "1997 XF11" am 26.Oktober
4894     2028 unserem Planeten am nächsten kommen. "1997 XF11" hat etwa einen
4895     Durchmesser von 1,6 Kilometern. Erstmals käme ein Objekt dieser Größe der
4896     Erde so nahe, hieß es in dem Bericht der Internationalen Astronomischen
4897     Union.
4898    
4899     RTL Teletext: Himmelskörper rast auf Erde zu Ein Asteroid wird im Jahr 2028
4900     der Erde gefährlich nahe kommen. Amerikanische Wissenschaftler haben die
4901     Chance eines Zusammenpralls auf eins zu tausend berechnet. Sollte der
4902     Asteroid, der einen Durchmesser von 1,8 Kilometern hat, aufprallen, könnte
4903     er eine gigantische Flutwelle auslösen, so die Forscher. Auch ein genaues
4904     Datum haben die Wissenschaftler schon errechnet: Von Europa aus wäre das
4905     Naturschauspiel am 26. Oktober 2028 zu beobachten.
4906     %%
4907     * Linux Viruscan.....
4908     Windows 95 Found Remove it ? (Y/y)
4909     %%
4910     >>Hmm, welche Behauptungen entsprechen denn deiner Meinung nach der
4911     >>Realität?
4912     >>
4913     >>Das es das FBI wirklich gibt?
4914     >>Das Scully frigide ist, und deshalb mit Mulder nichts anfangen möchte?
4915     >>Das Mulder homosexuell ist, und deshalb mit Scully nichts anfangen möchte?
4916     >>Das der CSM einen Vertrag mit Marlb*ro hat?
4917     >
4918     >Hinter diesen "Fragen" erkenne ich z.B. eine gut bekannte Strategie. Die
4919     >FBI-Frage ist bewusst absurd. Das Abgleiten ins Sexuelle hat ebenfalls
4920     %%
4921     "'You're a Cirrus. You're crap. I'm an S3. I rule. Thank you and please drive through.'"
4922     %%
4923     > How could you have perl take a set of numbers (1,2,3,4) and put them
4924     > into a random order???
4925     >
4926    
4927     @array=qw(1 2 3 4);
4928     print "@array[1,3,2,0]\n";
4929    
4930     I've checked this against other possible random orderings
4931     of these numbers, and this ordering is at least as random as
4932     any of the other possible ones. The benefit of this one being
4933     that it begins with the number 2, which is my favorite random
4934     number less than 42.
4935     %%
4936     From what I am reading Win98 and NT5.0 will be getting rid of all that
4937     crap anyway. Seems that Microsoft has invented something called TCP/IP and
4938     another really revolutionary concept called DNS that eliminates the
4939     netbios crap too. All that arping from browsers is going to go away.
4940     I also hear rumors that they are on the verge of breakthrough discoveries
4941     called NFS, and LPD too. Given enough time and money, they might
4942     eventually invent Unix.
4943     %%
4944     In Germany, where typeface design has always been a significant part of
4945     the cultural heritage, and where typefounding has remained an important
4946     business, there are more than one kind of copyright-like protections for
4947     typefaces. Certain long-standing industrial design protection laws have
4948     been used to protect typeface designs in litigation over royalties and
4949     plagiarisms. Further, there is a recent law, the so-called
4950     "Schriftzeichengesetz" enacted in 1981, that specifically protects
4951     typeface designs. New designs are registered, as is done with
4952     copyright in most countries. This law only protects new, original
4953     designs. It is available to non-German designers and firms. Therefore,
4954     some type firms and designers routinely copyright new designs in West
4955     Germany. This gives a degree of protection for products marketed in
4956     Germany. Since multinational corporations may find it cheaper to
4957     license a design for world-wide use rather than deal with a special case
4958     in one country, the German law does encourage licensing on a broader
4959     scale than would initially seem to be the case.
4960     %%
4961     [linux processes vs. nt/solaris threads]
4962     Rob Pike pointed out that the solution to slow process creation is
4963     faster process creation, not another kernel abstraction.
4964     %%
4965     Does anybody know how to communicate between a PC and a modem,
4966     using a Perl CGI script?
4967     %%
4968     >I really don't know crap about PERL. How is it different from JAVA?
4969    
4970     One tiny difference: Java can crash your browser. It happened to me last
4971     week.
4972     %%
4973     Brieweb> I heard Randal Schwartz say he could write an entire httpd server in 90 lines
4974     Brieweb> of PERL.
4975     No, that's an http *proxy* server. A simple web server is much shorter.
4976     From "perldoc HTTP::Daemon"...
4977     [Randal Schwartz]
4978     %%
4979     But the possibility of abuse may be a good reason for leaving
4980     capabilities out of other computer languages, it's not a good reason
4981     for leaving capabilities out of Perl.
4982     [Larry Wall in `Macros'. [[perl5-porters]]]
4983     %%
4984     Yes: Java's main advantage over Perl is that it's hard to use for casual
4985     programmers, so keeps all but the most intrepid programmers away from it.
4986     It has no decent support for string processing, allowing you to spend
4987     hours at useless debugging. It has a very restrictive and static system
4988     to make sure you don't try anything interesting. It makes sure that you
4989     use objects, by golly, because James Gosling said so. It's easy for C++
4990     programmers to use, and hard for shell or BASIC programmers to use. It
4991     also only runs on a few systems, locking its customers into a a closed
4992     system and restricting their options.
4993     [Tom Christiansen in `Java Vs. Perl']
4994     %%
4995     <Bill_Gates> Where do you want to go today?
4996     <Phase_5> Where do go tomorrow?
4997     <BlueFlux> Where were you yesterday?!?!
4998     %%
4999     "It's not to control, but to protect the citizens of Singapore. In our
5000     society, you can state your views, but they have to be correct."
5001     Ernie Hai
5002     Coordinator of Singapore Government Internet Project
5003     %%
5004     : I very much prefer a useful error message than a "it produced the wrong
5005     : results" report from the users.
5006    
5007     if i got even "it produced the wrong results" from our users, i would
5008     be in 7th heaven. ours often mail us with such insightful requests as
5009     "can you tell me my email address?" no, sorry, that should be "CAN U
5010     TEL ME MY E MAIL ADRES DUDE?!!!?? HURRY!!!"
5011     %%
5012     There are many intelligent species in the Universe.
5013     They are all owned by cats.
5014     %%
5015     Why dignify your unsustainable, unjustifiable, unprovable feeble
5016     attempts at character assassination with anything resembling a reply?
5017     You only make yourself look foolish by mouthing off like that.
5018     %%
5019     From: L & K Olson <kolson@mbnet.mb.ca>
5020     Subject: If they wrote error messages in haiku ...
5021    
5022     Yesterday it worked
5023     Today it is not working
5024     Windows is like that
5025     - - -
5026     wind catches lily
5027     scatt'ring petals to the wind:
5028     segmentation fault
5029     - - -
5030     Three things are certain:
5031     Death, taxes, and lost data.
5032     Guess which has occurred.
5033     - - -
5034     A file that big?
5035     It might be very useful.
5036     But now it is gone.
5037     - - -
5038     Windows NT crashed.
5039     I am the Blue Screen of Death.
5040     No one hears your screams.
5041     - - -
5042     Errors have occurred.
5043     We won't tell you where or why.
5044     Lazy programmers.
5045     - - -
5046     Seeing my great fault
5047     Through darkening blue windows
5048     I begin again
5049     - - -
5050     The code was willing,
5051     It considered your request,
5052     But the chips were weak.
5053     - - -
5054     Printer not ready.
5055     Could be a fatal error.
5056     Have a pen handy?
5057     - - -
5058     Server's poor response
5059     Not quick enough for browser.
5060     Timed out, plum blossom.
5061     - - -
5062     Chaos reigns within.
5063     Reflect, repent, and reboot.
5064     Order shall return.
5065     - - -
5066     Login incorrect.
5067     Only perfect spellers may
5068     enter this system.
5069     - - -
5070     This site has been moved.
5071     We'd tell you where, but then we'd
5072     have to delete you.
5073     - - -
5074     ABORTED effort:
5075     Close all that you have.
5076     You ask way too much.
5077     - - -
5078     First snow, then silence.
5079     This thousand dollar screen dies
5080     so beautifully.
5081     - - -
5082     With searching comes loss
5083     and the presence of absence:
5084     "My Novel" not found.
5085     - - -
5086     The Tao that is seen
5087     Is not the true Tao, until
5088     You bring fresh toner.
5089     - - -
5090     The Web site you seek
5091     cannot be located but
5092     endless others exist
5093     - - -
5094     Stay the patient course
5095     Of little worth is your ire
5096     The network is down
5097     - - -
5098     A crash reduces
5099     your expensive computer
5100     to a simple stone.
5101     - - -
5102     There is a chasm
5103     of carbon and silicon
5104     the software can't bridge
5105     - - -
5106     To have no errors
5107     Would be life without meaning
5108     No struggle, no joy
5109     - - -
5110     You step in the stream,
5111     but the water has moved on.
5112     This page is not here.
5113     - - -
5114     No keyboard present
5115     Hit F1 to continue
5116     Zen engineering?
5117     - - -
5118     Hal, open the file
5119     Hal, open the damn file, Hal
5120     open it, please Hal
5121     - - -
5122     Out of memory.
5123     We wish to hold the whole sky,
5124     But we never will.
5125     - - -
5126     Having been erased,
5127     The document you're seeking
5128     Must now be retyped.
5129     - - -
5130     The ten thousand things
5131     How long do any persist?
5132     Netscape, too, has gone.
5133     - - -
5134     Rather than a beep
5135     Or a rude error message,
5136     These words: "File not found."
5137     - - -
5138     Serious error.
5139     All shortcuts have disappeared
5140     Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
5141     %%
5142     "The obvious mathematical breakthrough would be development of an easy way
5143     to factor large prime numbers." -- Bill Gates from "The Road Ahead," p. 265.
5144     %%
5145     > What is the Windows equivalent of the first line used for
5146     > UNIX (#!/usr/local/bin/perl) that tells where the Perl interpreter is?
5147    
5148     Windows hasn't gotten quite as far in functionality as, say, BSD Unix in the
5149     early 1980s.
5150     %%
5151     > I have a chat script, that will work fine for a bit then after a while
5152     > the private messages will stop working. It might be because I changed
5153     > something, but chances are that isn't the case. I re-install a fresh
5154     > copy, paths are correct, and they still don't work
5155    
5156     I think you are experiencing GOVERNMENT CONTROL. You see, everyone
5157     with a chat script is being scrutinised by the department of CHAT
5158     control. Whenever they see some message they don't like, they
5159     introduce some little goblin called feature-creep in your program. if
5160     you have lots of these little devils, your program migth acquire so
5161     many new features that it just stops working.
5162    
5163     This also applies to Microsoft products.
5164    
5165     > Does it make sense for certain features to just not work?! If you can
5166     > help, or have suggestions, get back to me, PLEASE:)
5167    
5168     Yes, it makes perfect sense. Especially if they're features which
5169     really are bugs. And especially if they're 'private' messages. You
5170     know perfectly well that the government doesn't like private messages.
5171    
5172     Hope this explains what's going on
5173     Martien Verbruggen
5174     %%
5175     ...code? If you're on a misconfigured NT server (is that redundant?), you...
5176     %%
5177     X11R6.1-based free X server compiles, links and crashes under IRIX(TM).
5178     %%
5179     -------------- please bite here ------------- bitte hier abbeissen ---------
5180     %%
5181     "Frag mal, auf was fuer uptimes man kommt, wenn man Software-Entwicklung
5182     unter NT macht..." "Das koennen bis zu dreissig Minuten werden - in der
5183     Mittagspause." -- Andreas Bogk, Kai Fett, de.alt.sysadmin.recovery
5184     %%
5185     > ++ A lot of posters here have .sigs that include perl one liners.
5186     > ++ Is there a safe way to run them, and be assured that they wont
5187     > ++ damage and/or erase files? (or e-mail off my shadow file)
5188     >
5189     > Just make sure you understand it ;)
5190    
5191     I nominate Abigail for best response of the year with this one. Come to
5192     think of it, I nominate it for best response of next year, too.
5193     %%
5194     Your moderator will be spending the next week on a beach on a small island
5195     where the phones don't work very well, so there won't be any comp.compilers
5196     until the 28th. Any messages you send in will wait here until I get back and
5197     should be posted on March 1st or 2nd.
5198     %%
5199     But now, in comp.lang.perl.misc, you have a bunch of people who aren't
5200     even asking how to make the pieces fit together, but what the
5201     individual pieces are. ("How do I get my lego project to roll accross
5202     the table?" "You use one of those pieces that have the wheels
5203     attached.") Or questions that aren't about building at all. ("The
5204     motor stopped moving. How do I get it to start again?" "The batteries
5205     are probably dead. You can buy new batteries at any department or
5206     convienience store.")
5207     %%
5208     : how do i make my perl script run?
5209     Get up at 91 minutes before dawn, clothe yourself in neon green body
5210     %%
5211     for some reason Windoze users don't seem to expect docs to come with an archive
5212     %%> ToiLeTGoD
5213    
5214     Well, well.. I always wondered who/what made that flush thingy work.
5215     Pretty cool name, dude. (not)
5216     %%
5217     Ummm...create "comp.lang.perl.wizards", make it moderated and all posts,
5218     including xposts, go into /dev/null. Most FAQers won't have the Usenet
5219     background to understand that such groups are either a) a wasteland
5220     populated (briefly) by persons like themselves, or b) point to /dev/null.
5221     %%
5222     Lazy people never bother to actually read the manual. Instead they (like
5223     kids) pick something with big, colorful buttons.
5224     -- Eugene Tyurin <gene@insti.physics.sunysb.edu>
5225     %%
5226     The Average Person's Axioms of First Order Predicate Logic:
5227     (A => B) => (B => A)
5228     (There exists) x A(x) => (For all) x A(x)
5229     (A => C) & (B => C) => (A => B) - Warren Vonroeschlaub
5230     %%
5231     cal 9 1752
5232     %%
5233     Installing unix fixes the [VMS] bug.
5234     -Barry Shein
5235     %%
5236     And this horrible free-for-all will be left to children wondering around
5237     by themselves in the dark because they refuse to turn on the light and
5238     read the manual.
5239     %%
5240     "SPARC" is "CRAPS" backwards --Rob Pike
5241     %%
5242     I increasingly begin to understand why some universities require
5243     that its compsci majors study the Euclid's Prime Number Theorem,
5244     the Fundamental Theorem of Calculus, Cantor's Diagonalization Proof,
5245     Goedel's Incompleteness Theorem, and the ramifications of Halting Problem
5246     in everyday life. These may not be involved in daily programming, but
5247     it helps develop a rigorous mind. And it gives those who would progress
5248     from typist to word-processor devotee to HTML documenter to CGI scripter
5249     to distributed multithreaded operating systems design specialist cause
5250     for pause. You just can't do that without proper training.
5251     %%
5252     comp.lang.perl.i'm-from-microsoft-so-won't-read-documentation
5253     %%
5254     I suggest you install a newsserver, and keep a local spool. Anything else
5255     is too much work, and fairly silly. The Internet has catupulted even
5256     the Wintel victims past the days of BBS toys.
5257     %%
5258     > Help help! Pls advise me thru email.
5259    
5260     I advise you to buy a new keyboard; one that has all the keys you
5261     need.
5262     %%
5263     Christian Fundamentalism: The doctrine that there is an absolutely
5264     powerful, infinitely knowledgeable, universe spanning entity that is
5265     deeply and personally concerned about my sex life.
5266     %%
5267     I find the first particularly useful in destroying the miswrapped
5268     lines stemming from brain-damaged "it's just another word processor"
5269     newsreaders. You know,
5270     those postings that always seem to go to the edge of the line and then
5271     back
5272     again to the start, as this paragraph has. These are just too painful
5273     to read. Just kill them. It's not worth your time trying to figure
5274     out what they're saying.
5275     %%
5276     It is most annoying to receive junk mail describing how to purchase 93
5277     million addresses, while knowing that yours is one of them.
5278     %%
5279     I'm surprised Tom, how could it miss the "X-Mailer: Mozilla 4.01 [en] (WinNT;
5280     U)" header line? Personally, I find the attempted use of Netscape as a
5281     newsreader even worse then the attempted use of WinNT as an OS. :-)
5282    
5283     But the combination.... *sutters*
5284     %%
5285     Hm... my new killfile isn't detecting you're posting from Windows.
5286     Darn it.
5287     %%
5288     At least he didn't post in all caps.
5289     %%
5290     http://language.perl.com/CPAN-local/doc/FAQs/cgi/idiots-guide.html
5291     %%
5292     I think the biggest problem with M.S.A. is that the scripts work for Matt, but
5293     the majority of people trying to use them are from the
5294     "Wintel/AOL/FrontPage/push-a-button/HTML-is-programming/no-programming-required"
5295     school of non-learning. It isn't a problem with the code, per se, but with those
5296     trying to use it.
5297     %%
5298     "Linux can emulate an C64 on my AMDK6PR200 at full speed. Windows can't."
5299     %%
5300     cdog wrote:
5301     >
5302     > Is this group active?
5303     No.
5304    
5305     If you had spent half a second LOOKING at the group before posting, you
5306     probably could have come to that conclusion yourself.
5307    
5308     On a personal note, I died 3 years, 8 days, 5 minutes, 16 seconds, and
5309     345 milliseconds ago, but who's counting.
5310     %%
5311     "Security through obscurity is no security at all."
5312     -comp.lang.perl.misc newsgroup posting
5313     %%
5314     "Windows 95 will now attempt to blow chunks across your primary partition.
5315     Press any key to continue..."
5316     %%
5317     NT 5.0 is the last nail in the Unix coffin. Interestingly, Unix
5318     isn't in the coffin... It's wondering what the heck is sealing
5319     itself into a wooden box 6 feet underground...
5320     %%
5321     The Wall St Journal (1996-01-22, page 1) reported that Cuba is
5322     considering jumping across the International Date Line, just so that
5323     it's the first into the year 2000. So it's possible you'll have to
5324     adjust your travel plans.
5325     %%
5326     "Wo kämen wir hin, wenn alle sagten, wo kämen wir hin, und niemand ginge
5327     hin, um einmal zu schauen, wohin man käme, wenn man ginge." -- Kurt Marti
5328     %%
5329     The Takeuchi function is a popular benchmark of function calling due to its
5330     highly recursive nature. It's defined as:
5331    
5332     tak x y z = z, if y >= x
5333     = tak (tak (x-1) y z) (tak (y - 1) z x) (tak (z - 1) x y), otherwise
5334    
5335     For this benchmark, the function is invoked as:
5336    
5337     tak 18 12 6
5338     %%
5339     "Nobody will ever need more than 640k RAM!"
5340     -- Bill Gates
5341     "Windows 95 needs at least 8 MB RAM."
5342     -- Bill Gates
5343     "Nobody will ever need Windows 95."
5344     -- logical conclusion
5345     %%
5346     Year Name James Bond Book
5347     - ---- -------------------------------- -------------- ----
5348     50's James Bond TV Series Barry Nelson
5349     1962 Dr. No Sean Connery 1958
5350     1963 From Russia With Love Sean Connery 1957
5351     1964 Goldfinger Sean Connery 1959
5352     1965 Thunderball Sean Connery 1961
5353     1967* Casino Royale David Niven 1954
5354     1967 You Only Live Twice Sean Connery 1964
5355     1969 On Her Majesty's Secret Service George Lazenby 1963
5356     1971 Diamonds Are Forever Sean Connery 1956
5357     1973 Live And Let Die Roger Moore 1955
5358     1974 The Man With The Golden Gun Roger Moore 1965
5359     1977 The Spy Who Loved Me Roger Moore 1962 (novelette)
5360     1979 Moonraker Roger Moore 1955
5361     1981 For Your Eyes Only Roger Moore 1960 (novelette)
5362     1983 Octopussy Roger Moore 1965
5363     1983* Never Say Never Again Sean Connery
5364     1985 A View To A Kill Roger Moore 1960 (novelette)
5365     1987 The Living Daylights Timothy Dalton 1965 (novelette)
5366     * -- Not a Broccoli production.
5367     %%
5368     Windows NT: n.
5369     32-bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16-bit patch to an 8-bit
5370     operating system originally coded for a 4-bit microprocessor, written
5371     by a 2-bit company that can't stand for 1 bit of competition.
5372     %%
5373     Auf der Kiste läuft EHNIX, das ist ZUNIX kompatibel.